New, again. My thread

[Murphyx]

New, again. My thread

new again;1067076 wrote: And I now realize that I can not drink to excess and still be happy. Who knew?

Yeah, crazy isn't it? Something really shitty happened to me today and I actually tried to get pissed, but failed miserably after half a glass of wine.

Baclofen is a strange, strange, strange, but also marvellous thing to have discovered.

Oh and BTW :goodjob: New Again. Great name.

[new again]

New, again. My thread

I?ve been largely off-line for a few days, and there?s so much catching up to do! Lots of new posters and new experiences. So this is my recent story:

Hubby has been having a nervous breakdown the past few months (major depressive episode is the new term for it, but I find it doesn?t convey the depth of the experience as well). Increasingly irrational and just weird. All because his ex (one of them) is re-opening the child support issue for the kid (there?s another kid by another mother, too), which she has every right to do. So, along with a bunch of really unflattering behaviour, he asks me last weekend, very agitated, if I thought threatening her might be a good idea. Of course, my line from the beginning has been ?fill out the paperwork and move on?. The ?threatening? he alluded to involved some nude photos that he ?used? to have (apparently no longer, but she doesn?t know that). I was all ?are you crazy? That?s illegal. That?s sexual blackmail. Are you crazy? Are you trying to make me crazy?? Well, I realized at some point that pictures like ?that? exit of myself. Blarg! Monday morning I find them where I expected to, in a lockbox behind a ceramic tile panel (for maintenance) on the Jacuzzi. Old-school polaroids. I flip through them idly, thinking ?dang, I was pretty, this was only 8 years ago?. When FUCK. In the middle of the pile there is a creased and HORRIBLY defaced one. X over the heart ? my heart ? and the face scratched out. With a Sharpie. I tested on another shot. It would take a huge amount of effort to do that much damage to a Polaroid with a Sharpie. Cue the mg

I?m so good at the second, third and fourth thoughts, that I can prevaricate for decades. 24 hours later, I get hold of my daughter. I meant to only ask about her knowledge of the lockbox and the possible destruction of any photos in the house. Of course I spilled the beans, and she reacted on my behalf. She was terrified. During the next few days I spoke to a few friends, a police constable, the university professor who employs me, etc. The looks of horror, and warnings for my safety, were unanimous. Apparently, I was not wrong to feel scared. On day two, I handed the photo to hubby and asked who did it and when. He was entirely expressionless. Denied the he had done it, showed no concern for my feelings or curiosity as to how I came to have the photo, expressed some vexation that I seemed to be accusing him, then asked what I wanted to do about dinner.

After that evening, he did not mention it again, and did not show any concern for my state of mind. 48 hours later I asked him to leave for an hour or two so that I could pack up the dog and cat, and some things. I?m staying (with the pets) in the basement of a friend that he doesn?t know.

All the interminable detail preceding is to underscore the following: I haven?t had a drink in days. Maybe 3 in the last 10. Last night my friend and her friend included me in a wonderful evening of lasagne and amazing conversation with large amounts of nice wine. Spanish and Chilean, I think. I didn?t want any, consumed about 2 oz. over the course of the evening. Possibly most important thing: A year or so ago, with the amount I was drinking, I may NOT have left the house at all. I may have been self-medicated to indifference. I may have not wanted to give up the option of getting shit-faced every night...

I dunno, don?t want to be all drama about this (I really don?t want this drama in my life at all), but Bac may have saved my life in a couple of different ways...?

[TracyA]

New, again. My thread

Wow, NA, what a story. It's terribly disturbing. I'm glad you are in a safe place now! Good for you. And double kudos for taking the critters. His behavior is beyond spooky.

Congrats on not drinking too. And I think you are right. Bac may have saved your life.

[bleep]

New, again. My thread

:wow:

It looks like you handled a disturbing scenario really well. Hubby, if it was him, seems a trifle disturbed. It reads like the plot to a movie, so I'm glad you got out of that situation unscathed and calm.

Pleasing to hear that it hasn't ruined your wa, to the degree that it could have. well done on coping so well.

Hopefully your situation resolves itself in a pleasant fashion soon.

[new again]

New, again. My thread

Thanks, Tracy and bleep. As sad as I feel right now, drinking isn't even an option. So there is good in this as well. Have to focus on the good...

TracyA;1070665 wrote: And double kudos for taking the critters.

Rule number one: always take the critters.

[bleep]

New, again. My thread

I'd say Rule # 1 would be hit the ground running as far and as fast away from phsycofreak as quickly as possible! What gets picked up on the way out is a bonus!

It's strange how baclofen removes the outlet of booze as an escape, even in situations where a "normal" person would be reaching for a stiff scotch.

[TooBrokeToCope]

New, again. My thread

bleep;1066514 wrote: new, it took me until about 300 posts to learn to multiple quote, so glad to see you aren't similarly constrained!

You can always order more baclofen over the internet. A lot of the people you have quoted do only that to source their baclofen. Although at your low dose I suspect there won't be withdrawal issues, you still don't really want to run out of a drug that's done so much for you.

Bleep- I'm interested in baclofen but very leary about ordering over the internet...do you know the safest place to order from?

[bleep]

New, again. My thread

Hi Cope,

There are a few threads, I'll dig one up for you. As off-putting as it sounds (prescription drugs over the internet? Are you mad?!), several of the members here have gone down this route successfully, so it does work. It's the slothliness of the medical profession in recognising this cure that forces us to behave like this.

There is nothing wrong with going this route.

Ah, here's the thread. Had to go back 12 pages to find it!

https://www.mywayout.org/community/f2...ine-35483.html

It's not even the thread I was looking for, but it has all the information. As to which one is best, hopefully one of the more experienced posters in this regard will step in. To my knowledge, all of them are ok, it's just cost and delivery times that vary.

Have you considered trying your doctor? You may be surprised. You probably won't, but you never know...

Good luck Cope - it's incredible what this can do for you, I urge you to try it.

[Ne/Neva Eva]

New, again. My thread

New Again.
Rule number one: Keep yourself safe.
glad you brought the critters, too. Mine defines me. But holy cow, woman. I'm so thankful that you were sober and in the moment when you made this discovery.

Who knows what the future holds in terms of your husband, etc... One thing is for sure, though. You'll never have to drink against your will again. And that means that you can use your considerable smarts/intuition/wisdom to maintain some sort of sanity amidst the chaos.
At least that's what I keep telling myself! (though my own situation is decidedly less frightening. I hope I'm not making light.)
And whatever, as to the distance. Hitchhike on a logging truck or something. October is 7 months away, if you start now you should be able to meet us!:H:H
Stay safe, my friend.
:h

[Ne/Neva Eva]

New, again. My thread

Too broke to cope.
I didn't want to order online either. Though I did and would take that in a heartbeat if it came to it.

There's another way. Hopefully someone will pm you the exact info. You can also search for the threads related to Dr. L.
Hang in there, it's real and it's worth the struggle to find it.

[new again]

New, again. My thread

Cope, welcome. I'm glad you found us. This place is a lifesaver.

[new again]

New, again. My thread

Ne, thanks so much for stopping by. It means a LOT!

[Ne/Neva Eva]

New, again. My thread

Morning!
Hope the day finds you safe and not freezing your a* off. Will the sun come up at some point???

I'm pretty sure you'll enjoy it more when it does. Safe, clear-eyed and with a goal. Stay close if you can.
Thinking of you.
Ne

[PbarE]

New, again. My thread

Excellent post, and I applaud your innovativeness in stockpiling bac. I love that "hard candy gift box" idea

Running out was truly my greatest fear. I will tell you what I did. It probably won't work in The Great White North, but it works in the U.S.

I went to two clinics (or as we call them "Docs-in-the-Box"). In my experience these places will write a scrip for 80 mgs with no questions. I asked them to write the scrip so I could get a three month supply at once for "insurance purposes". They did that without blinking an eye. I took each scrip to a different pharmacy, and all of a sudden I had over 14,000 mgs of bac. And then I found a doc who has been willing to write the scrip for me following Dr. A's protocol.

That is actually not illegal in my state, because bac is not a controlled substance. I would highly reccomend you research it in your state before trying it.

[Ne/Neva Eva]

New, again. My thread

Hey, New. Check in will you?