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The truth shall set you free(but first it shall piss you off)

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    #76
    The truth shall set you free(but first it shall piss you off)

    My turn for joke telling. I just got sent this from a friend who's considering tying the knot!


    A woman's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months,
    yet she stayed by his bedside every single day.

    One day, when he came to, he motioned for her to come nearer.
    As she sat by him, he whispered, his eyes full of tears, 'You know
    what? You have been with me all through the bad times.
    When I got fired, you were there to support me.
    When my business failed, you were there.
    When I got shot, you were by my side.
    When we lost the house, you stayed right here.
    When my health started failing, you were still by my side....
    You know what, Martha?'

    'What, dear?' she gently asked, smiling as her heart began to fill with warmth.

    'I'm beginning to think you're bad luck....'
    Started Baclofen 3/9/10 Hit my switch at 250mg on 21/11/10 Present maintenance dose of 50mg : started drinking after 1 year, upped dose to 80mg and stopped: Tapered to 30mg, started 6 months of drinking, upped dose to 240mg to stop 12/7/12

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      #77
      The truth shall set you free(but first it shall piss you off)

      Just eaten a curry and rice. Burp!
      Started Baclofen 3/9/10 Hit my switch at 250mg on 21/11/10 Present maintenance dose of 50mg : started drinking after 1 year, upped dose to 80mg and stopped: Tapered to 30mg, started 6 months of drinking, upped dose to 240mg to stop 12/7/12

      Comment


        #78
        The truth shall set you free(but first it shall piss you off)

        They don't have an "English" hear unless you count the embassy club. Maybe I should open one and make some money but then again my patriotism gets in the way. England excels better at other things. Maybe I'll open a conkers club.
        Started Baclofen 3/9/10 Hit my switch at 250mg on 21/11/10 Present maintenance dose of 50mg : started drinking after 1 year, upped dose to 80mg and stopped: Tapered to 30mg, started 6 months of drinking, upped dose to 240mg to stop 12/7/12

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          #79
          The truth shall set you free(but first it shall piss you off)

          There have bee a number of really excellent posts in this thread. None more so than this though:

          ignominious;1108104 wrote: My turn for joke telling. I just got sent this from a friend who's considering tying the knot!


          A woman's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months,
          yet she stayed by his bedside every single day.

          One day, when he came to, he motioned for her to come nearer.
          As she sat by him, he whispered, his eyes full of tears, 'You know
          what? You have been with me all through the bad times.
          When I got fired, you were there to support me.
          When my business failed, you were there.
          When I got shot, you were by my side.
          When we lost the house, you stayed right here.
          When my health started failing, you were still by my side....
          You know what, Martha?'

          'What, dear?' she gently asked, smiling as her heart began to fill with warmth.

          'I'm beginning to think you're bad luck....'

          Comment


            #80
            The truth shall set you free(but first it shall piss you off)

            In reponse to the opening post, this time last year I was highly active in the GD section. I got a lot of invaluable help from that section, not least from supporting other people. Helping others who were struggling reminded me why it was important I should not drink.

            Since I started Baclofen however I started to feel withdrawn, could not connect with people even in my personal life. I struggled to get along in the meds section but kept on "taking the pills" even though the way in which it affected me was making me feel absolutely terrible(basically it was actually worse than drinking!!!).

            Anyway I've now stopped using baclofen, apart from the odd tablet when I feel anxious or am having cravings - which actually isn't very often these days.

            So where to go from here?Well I would love to get back to being able to give support in the GD section, but at the moment I still don't feel I have the clarity. My brain is quite fogged still, don't know if it's the baclofen or something else. Now everyone will shout PAWS, yes there is that to consider BUT all that time I was sober last year and posting in GD I did not have this detached feeling. My time 'away' drinking and taking baclofen has been 4 months and I had reasonable AF periods (some of which is normal for me as a binge drinker) - and my drinking actually wasn't as severe as it has been for quite lengthy periods in the past.

            I haven't been clear of high dose Baclofen for long, but with each day I know I'm feeling more and more connected. So hopefully I'll be able to contribute properly in GD very soon.

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              #81
              The truth shall set you free(but first it shall piss you off)

              :H:H:H

              Nothing puts a damper on my sour mood and general malaise like a bunch of alkies with a sense of humor. To heck with you all. I was looking forward to carrying on with the perma-frown and will now have to do something else with my morning.

              If you really want to be in food-awe check out Martin-what's-his-name. Lo0p's exercise guru. Those men BRAG about eating a cow's worth of red meat and have pics to prove it. I almost went back to complete vegetarianism after looking at 'em.

              G'day or cheers or whatever you brits say. :goodjob:

              Comment


                #82
                The truth shall set you free(but first it shall piss you off)

                Ukblonde;1108195 wrote: So hopefully I'll be able to contribute properly in GD very soon.
                UK, IMO there is no "proper" way to contribute. I hope if you feel like posting, you will just post what you are thinking.

                DG
                Sobriety Date = 5/22/08
                Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07


                One day at a time.

                Comment


                  #83
                  The truth shall set you free(but first it shall piss you off)

                  UK, it's great to hear you are feeling better, and more so every day. Very clearly, baclofen was not the drug for you.

                  Comment


                    #84
                    The truth shall set you free(but first it shall piss you off)

                    Zenstyle;1108090 wrote: Frikken thing is enormous! And its making me hungry too. Can't understand why the guy isn't as fat as a pig... hell of a way to make a living really... eating shit loads!
                    He was on our local morning radio talk show a couple of years ago, and apparently, whenever he's not bingeing on 10 lb. omelettes, he eats very clean and healthy. Gotta balance it out, somehow! :H And while he might not be fat as a pig, he's got a pretty good barrell belly going on! Notice how he always wears those jackets.. ?
                    Better Living Through Chemistry

                    Switched at 180mgs of Baclofen on 1/31/11, and again on 10/8/11 at 200mgs.

                    Could've been a swan on a glassy lake, could've been a gull in a clipper's wake. Could've been a ladybug on a windchime, but she was born a dragonfly.
                    ~Clutch

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                      #85
                      The truth shall set you free(but first it shall piss you off)

                      Zen- You've totally turned this thread around! Good job- humor always wins out!
                      It's always YOUR choice!

                      Comment


                        #86
                        The truth shall set you free(but first it shall piss you off)

                        :creepydude: Hey am i in the right thread yis are all laughing :creepydude:















                        :H:H


                        :congratulatory: Clean & Sober since 13/01/2009 :congratulatory:

                        Until one is committed there is always hesitant thoughts.
                        I know enough to know that I don't know enough.

                        This signature has been typed in front of a live studio audience.

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                          #87
                          The truth shall set you free(but first it shall piss you off)

                          Zenstyle;1108409 wrote:
                          :eeks:Is that you zens :eeks:


                          :congratulatory: Clean & Sober since 13/01/2009 :congratulatory:

                          Until one is committed there is always hesitant thoughts.
                          I know enough to know that I don't know enough.

                          This signature has been typed in front of a live studio audience.

                          Comment


                            #88
                            The truth shall set you free(but first it shall piss you off)

                            Sheri;1107596 wrote: In all fairness to the folks in the meds section, there are plenty of members at MWO who never venture into other threads other than the ones they have chosen as their "home" threads to post on. I think for many of us, with our busy home and work lives, it's a matter of the amount of time we have in a given day, as well as the fact that many of us don't feel comfortable posting in other sections for whatever our personal reasons are.
                            Sums it up nicely. Come on Coalfire, if anyone should know this you should, it's basically; N?l aon tinte?in mar do thinteain f?in.

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                              #89
                              The truth shall set you free(but first it shall piss you off)

                              Whilst we are (OK, were ;-) on the subject of hospital jokes....

                              A woman has been in a coma for several months. One day, her husband reaches over to give her a loving kiss, and there is a barely perceptible murmur.

                              The doc notices this and says "I'll look away, but would you mind touching one of her breasts?" The hubby does this, and sure enough, there is a louder murmer.

                              "Fascinating!" says the doctor. "Again, I'll look away, but could you touch both breasts?" The man obliges, and his wife gives on a full on moan.

                              The doctor says "I know this sounds weird, but with the progress we're making here, I'd like to leave the room, and you can try oral sex". The man agrees and the doc leaves.

                              A few minutes later, the man comes out of his wife's room. "So?" says the doc "What happened?"

                              ..."She choked".

                              Paul- telling jokes in the best possible taste since 1974.

                              Comment


                                #90
                                The truth shall set you free(but first it shall piss you off)

                                LittleLessBoozin';1108448 wrote: Whilst we are (OK, were ;-) on the subject of hospital jokes....

                                A woman has been in a coma for several months. One day, her husband reaches over to give her a loving kiss, and there is a barely perceptible murmur.

                                The doc notices this and says "I'll look away, but would you mind touching one of her breasts?" The hubby does this, and sure enough, there is a louder murmer.

                                "Fascinating!" says the doctor. "Again, I'll look away, but could you touch both breasts?" The man obliges, and his wife gives on a full on moan.

                                The doctor says "I know this sounds weird, but with the progress we're making here, I'd like to leave the room, and you can try oral sex". The man agrees and the doc leaves.

                                A few minutes later, the man comes out of his wife's room. "So?" says the doc "What happened?"

                                ..."She choked".

                                Paul- telling jokes in the best possible taste since 1974.
                                If anyone can top that, I'll PayPal them $1. :H
                                :nutso: I take pride in my humility :nutso:
                                :what?:
                                sigpic
                                Graph of My Drinking From July '09 to January '10

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