I was going to wait and write this on Friday. But I am absolutely positive, after today, that the switch has truly occurred. I'm crying as I write this. My whole life is beginning. I can't fucking believe it. (Warning: lots of gratuitous cursing in this post!)
When I realized that it had happened yesterday, I was so dumbfounded and joyful that I couldn't find words to express it. When I did find the words, they came to me in the form of a Pulp Fiction quote, and Jules was talking to me:
We should be fuckin' dead now, my friend! We just witnessed a miracle, and I want you to fucking acknowledge it!
So Jules, thank you for giving me the words I wanted to say. I am here to acknowledge it, my friend. It is real. :h
A little bit of back story:
I've been drinking 3-4 beers a night for some time now. When I went up to 190 last Friday, I was having a hard time adjusting to the dose. I felt "bac sick." Nausea, dizziness, the whole works. I haven't been as active on the forums for a few days because of this. Anyway, on Monday, I could only bring myself to drink two beers. They tasted absolutely toxic to me, like I was drinking poison. But I forced my way through them.
Yesterday, I felt absolutely awful all day. Nauseated, dizzy, headache-y. Every time I imagined the taste of beer I wanted to throw up. I kept thinking, "Wow, this bac-sickness sure feels like a bad hangover." When I got home, I still had two beers in the fridge, but I had no desire to touch them. I felt awesome, because I felt that the switch was happening. Anyway, I got through the night AL-free, effortlessly. I'd occasionally ask myself, "Do you want those beers in the fridge? and my answer was always a resounding "Yuck! No!"
So this morning, I got up and went to work. The first thing I noticed was that I didn't feel sick for once. Then it occurred to me: all the time I thought I was "bac-sick," I was suffering from hangovers. My hangover yesterday was from TWO BEERS the night before! My body was truly rejecting alcohol! When I got off work today I felt like I was floating on air. No desire for alcohol, not a single craving for those two beers in my fridge.
Anyway, back to my story!
I've never really fought the bac, nor have I ever wanted to quit. I've suffered relatively few SEs, other than the dizziness/nausea (which I now realize were hangovers). I always figured the switch would just happen. I hadn't planned on it happening so soon! I have so much in common with Neva Eva, including the fact that we both had an almost bottomless limit for alcohol. I figured I'd probably have to go up to 300 or more.
The "switch dose" really is a genetic thing. NE and I weigh the same amount. For whatever reason, my body just gave up my alcoholism without a fight at 190 ml/day. I don't know why, nor do I care much at this point!
So here I am. Two months to the day after I started on Bac, I quit being an alcoholic. I am still trying to wrap my brain around it. It's a fucking miracle! THANK YOU, DR. AMEISEN AND DR. LEVIN!!! If anyone has any questions about the efficacy of bac, feel free to message me. I can say, without a doubt, that this stuff works.
I HAVE MADE IT TO THE OTHER SIDE!
And things are looking wonderful from over here. I really can't contain myself. I've been vacillating between crying and jumping for joy!
I am no longer an alcoholic. What a fucking blessing. I can't even believe I am typing those words. Thank you SO much, MWO, for all your support. I promise to stick around and testify for Bac. That drug, and Drs. Ameisen and Levin, and all of you have saved my life. I cannot possibly be more grateful :l :h
When I realized that it had happened yesterday, I was so dumbfounded and joyful that I couldn't find words to express it. When I did find the words, they came to me in the form of a Pulp Fiction quote, and Jules was talking to me:
We should be fuckin' dead now, my friend! We just witnessed a miracle, and I want you to fucking acknowledge it!
So Jules, thank you for giving me the words I wanted to say. I am here to acknowledge it, my friend. It is real. :h
A little bit of back story:
I've been drinking 3-4 beers a night for some time now. When I went up to 190 last Friday, I was having a hard time adjusting to the dose. I felt "bac sick." Nausea, dizziness, the whole works. I haven't been as active on the forums for a few days because of this. Anyway, on Monday, I could only bring myself to drink two beers. They tasted absolutely toxic to me, like I was drinking poison. But I forced my way through them.
Yesterday, I felt absolutely awful all day. Nauseated, dizzy, headache-y. Every time I imagined the taste of beer I wanted to throw up. I kept thinking, "Wow, this bac-sickness sure feels like a bad hangover." When I got home, I still had two beers in the fridge, but I had no desire to touch them. I felt awesome, because I felt that the switch was happening. Anyway, I got through the night AL-free, effortlessly. I'd occasionally ask myself, "Do you want those beers in the fridge? and my answer was always a resounding "Yuck! No!"
So this morning, I got up and went to work. The first thing I noticed was that I didn't feel sick for once. Then it occurred to me: all the time I thought I was "bac-sick," I was suffering from hangovers. My hangover yesterday was from TWO BEERS the night before! My body was truly rejecting alcohol! When I got off work today I felt like I was floating on air. No desire for alcohol, not a single craving for those two beers in my fridge.
Anyway, back to my story!
I've never really fought the bac, nor have I ever wanted to quit. I've suffered relatively few SEs, other than the dizziness/nausea (which I now realize were hangovers). I always figured the switch would just happen. I hadn't planned on it happening so soon! I have so much in common with Neva Eva, including the fact that we both had an almost bottomless limit for alcohol. I figured I'd probably have to go up to 300 or more.
The "switch dose" really is a genetic thing. NE and I weigh the same amount. For whatever reason, my body just gave up my alcoholism without a fight at 190 ml/day. I don't know why, nor do I care much at this point!
So here I am. Two months to the day after I started on Bac, I quit being an alcoholic. I am still trying to wrap my brain around it. It's a fucking miracle! THANK YOU, DR. AMEISEN AND DR. LEVIN!!! If anyone has any questions about the efficacy of bac, feel free to message me. I can say, without a doubt, that this stuff works.
I HAVE MADE IT TO THE OTHER SIDE!
And things are looking wonderful from over here. I really can't contain myself. I've been vacillating between crying and jumping for joy!
I am no longer an alcoholic. What a fucking blessing. I can't even believe I am typing those words. Thank you SO much, MWO, for all your support. I promise to stick around and testify for Bac. That drug, and Drs. Ameisen and Levin, and all of you have saved my life. I cannot possibly be more grateful :l :h
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