I have come over from the TSM site - having started naltrexone 3 weeks ago, things have spiralled to a whole new low. I am a chronic alcohol binger and cocaine user. my life goes from a fw days AF to one drink....which leads to 1000 and to cocaine 90% of the time. This is despite best intentions of course.....I am 33 and absolutely petrifued. I have done rehab. I have done meetings. I have relapsed cronically whether i am trying abstinence or not. I just cannot stay sober for any decent length of time(apart from rehab where i managed a paltry 4 months after i came out...) I was so excited that naltroxene might be the answer for me. I have been advised tho that bac may be better. I defo suffer bad anxiety in certain social situations, I clam up, feel uncomfortable, just feel boring and stiff. drink and drugs opens me right up, makes me feel 'alive, fun, cool(all that nonsense....). Unfort this is too overwhelming and alluring i guess and the addict wins every time, despite the fact i know the consequences are so so so despairing. I am having suicidal thoughts and i am really losing hope as to what my strategy should be....i know that i am on my last life, my body will simply not take this for more than another year or two. My liver is already very strained not surprisingly.
anyway - please advise re bac- it sounds as if it is helpful for the anxiety suffer and can help reduce cravings. Interestingly, I am able to drink perfectly normally in some environments but the bender is always lurking.....
I am terrified and wd really appreciate some advise
Many Thanks
Charlie
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