just got my own bac!

[Bruunhilde]

just got my own bac!

LOL Ru, then you'll love this story my mom always tells me - ever since I could toddle around, I would go outside and sit with the ants, and let them crawl all over my arms, and called them my friends. When we had to get in the car, I would have a tantrum unless I could bring my friends. And I did, but I would eat them en route to wherever. Some friends! I guess the poor kitty you swung (that makes me shiver to imagine gentle roo doing) was better off.

Okay, now I'm remembering some horrible stuff I did as a kid. I used to tie the dog to the sprinkler and turn it on thinking if she confronted her fears, she'd no longer be afraid of water. I think I got an evil thrill out of doing it, I used it to punish her. Poor thing. I also tied her to the red flyer to pull the cookie delivery load when I was a girlscout. What a sweet dog. I could have been so much better to her.

And then there were the Mudapie Bees. My friend and I would catch bees in a mason jar and add mud and shake them up, trying to gentle the bees because we wanted them to be nice and friendly so we could play with them. If you almost kill them, they gentle up nicely.

Sheesh.

[RudyB]

just got my own bac!

mom, sorry i didn't answer your call just now! i had to get going with my fingers, or my mind was gonna blow a gasket like an over-heated pressure cooker. (but that gives a too-strong impression.) anyway, i wanted to sit and write. so you'll read it here, and then you and i can fill in the gaps later, maybe when g is here and he can talk to you, too.

so, i'm sure you all might be wondering how it went in court today. well, here's how: whooopeeee! weeeehaaawww! thank you so much for your good vibes on the matter! i know they all helped and are still helping -as this thing is not over yet- but... just as i thought would happen, the judge counseled the ex to take my very generous offer. so that means he probably will. which means that i get my life back!!!! hip hip hooray! i won't say again what this all means, as i've detailed it ad infinitum already. suffice it to say -as you would imagine- i am PLEASED!

[Bruunhilde]

just got my own bac!

HOORAY! :yay::huggy May I be the first MWO'er to give you big hugs and CONGRATULATIONS!

[RudyB]

just got my own bac!

shit, bruun, those are some great stories!!!! holy craparola! it's good we're writing this stuff down. as lushie said to me once about a sentence i had written: 'therein lies your paragraph'.

[RudyB]

just got my own bac!

thanks, bruun!

i feel excited, but i also feel: 'of course it would turn out this way'. a bit anticlimatic of an attitude, yes, but accurate. but i'm still TOTALLY PSYCHED! lookit this, guys, i get to move on with my life! i get to pry this negative man from offa my back -he'll no longer leave his toiltries in my bathroom, or his coffee stains on the counter, his towel all scrunched up, his grumpy mood spewing shrapnel early in the morning- not ever, no more! ...starting very soon!

the universe doth provide!

amen.

[Isolde]

just got my own bac!

YAY!!! :yay::applaud:
That's awesome news, Roo!! :l

And thank you for reminding me about the Law of Attraction. I'd read up so much on it last year and then completely forgotten about it. Time to start taking a closer look at my thoughts, which have been too negative lately.

I am so glad that you will be getting your space back soon, and will also have more time to yourself. Now you can really move on.

Bruun, I feel the same way when I step on a snail by accident. I have always loved snails, and used to collect them in containers when I was kid - I'd put twigs and leaves in there for them to climb on, and then cover the bowl w/plastic wrap and poke holes in it. Oddly enough, as an adult, I LOVE escargot! :H I also had an affinity for lizards and grasshoppers (but only the little cute grasshoppers, not the big ugly ones).

Oh, I think we all did mean things to animals at some point or another when we were younger. I think I once threw one of our hamsters against the wall (probably with not too much force, I was maybe 4 or 5?). And I would sometimes point my finger at our dog and say with a low voice, "Bad girl!" for no reason, just because it always made her drop her head and put her tail between her legs. Thinking of those kinds of things now make me cringe. I treat my dogs like they're my children now.

There's more I want to respond to, but it's time to get some work done. I'll be back at home later.

[Bruunhilde]

just got my own bac!

Yeah, me three.

The only thing that bothers me about the law of attraction is that it feels greedy, and it feels fake, and that it blames people for their illnesses.

Are we all here because we were negative, more negative than the rest of the world that isn't addicted?

Are we more or less negative than cancer patients? If we have addiction and cancer, are we the absolute worst? My mom likes to blame people for their diseases, she's an RN. My cousin too. Also a nurse.

And I get it, to some extent that's right - I have metabolic syndrome because I drink because I am anxious/negative because I am stressed out because I don't have good coping skills and I need to think more positive thoughts ... but I know people who are much more negative and have no health issues at all.

Enough with the negative thinking - I DO need to stop the negative movies in my head and work at replacing them every day.

[ifulovelife2]

just got my own bac!

Happy days Rudy!

I was mean to my dogs as a kid. I used to feed one of my dogs carrots, which she loved, but every 3rd or 4th piece I would substitute a piece of orange peel and laugh like a drain at the look on her face. The other dog, who was a mean bugger, I would give beer to and blow hash smoke down his nose. He became much less mean after that...although he did used to run around a lot and fall over on his side with his legs still going at full gallop.

Children are dreadful creatures, quite disgusting. They should be banned.

[ifulovelife2]

just got my own bac!

Bruunhilde;1204861 wrote:
Enough with the negative thinking - I DO need to stop the negative movies in my head and work at replacing them every day.

You know what Bruun? And this may not help, but...I was hugely negative but have become a very positive person since I got sober.

Booze = neg thoughts as well as negative thoughts = boozeyness.

[Bruunhilde]

just got my own bac!

I know! I know! How did you quit again, oh right, I remember. I can't do that right now... but I'm trying. I find brushing my teeth helps.

[spacebebe01]

just got my own bac!

Good to hear things worked out for you Ruby

[ifulovelife2]

just got my own bac!

Bruunhilde;1204884 wrote: I know! I know! How did you quit again, oh right, I remember. I can't do that right now... but I'm trying. I find brushing my teeth helps.

Careful Bruun, we're meant to be an inclusive community but the above term is just going to confuse the Brits.

I know, you know, you know, yer know? Actually I do know, but any chance of trying again (obviously whilst remaining vigilant to the BP issue)? Say "shut up Brenda you silly bint" if it's an absolute no-chancer. :l

[Bruunhilde]

just got my own bac!

Yes, I've continued to think about it, but as my BP is high right now due to AL and bac together at around 50mg/day, I can't go higher without dropping off one or the other. I'm drinking less this week, but still haven't been AF. If I could go AF, I could go high on bac. However, if I could go AF, why would I need bac? Most people who achieved indifference, per my poor memory of reading MWO posts, did it while drinking because they couldn't stop drinking.

[spacebebe01]

just got my own bac!

If you went higher on bac would you still want to drink tho isnt that what indiference is, not wanting to drink. As Ive said Im AF now but I cant stay in the state Im in indefinately, I feel tormented, which is why I want to try bac again.

[Bruunhilde]

just got my own bac!

Space, I had to go down on bac before I hit indifference due to blood pressure being dangerously high.