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    New, again. My thread

    Hi ? another long-time lurker coming out of the woodwork. And with a bac-story, no less (long post warning).
    I?ve been taking Bac since early/mid-December, and titrated up very slowly, for a number of reasons. I?m at 65 mg per day right now, and can sincerely say that I?m astounded at the results. I won?t claim that I?ve hit the switch ? in fact I wasn?t aiming for it. What has happened is that I am largely (not completely) indifferent to AL, drinking about 5-6 units (US measure) per week. I feel great, my life-long anxiety is way down, SEs have been manageable... I could go on and on. I?m experienced enough to know that various members and lurkers will be interested in various aspects of my story (well, I hope so...), so I?ve broken it down a bit. Frankly, writing is easier with headings!

    Stats: Female, 50, 5?9.5?, ~140 lb, Canadian.

    Drinking history: Like many here, it?s a long one. First drunk at 13 :happy:, many years of excessive drinking, broken up by many years of complete non-drinking and social drinking (whatever that is). About a year ago, drinking about 1.5 bottles of wine a night, I ended up on the TSM site, wondering about Nal accessibility in Canada. I ?met? Road to Recovery there, who suggested this site, and Bac. By then I knew that online pharmacies and this country were not compatible, and realized that my doctor would not prescribe Bac until I had at least tried to cut down or stop. So I started modding here, with some success. But I never got out from under the spell of AL, and when October hit, the sun disappeared, and my SAD kicked in, I was bac up to nearly a bottle of wine nearly every night :upset:.

    Bac history: I went to my doctor in December with nocturnal leg and foot cramps of long-standing, restless leg syndrome that was affecting me even during the day, and a request for Baclofen. She gave me a script for 10 mg per day. I approached a lovely lady on TSM forum who had said that she had a pile of Bac she couldn?t take, and asked her if she would be willing to sell it to me. She was, and over Christmas she sent me a ?hard candy gift box? that contained ~180 10 mg tabs of Bac :yay:. It was a start! Shortly thereafter I asked Road ? who had become a good cyber-friend and tireless supporter ? if he had any leftovers since hitting his switch and going down to zero. He was willing to send me 180 20 mg tabs :l(wouldn?t take a penny for them), and I was almost in business. I went bac to my doc a couple of weeks ago, told her I wanted 20 mg per day because it was helping my muscle issues (it really does, that?s the truth). She was very reluctant, and I was confirmed in my suspicion that she would neva eva have given me high-dose Bac for drinking problems. Eva. I had been going up steadily if slowly, and this past week ? I had it off ? I went up 2.5 mg per day to present dose.

    SE history: The first 6-8 weeks it was hard to know what was SEs and what was my life. My situation has a few structural stresses in it, then my husband became very ill, I got the respiratory bug thingie that everyone got, it turned into bronchitis and triggered my normally dormant asthma. Things were a mess. I know I got really stupid from about 15-35 mg ? no short term memory at all. I had to write notes to myself if I went to the bathroom, because I?d forget what I was doing when I got bac. I work at home, and no way could I have gotten away with this if I was in an office situation. I have long-standing insomnia problems, but read about some people taking amiltryptaline (sp?) with their Bac. I had a very old supply of that that I had prescribed for chronic pain years ago. I take 5 mg a night and sleep better than I have in, well, forever. As I mentioned, my anxiety is well served by the Bac (I was diagnosed with post-traumatic stress after a disabling accident I had several years ago (by a psychologist, not a concerned friend or magazine article, BTW)). At this dose, I feel very well.

    Drinking on Bac history: As so many people here have noted, I felt a distinct difference from the first 5 mg. I was on 10 per day for a month, over Xmas, and although I gave myself permission to drink whatever I wanted, it turned out whatever I wanted wasn?t all that much. By 20 mg I was happy with a max. of 3 drinks, and AF days were effortless. When I was ?modding?, I had to be quite elaborate about AF days, taking myself out of my usual evening routine entirely. On Bac, I could sit on the (drinking) couch, watching the (drinking) TV, next to my (drinking) husband having a beer, and be fine with water. This was unprecedented! As of now, I?m good with one or none. :yougo:

    So there it is, friends. Pretty much due to the kindness of strangers, really. I couldn?t have done it without. Special shout out to Road and his unfailing support. Silly ads talk about ?Everyday heroes? when they are trying to sell us stuff, but Road truly is one, and not selling a thing :h. I?m very glad to be here.

    #2
    New, again. My thread

    Wow, fantastic story.

    Are you going to stay at that level for ever more or one day try to hit the switch and titrate down again?

    new again;1065982 wrote:
    Special shout out to Road and his unfailing support. Silly ads talk about ?Everyday heroes? when they are trying to sell us stuff, but Road truly is one, and not selling a thing :h.
    It warms the cockles of my heart to hear it. Big thumbs up to Road.

    The unexamined life is not worth living

    Comment


      #3
      New, again. My thread

      wow. thanks!

      If I ever write my story (which I will when I am at your point), I will surely try to follow your example (in terms of structure and level of information... wish I could follow your example in terms of success/dosing, but I'm at 250-270, so that train has left.)

      Also, I will have a hard time with the "everyday heroes" portion. I'll have to start a separate thread for that :h
      Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life... And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.

      Steve Jobs, Stanford Commencement Adress, 2005

      Comment


        #4
        New, again. My thread

        New,
        I too loved reading your story and aspire to reach your (and other's) successes.
        :goodjob:

        Comment


          #5
          New, again. My thread

          :welcome:
          Can't wait to get to know you!
          YAY you! for doing what it takes to get on the ride. I'm impressed.
          :l
          Karen/neva eva

          Comment


            #6
            New, again. My thread

            Wow, great post, welcome to the forum. A stylish entrance, if I may say so.

            I'm always amazed when reading these sort of posts, a whole life is in them. Especially the low dose "easy" solutions. Well done new, 10 points. And 10 points to Road.

            Comment


              #7
              New, again. My thread

              Murphyx;1066000 wrote: Wow, fantastic story.

              Are you going to stay at that level for ever more or one day try to hit the switch and titrate down again?
              Not really - my supply is very limited. I'm going to work with what I have, use the whole "tool kit" and take this opportunity as one that Goddess has offered me. I can go up a little more, stay on it for a while, and then I will have to go down to the 20 mg that my doc will agree to prescribe.

              beatle;1066026 wrote:

              If I ever write my story Oh, you WILL write your story, Beatle. There are too many here rooting for you. I've been reading your posts here (and in Holistic) for a year. You WILL succeed ! :l

              Ne/Neva Eva;1066054 wrote: :welcome:
              Can't wait to get to know you!
              I feel like such a weird stalker type person. I already feel like I DO know you.
              Scared yet? :H

              bleep;1066066 wrote:
              A stylish entrance, if I may say so.
              YES! STYLISH! THAT'S ME!
              Does a fancy twirl. Trips. Falls on face. What an embarrassing mess.

              bleep;1066066 wrote:
              Especially the low dose "easy" solutions.
              Yeah, well, we'll see about all of that. I have a habit of falling on my face.*
              *Please see above.

              Comment


                #8
                New, again. My thread

                new, it took me until about 300 posts to learn to multiple quote, so glad to see you aren't similarly constrained!

                You can always order more baclofen over the internet. A lot of the people you have quoted do only that to source their baclofen. Although at your low dose I suspect there won't be withdrawal issues, you still don't really want to run out of a drug that's done so much for you.

                Comment


                  #9
                  New, again. My thread

                  Not scared. Nope. not afraid at all. (nod to eminem, the poet/angry rapper/recovering junkie!)

                  I stalked a couple of people :blush: to the point of humiliation. I now call them friend. And I call them! who'd have thought???

                  There are ways to get you some bac if it comes to that and that's the way you want to go. In the meantime, carry on! you're off to a rock star start!
                  xx and oo
                  Karen/Ne

                  Comment


                    #10
                    New, again. My thread

                    new again;1066500 wrote:
                    YES! STYLISH! THAT'S ME!
                    Does a fancy twirl. Trips. Falls on face. What an embarrassing mess.
                    :H

                    Thanks for the belly laugh! Welcome to the forums, new. Though even w/out you saying so, it's obvious you've been here for awhile!! Glad you finally posted!
                    :goodjob: on getting enough bac from various sources to be able to get to where you're at now.
                    Better Living Through Chemistry

                    Switched at 180mgs of Baclofen on 1/31/11, and again on 10/8/11 at 200mgs.

                    Could've been a swan on a glassy lake, could've been a gull in a clipper's wake. Could've been a ladybug on a windchime, but she was born a dragonfly.
                    ~Clutch

                    Comment


                      #11
                      New, again. My thread

                      Yikes!! You've been around that long! I cringe when I wonder what you might think of me...

                      Anyway, better late than never. :welcome:
                      :nutso: I take pride in my humility :nutso:
                      :what?:
                      sigpic
                      Graph of My Drinking From July '09 to January '10

                      Consolidated Baclofen Information Thread




                      Baclofen for Alcoholism and Other Addictions
                      A Forum
                      Trolls need not apply

                      Comment


                        #12
                        New, again. My thread

                        Lo0p;1066535 wrote: I cringe when I wonder what you might think of me...
                        Mmmmmm...... poooooool booooooooy

                        Comment


                          #13
                          New, again. My thread

                          Oh. My. God.

                          :H

                          sister, I luuuuuv you. And um, you'll have to stand in line. And, sadly I think his dance card is full atm. Still, I'm sure he'll come bac and play if we're nice. or naughty. or something.

                          (And just so you know, apparently he talks/thinks too damn much. All that blah, blah, blah and he still has his damn clothes on. Are you kidding me?)
                          Love you lots, though epb.

                          New, how far are you from Chicago?

                          Comment


                            #14
                            New, again. My thread

                            435.61 miles
                            701.02 km
                            Over broken road...

                            Comment


                              #15
                              New, again. My thread

                              Two things to do for today:

                              1a) Baclofen is just weird! Like so many here, I have some very complicated things going on in my life. Some of the things, well, the only response is :shocked: Not so long ago, I would have dived straight to the bottom of a magnum of cheap white to escape (or just gone halfway, and suffered over not going the distance). Now, I just don't! Last night, I gave myself permission. I had a beer with dinner, and a very small glass of wine after. The really big surprise is that I didn't. Want. Any. More. !. Plus, the Bac is so good at calming me down, that I can just shrug at stuff and think "Not my problem". Unbelievable. Used to be, everything was my problem.

                              1b) I'm taking a course in Remote Sensing (don't ask), and have a Lab to do for tomorrow. I took a look this morning, and, OMG, I've done half of it. Couple of weeks ago. I have no recollection of having done it. But it looks real good. In fact, I don't fully understand how I got my results, but I'm sure they are correct! mg

                              1c) Some new SEs. Very stoned feeling towards late afternoon/evening, which is where I weight my doses. Not unpleasant. I also have been getting the brain zaps that Lady talks about. Also not unpleasant.
                              Overall conclusion? :boxer:

                              2) Full disclosure: My first foray into the online boozing scene was well over 1.5 years ago, when I found Sober Recovery Forum. I decided if quitting drinking made me like those unhappy souls, I would drink to excess forever. That's where I first encountered L0op and Crown86. It led me to TSM Forum and Road, which led me here. I posted for a while under the name Canadiangirl, mostly in mods. And I now realize that I can not
                              drink to excess and still be happy. Who knew?

                              Comment

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