This Redhead's Baclofen Thread

[Murphyx]

This Redhead's Baclofen Thread

Yikes, sorry to hear that about Fidel's little problem. I suggest next time you go out with someone, you insist on inspecting the goods at the restaurant.

redhead77;1129512 wrote: I need to unload,

That's why God invented AA batteries.

[Ne/Neva Eva]

This Redhead's Baclofen Thread

Murphyx;1129542 wrote: That's why God invented AA batteries.

And thank God for that!

I didn't go bac far enough to read the patient thing or the religion thing. I get it, fwiw, even without reading the original posts.

I have quit MWO more times than I can count. I finally realized two things: It is a valuable resource, one that I underestimate time and time again. It has been invaluable in my process and my progress. I am where I am because of the people I've met on MWO. Which leads right into point #2.

I owe it to myself and to others to pay it forward. I learned as much from the fallen soldiers as I have from the success stories. I would NEVA EVA have taken bac and found indifference if not for this site. If not for the ones who befriended me, who continued to take their precious time, the most valuable resource, and coddle and cajole me.

When I first read your farewell I was rather ticked off, Redh. I was about to call you this fine Sunday morning and lay on the guilt and the (justified, imho) anger. Wasn't it I that you called out as inspiring you? How can you not spend the time to help another, or many others??? and on and on and on. Self-righteousness galore.

Then I laughed. I knew you'd be bac. Not because this site is addictive or any such negative thing. But because we are the only ones in the ENTIRE UNIVERSE that KNOW.

I'm now working on finding balance, in this and in all things. It's a beautiful, humbling and inspiring process. Just when I think I've got it all mapped out I get a desperate plea. Or on the contrary, a reminder that I am not, in fact, vital to this site.

Whatever. I'm still carrying the torch, reluctant to let it go, and desperate to give it up. Even to Murphy. Who is inspiring people left and right to come out, come out wherever you are! And even spurring them to indifference! Lordy, there is no accounting for taste.

Point is this: If you are under the impression that there is not an RN who hangs on your every word, but is scared to death to post or let her/himself be known for fear of professional reprisal you are sadly mistaken. S/he is out there right now, reading this. That I promise you. (your industry is rife with alkies. you know it, too.)

So look for that balance, RedH. Keep striving. And pay it forward sister. We are ALL carrying the torch, and stronger and richer for it.
(Your other Karen should help with that. This one will too!)

Love you.
Ne

[RudyB]

This Redhead's Baclofen Thread

oh reddy red red! :l

i'm so glad you checked in. your apologies are so silly, woman! i was just wondering if anything came of LL, and am glad to know, though sorry to hear about the let down (pun intended). i had a similar evening, but without all the build-up. my dude didn't even show up (or call!). guess i'll get some AA batteries (i WILL capitalize there!). very important, evidently, for we women with needs.

i need you, single mom who's also cracking the crud (reference to one of ne's brilliant posts you may remember). and so do the nurses (another ne reference). stay with me on the journey to enlightenment (or indifference; buddhists might call them the same thing). please. you don't have to make it a full-time job, but keep us posted (another brilliant pun!), and know that we love you just the way you are. and that we learn things from you that nobody else can teach; there's only one you. your support is awesome and your too-frequent absence (oxymoron?) would truly suck.

so, :thanks: in advance for sticking around.

:h ruby d

[Murphyx]

This Redhead's Baclofen Thread

It's good to let people know they're missed and their presence always appreciated, but it's a thin line dividing that from a guilt trip. Everyone needs space sometimes. Just sayin' peeps.

[RudyB]

This Redhead's Baclofen Thread

yeah, i get it murph. you're right. just feeling needy here, i guess. red, take it as a compliment, and take it or leave it. no guilt intended.

[Murphyx]

This Redhead's Baclofen Thread

I'm not sure Red could fulfil your present needs...arf arf!

[redhead77]

This Redhead's Baclofen Thread

Rudy, I read your PM. I'm not going anywhere woman. I just posted on MWO on Sunday, I believe. I'm just busy and somewhat avoidant. You never have to worry about offending me on my thread. Ever. I don't mind if my thread is a tad racy. I'm full of spice and I say bring it! I'll be updating soon. I just have to work a few maniac shifts first.

Same goes for PMs. :l I haven't forgotten.

[redhead77]

This Redhead's Baclofen Thread

Oh, and Rudy, I think I want to make my sig Pelirroja. What do you think?

[redhead77]

This Redhead's Baclofen Thread

I meant Pelirrojas. C minus for sure.

[RudyB]

This Redhead's Baclofen Thread

oh, red, i am so relieved. i guess i'm a bit insecure lately. your words make my heart sigh.

i give you an A+ for 'peliroja.' you don't need the 's' (in 'pelirojas'). redhead translates perfectly in your first idea. extra credit for the effort and ingenuity!

good luck with your manic shifts. you'll be on my mind.

besitos,
rudy b

[bleep]

This Redhead's Baclofen Thread

I quite like your current sig, tbh.

[redhead77]

This Redhead's Baclofen Thread

Soooo, time to update. I don't want to. It's not what eveyone wants to hear. You all know the extremes I had to go to for indifference. For any of you that forgot, or don't know me, I had to quit my job. It was one of the hardest things I've ever done in my life. I think anyway, there's been so much hard, I don't know how to rate it. It is UP there.

I have a boat load of issues. One should never quit their job in my situation. But I had the ultimate of faith, that what I was doing was right. I had prayed, ad naseum, and while I have a hard time believing and accepting, I knew in this one case, I was being spoken to. I needed to take the leap of faith. And I did. I leaped. Begging and praying for a relief from alcholism. I found it. It was rather soon after I gave it my all. This would be unlike so many others, out there. It still wasn't easy for me. I suffered some very severe SEs on baclofen, as I was climbing, and at my switch dose. I stayed for 4 weeks, believing there would be reprieve. There had to be. There wasn't. I was out of money. Worried about buying my baclofen. Worried about buying food. Instead of asking family for help, which would be an option for me,
I panicked. I started searching furiously for a job. Of course, I found one quickly, I am a nurse. I still couldn't work. I couldn't concentrate on my switch dose to take the tests neccesary for the job. My not being able to ask for help or reach out to anyone will always devastate me (until I decide it won't).

I decided to titrate down ferveshly. I mean I started skipping doses even. Part of it was, I started to hoard my bac, as I was fearful I would run out. The other part was to get rid of the evil SEs. I honestly felt I couldn't take it anymore.

To be continued......

I gotta make a few phone calls. Oh, my unsucceful lovers. They are still out there. Trying to contact me. I figure tonight I will take care of it all. Maybe not you all, but at least I'm starting. To be continued.

[LadyLush]

This Redhead's Baclofen Thread

HEY NOW!

Take care of "what' all? get your ass back on here. What the hey sweetie? What are you doing? I am going to find your number! Strength is in numbers...GET BACK ON HERE!



LL:l

[redhead77]

This Redhead's Baclofen Thread

I have it all scheduled. I'm making my first phone call at 10p, my time. Bac to the important stuff. I decided to go down like crazy, at a fast pace. I thought I was okay. I have been mostly okay. Isn't *mostly*, a guarded word? I drank twice this last week. It wasn't the frequency of my drinking that troubled me. It was how I drank. I didn't drink an enormous amount. Not like before. But my alcohol tolerance isn't the same, it has plummeted. I am an official cheap date. A couple glasses of wine and I feel smashed. I've still decided to partake in those, this last week. This isn't indifference folks. I remember indifference. For me, it was pouring a glass of wine, maybe drinking it, maybe not. The next glass was usually poured out. I just didn't care about booze at all.

Okay, bac later. It's that time. I have to get this stuff done so I can breathe.

[Ne/Neva Eva]

This Redhead's Baclofen Thread

bummer

I got so much out of your last post, RedH. I can't even tell you! It was very nice to have someone express a bit of what was going on with me. Made me feel more comfortable. Very sad it's gone. :-(