Daily dosing record - beatle

[Cinders]

Daily dosing record - beatle

Beatle,

Great you did finally get some rest. I know what you mean. I was awake at 3:00 a.m. this morning and could not go back to sleep. :-(

However, since I stayed sober yesterday, I feel pretty darned good.

Your plan sounds very good. Keep us posted on your progress, your reactions to the increases and let us know first thing when you hit the switch!! We are all rooting for you.

Cindi

[bleep]

Daily dosing record - beatle

Thanks for the update beatle, and really glad to hear you got a little sleep. 7 hours is a pretty good rest by anyone's standards! Are you planning to do it again? It's probably a good idea at least once a week to schedule a proper rest.

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Daily dosing record - beatle

Or you could schedule sleep, hmmm, every night?

I'm kidding and I don't mean to make light. It's a very onerous/odious SE for sure. Glad you got some rest. I hope you can use the same tools and will power to get more of it. By the time I got way up there I could barely keep my eyes open. I think. Who would know?

Glad you posted. If nothing else you could come on here and just post, "I'm taking xxxmgs, I have been for x number of days and will move up/down on this date." That helped me a GREAT deal to keep track of where I was and what I was supposed to be doing! Not at all easy, in the best of times!

Hugs, as always!
Ne

[beatle]

Daily dosing record - beatle

Point well taken, NE.

It's not that I want to write tomes every few days, it's just that right about the time I should post, everything seems to change.

But still...

And sometimes I'm in transit (and will be again soon).

But still...

And Bleep, yes, I plan to do it soon again... how about you?

[beatle]

Daily dosing record - beatle

and Cindi, yay on the sober day. I know how hard that is... I can barely ever manage. It's big.

How about today?

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Daily dosing record - beatle

They're not tomes, beatle. They're barely even novellas! imho.

Looking forward to hearing more soon.

Safe travels.

Congratulations, too, Cinders!

[Cinders]

Daily dosing record - beatle

Beatle,

Yes, a sober day today. Many meetings with the client and then hubby will be home. Looking forward to stringing two whole days together. sigh

Upping my dose to 40 mgs today. A bit nervous but know it is the only way to get back up there.

Hopefully that cold front won't mess up your travel plans.

Cindi

[redhead77]

Daily dosing record - beatle

beatle;1090965 wrote:

I started to reassess my plan and decided I would stay one more day at the +/? 260mg/day dose, and then go back up to 285 a couple days and then upwards pretty quickly? but not 350 all of a sudden, although I will never know if that?s what I should have done?

Sounds like a reasonable plan to me. I do hope you again find some sweet slumber. I have taken to going to bed much earlier than I did in the past. Like you said, when that feeling hits, I try not to fight it. I wake up a couple of times at night, but force myself back to bed.

I wish you safe travels beatle.


Cinders, I tend to agree, it's scary to go up. For me the alternative is far scarier. I think for some, effortless reduction (not indifference), doesn't come till the 140-160 range. Keep on TTDPs. Were rooting for ya.

[Lo0p]

Daily dosing record - beatle

In a hotel on my cell phone (and super busy) till Wednesday. My biggest fear is that if you approach this like you have been (slowly) you'll end up @ 350 with no switch.

[Cinders]

Daily dosing record - beatle

Geez Louise, Lo0P,

I took 10 mgs at 6:30 and another 10 mgs at 10:30, I feel like my legs are lead!!

I am having issues typing the document up for my 1:00 meeting.

I think, in my case, going up too high too fast is not feasible.

I suffered sleep paralysis several times in the past when I was up to 120 mgs/day.

I just can't do that again. It is too scary for me. The inability to move has always been one of my major fears.

(Wetting the bed was not fun, either...:blush

Cindi

[Lo0p]

Daily dosing record - beatle

Cinders;1091139 wrote:
I suffered sleep paralysis

I can definitely empathize with you on that one. Give me pain, death or a big green alien sucking on my toe any day, but that...


If (big if) I didn't know what indifference felt like, that might have been impossible for me to overcome. I don't envy you all. I hate writing this but it's true. Those were some of the most horrifying moments of my life.

Huh. Not funny at all but on second thought, what caused mine was extremely high dose hydrocodone, and I sure as hell didn't stop doing that.

[Cinders]

Daily dosing record - beatle

Thanks for understanding lo0p, if you have never suffered from sleep paralysis you can't relate.

Beatle,

Did you make it to Chicago safely? It looked like the weather might be okay for you.

The weather wasn't pretty here but we didn't get any damage.

I sure am draggy on this 40 mgs schedule. :-(

Cindi

[bleep]

Daily dosing record - beatle

Cinders, as I'm sure you know, you'll get wildly different SE's at different doses. Is it possible to change the dose any, the draggy feeling might leave you, to be replaced with endless energy!

[beatle]

Daily dosing record - beatle

Yes, I made it here. And it is overwhelming (to use an underwhelming word).

Looking in the eyes of a dying person for hours at a time, feelings of painful empathy and endless fear... contemplating mortality and beyond...


And dang, I saw Dr. L today!


I do not have time to explain now, I must get back to staring into death, and gleaning something otherworldly out of it, both terrifying and edifying...

But, I will get back to my Dr L meeting... also edifying, although not otherworldly.. .or maybe?

Main point re: Dr L -- it was all about ME, that's the way he steered it. My other concerns for the questions brought up here on MWO were brushed aside, as he focused on solving MY problems.

But lots of what he had to say will apply to many people here, and I will share everything with you as soon as I can.

At the end of the discussion, I mentioned how we share information here on MWO about our meetings with him and everything else, and was it ok if I shared what we talked about?

And his answer was: "Absolutely! Please do!"

He said his goal was to get the information out there, however it could be done.

I took copious notes with lots of quotes, and I think a lot of it will applicable to many people...

But I am really not being coy here... please understand.

[Lo0p]

Daily dosing record - beatle

Holy...