just got my own bac!

[Isolde]

just got my own bac!

Bruunhilde;1193110 wrote: Hey Ru, Red, Is, Ne, G, Bam, everyone!

Is, so sorry about the panic attacks, YUCK. I swear by the gabapentin. Which reminds me, stupid River pharmacy who sold my personal info to all sorts of jerks pinging my email and phone now, still has not delivered on the RX so I'm almost out of bac and have about ten days of gabapentin. F'ers. Best go pursue that now.
I don't know if it's due to titrating down on the bac, or adding klonopin back in at night (just for the short term), but my anxiety is MUCH better. And considering all that I've got going on lately, that is amazing. Oddly enough though, I've seen gabapentin mentioned as something that is sometimes prescribed for what I am pretty sure I'm going to be diagnosed with, which has to deal with nerve over-sensitivity.

Bruunhilde;1193110 wrote:
Also, is bronchaid over the counter? I need some. I'm getting a chest xray due to shortness of breath next week. Also getting a sonogram on my left breast which has been bothering me for a few months. Mammogram showed nothing but I don't trust'em.

Yup, Bronkaid is available OTC. You just have to go to the pharmacy counter and ask for it. They'll ask for a copy of your license so they can track how much you buy to ensure you're not making meth in your garage.

Good luck with the sonogram, I hope everything comes out negative!! :l
When it comes to your health, you have to trust your intuition.

[Bruunhilde]

just got my own bac!

Thanks Is,

Okay, I know you'll have this answer. How about hypertension and Bronkaid? Do they go together like marriage and divorce?

[Isolde]

just got my own bac!

Bruunhilde;1193212 wrote: Thanks Is,

Okay, I know you'll have this answer. How about hypertension and Bronkaid? Do they go together like marriage and divorce?

Pretty much! One invariably follows the other! :H
I actually don't find that mine gets that much higher while on Bronkaid. Earlier this week, I took my bp at home in the morning and it was like 112/73 or somewheres around there. Ended up taking Bronkaid on the way to work (so around 8:30) because I was falling asleep while driving due to bac-related insomnia from the night before. I had a doctor's appt. later that day, probably around noon, and my bp came in at 120/80. So not much of a jump.
I'm getting back on the coconut oil, so hopefully will be able to stop taking my bp meds soon (or just take them every other day or every 2 days).

You could always give the Bronkaid a shot (it's about 13 bucks), and just monitor your bp while you're on it. I really don't feel like my heart is pounding out of my chest or anything like that after taking it.

[Bruunhilde]

just got my own bac!

You know, I would, thanks - but I can't find my damn monitor. Its swimming somewhere in the paperwork reefs in this home office of mine. It's hiding behind a bunch of old keyboards and file folders? I need an office intervention.

My BP is borderline high right now, due to my bad habit of Saphire martinis right now. However, all the other work I'm doing on my health is helping me feel like I'm gaining some control, so I expect to be able to cut back soon. I'm not doing near as much as I used to when I did the hard liquor six months ago tho, so that's an improvement.

[RudyB]

just got my own bac!

wowza, gals! so nice to see this tread jumping! thanks!

um, ne, maybe i didn't post it here, maybe it was an email, yes, it was, in which i said that maybe i'm simply not getting enough sleep! my son is already dreaming, and i'm close behind. gonna turn over a new leaf.

is, i'm sorry to say that i won't be with you at 160; i'm going to try 140 for a spell. hoping the cravings don't resurface, but if they do, it'll be bac up for me...

bronkaid rocks! wow! no nap today, and i DID get my grades in. and that nasty girl DID get a failing mark. but she WAS much better behaved this week. someone gave her a good talking to, and i know it wasn't her parents!

funniest story, just like the one i posted on bruun's thread about the mollies (the fish that 'disappeared' and i asked the pet store to refill my school, free of charge). two days ago i dropped my inhaler, it fell apart, and i couldn't get it back together. i jammed it up good, instead. called doc, got a refill, picked it up for $20. then, this morning, same exact thing happened! dropped it, jammed it. this time i called the pharmacy to see if they'd help me fix it. (i was SURE i was doing it right!) they said they wouldn't be able to, and insurance wouldn't pay for another. called insurance co, nope they wouldn't pay. took the manufacturer's number from them, called them, and they phoned in a free replacement to the pharmacy. lo and behold, when i un-jammed it (miracle!), i took a closer look and found that i was putting it in backwards!!! the right way, it slipped back in. durrr. another example of how the obvious can be oh-so-lost on little ol' me. makes a good story, though.

i'm really excited about 140! i already feel better. not thrumming or tingling or twitching, and made it through the day without a nap (out of necessity, and thanks to the bronkaid, to be sure, but encouraging nonetheless).

so much more to say and respond to, but i'll cut it short and be in bed soon! (famous last words.)

oh, red, i'm so glad you like the music. you and your girl have good taste! thanks, too, ginger for remarking. isn't that an excellent video?! (music is a GREAT way to learn a language -ask is's dad- and i've certainly learned a bunch of new words from my boyfriend.)

next time: cats and aa. remind me.

xo ru roo

[RudyB]

just got my own bac!

it's really striking just how obvious things are in retrospect. like with the inhaler: why didn't i even try to put it in the other way??!! i didn't even try, yet it obviously wasn't working my way! totally weird.

and the thing with the bac, which wasn't working amping up at night: the dreams, the hallucinations, the somnolence in the day, the night wakings. sure, toward the end i tried to get more pills in earlier, but usually with only a little success. but once i made even that little change, everything got better.

it is so clear to me now that i was chasing another horse in my behavior with the bac. i liked that sometimes-scary, stoned feeling. i sort of did it on purpose. now that i've gone down in mg's, and done a better job spacing my doses (which is much easier when there's only seven, not nine, pills to swallow), not only do i feel indifferent again, but i also don't get the highs, and nor do i miss them. well wouldja lookie there! bac works to take away the need to get high. it keeps its promise!

last night, before my nice, early 8:30 bedtime(!), i was reading 'in the rooms,' and the narrator was at an aa meeting, spying on a cute woman and looking for his favorite author. the woman sharing was talking about how she borrowed money from her ex in order to take her cat to the vet. 'now that was sober thinking!' she remarked. granted, much of our behavior while drinking alcoholically can be quickly traced back to the drink. but not all of it. her remark seemed decidedly silly. i love that, in my case, not everything was a function of being drunk. not even most of it. i love that i can get sober free of dogma and rules. (though, aa would give me a more active sober life, to be sure!) but too much of my life was affected by drink, and i am so glad i've stopped.

i'll be heading back to sleep soon, for some sweet, forgettable dreams...

xo and zzz,
rudy

[RudyB]

just got my own bac!

this one goes out to you and your daughter, red. (which one? the 3 yr old?) i'm just in from a run and i was listening to macaco. la prisa mata has never been my favorite song, but i gave it a full listen today and it's delightful! the brass section and the percussion son tremendos! anyway, it means 'speed kills.' and as i run along and listen to the lyrics ('las letras,' not 'los liricos,' my native speakers inform me), i have so much fun connecting what they say to our lives as recovering addicts, as sensitive people piecing together what makes sense. one day, i'll get quick at typing out -into two tables on word- the english and spanish, such that i can share them with you, and those who wish to can start to pick up the language (again). doing this will also be invaluable in my teaching; right now we are studying the art of translation (all of my own haphazard design, which is actually unfolding nicely), and using lyrics as our text. fun stuff! s'w'anyway, the link will do for now.

oh shootie pants, youtube doesn't have that one. this one's good too, and it has a nice, sexy video to go along. con la mano levanta' ~ with the hand in the air

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lkrqgCH0zho[/video]]MACACO. Con la mano levantá - YouTube

[RudyB]

just got my own bac!

quote from my nephew, who is four years old and was on wall street demonstrating last week:

'is this what democracy looks like?!'

[redhead77]

just got my own bac!

I like this song Ru! Could you believe my daughter (the three year old) isn't up yet to listen to it? It's almost 9:30 here. Just amazing. I'm ready to go check and make sure she's still breathing. But I'm pretty sure it's alright. She does this every once in a while.

[redhead77]

just got my own bac!

Bruunhilde;1193110 wrote:

Red, how do you get tested for dyslexia and other learning disorders? Also, is bronchaid over the counter? I need some. I'm getting a chest xray due to shortness of breath next week. Also getting a sonogram on my left breast which has been bothering me for a few months. Mammogram showed nothing but I don't trust'em.

The best way is to see a psychologist who has training in learning disorders or ADD, if that's what you're questioning. You'll be given a series of tests or questionaires. For learning disorders it's tests. My dyslexia was diagnosed early, by first grade, so I don't remember everything I was tested for. I do remember the exstensive intervention I had. My son just had over 6 hours of testing done for learning disorders. It showed he has ADD too. It's not mild, so I've put him on Concerta. It's doing wonders. I ran out for a few days and he was telling me how poorly he did on his tests on Friday. He said, Mom, I just couldn't focus. I asked him if he's noticed a difference with his 'pill' and he said YES. I want to keep taking it. His grades have improved enormously. With adult ADD, it could be as simple as taking a few questionaires with a shrinker or a psychologist. It just depends if you're already seeing someone.

[redhead77]

just got my own bac!

Oops, had to delete this center part. I think I said too much. Old habits die hard. Oops, came back and had to delete even more, because it doesn't make sense without the center part.

I hope you had a good row this morning Ru. I'm off to do things. My daughter is finally awake! The boys went off to shop with their aunt for my b-day present. Isn't that awesome? I'm glad you seem to be getting some sleep finally. Let us know how the drinking goes on the lower dose. I'm scared to lower mine.

Oops, now I really am off to do things, as I keep coming back here to delete! :H

[RudyB]

just got my own bac!

whatcha deletin' red? (silly question, i know, as obviously you don't want to share those parts. dag nab it!)

the race was a lot of waiting around and i couldn't stop thinking about things i'd rather be doing. but now that i'm home i don't want to do anything! rather down today, i am. (maybe pms?) i even tried to tempt myself to get ale on the way home, but it had no allure. phew! so far, so good on 140. it's day 3, so i'm hopeful.

[Isolde]

just got my own bac!

RudyB;1194074 wrote:
the race was a lot of waiting around and i couldn't stop thinking about things i'd rather be doing. but now that i'm home i don't want to do anything! rather down today, i am. (maybe pms?) i even tried to tempt myself to get ale on the way home, but it had no allure. phew! so far, so good on 140. it's day 3, so i'm hopeful.

I'm right there with you. I'm feeling a bit of the blahs today myself. You sounded like Yoda there, "rather down today, i am". :H
I know mine's not PMS related though. And in any case, I have backwards PMS. Mine has just been some sort of weird cycle over the past month and a half or so. I wish it would just GO for GOOD! I miss feeling good most of the time.

In any case, glad the ale held no allure! :goodjob:
I'm on day 3 of 160mg and still feeling indifferent as well. And I'm actually sleeping well, which is a blessing. I haven't had a drink (or the desire to have one) since the happy hour at the martini bar over a week ago! I think I'll be hanging out at 160 for awhile. So far, so good.

[redhead77]

just got my own bac!

RudyB;1194074 wrote: whatcha deletin' red? (silly question, i know, as obviously you don't want to share those parts. dag nab it!)

the race was a lot of waiting around and i couldn't stop thinking about things i'd rather be doing. but now that i'm home i don't want to do anything! rather down today, i am. (maybe pms?) i even tried to tempt myself to get ale on the way home, but it had no allure. phew! so far, so good on 140. it's day 3, so i'm hopeful.

I just wrote about Adderall, how much high school sucked (and how much weed I smoked in the end), and about the German-Italian lover I had in my youth. He helped my German far more than years of classes. We were distraught when he had to go home. It was nuttin really. The summary is better.

Feel better both of you gals. Spend the day chilaxin. :l

[RudyB]

just got my own bac!

thanks, gals. i'm just lying in bed while my son plays video games and my friend cleans my bathroom. (seems she's been at it for hours!!! guess it was pretty dirty.) i have a bag of winter clothes over there that i should find homes for, and tons more in the knee wall. ergh. i hate this stuff! stuff! i can't wait for bedtime!

oh, and the race, it was really short! 500 meters only! not worth it! and it was mostly highschoolers, so no dude-scoping. oh well. don't honestly know where i'd put a dude in my life at the moment! i'd need three more closets!

sure hope this is pms, which means it'll be gone tomorrow. either way, tomorrow is a new day.

xoxo ru