My Baclofen Blog/Journal

[BacloTim]

My Baclofen Blog/Journal

Doing ok. OK Is good in my book

Up to 110mg/day now. Taking it slow because of side effects which I'm sure drinking has a part in. Still noticing my considerable decrease in alcohol consumption despite trying at all, somehow some alcohol survives into the next day which is RARE for me. This is what my doctor told me to do and it is working on it's own which has me baffled.

I'll have to make a blog update today as well. Now that things seem to be working i'm posting less that is all. I'm not doing bad by any means and I guess I better keep talking about successes instead of failures only.

[Ne/Neva Eva]

My Baclofen Blog/Journal

Hey, BTim!!! So glad to hear that you are doing so well. That was how I first noticed that something good was going on! I woke with less of a hangover and there was wine still in the glass! Soon there was wine in the glass and in the bottle! Then...well, when I stopped fighting the whole thing, I found I didn't really care about the wine after all. It's stranger than fiction, but very true!

Thanks for checking in, and you're right, it's good to hear the good and the bad and the ugly!

and :l
Ne

[BacloTim]

My Baclofen Blog/Journal

I'm up to 130mg now and taking it basically every 3 hours I think. My girlfriend is taking charge of the dosing schedule so not sure. We have a few alarms that go off and I take my meds that is all.

I still don't have any AF days but nothing crazy is happening like before. Sometimes when I'd get into arguments about things I thought it was that I was drunk and must have been wrong but lately I see that some people are just assholes and that is ok Basically I don't argue anymore even if drunk which is a pretty huge thing. I can't sleep or meditate if I have arguments on my mind. I think it's a character weakness I feel I always have to be right about everything which is pretty f'd up.

I do spend a hell of a lot of time on researching things at an obsessive level than no normal person would do so that is probably why. I probably have to get over my obsessive thoughts as well. Right now I can study 1 topic for a a year straight at many hours a day no problem and have fun doing it. It's just what I do and it isn't normal I think, I have always drank and read be it books or the internet so it is a learned routine.

I just want to be normal if that makes any sense. My mind races over so many topics that it is just out of control. I am hoping the Baclofen will slow things down eventually. At this dose I feel no drowsiness whatsoever. As I've said in other threads i've been diagnosed as Schizoaffective but my faith in the medical field is very low right now and the meds they give for this type of thing just don't work too well or give you many problems. I think they just don't know what the hell I am and I won't fit into the square peg so i'm crazy or something.

This was a bit of a rant but it feels good to get it out!

Thanks guys!

[Bruunhilde]

My Baclofen Blog/Journal

:goodjob:
Hi Tim! Rant away, vent your feelings, it's all okay!

My mind races alot and I do alot of reading and researching too. I don't think you're abnormal, I think alot of alcoholics/addicts are this way. I always wanted to be the type that could "hang loose" and not worry or be anxious but that is not my lot in life. Yet. I will say it's easier to be AF than hung over and my feelings are easier to manage. My mood is better. Maybe when you get to a couple of AF days you'll start feeling more in control. It sounds like you're already on your way. Hang in there!

[Zephra]

My Baclofen Blog/Journal

God Tim, You are describing me. The obsessive research and thought. I should be working and all I do is pick a topic and research it to death. Just wanted to let you know your not the only one. Z

[bleep]

My Baclofen Blog/Journal

Provided you girlfriend is on the ball, that sounds good Tim. Don't panic about AF days, they will come in time. The argumentative side of you taking a back seat sounds like a positive step, Ignominuous reported a similar sensation.

And we all want to be normal. This is a step in the right direction, so take heart.

[BacloTim]

My Baclofen Blog/Journal

Hey guys I think some of you may know that I was going through a VERY rough patch. The relationship thing is ending for real but I'm changing things in my life that I need to change and that was just part of it. As I drank less or well the Baclofen caused the alcohol to not work the same I started thinking about life and where I want to go.

I am at 170mg and I think now I can take or leave alcohol but I still have atleast a beer a day out of habit more than anything. I did have some med issues but that was partly my fault since I wanted to ramp up too fast due to depression. I had like a manic state for a bit but I think i'm getting over it. At least I am happy right now even if not sleeping really, I am eating again though!

Anyway just wanted to give an update. I think the Baclofen will work, it is just rough going at first.

Love and Peace!

[Ne/Neva Eva]

My Baclofen Blog/Journal

I'm glad you're focused and following through on what is best for you. That's tough, but positive.

Look for the place when the booze just isn't good anymore. Actively look for it! It's a lovely place, and I think I drank through it a time or two...
Glad you're eating, hope you get some real sleep very soon, and that you stay focused on the goal, BTim.
Baclofen will work. You can count on it.

[RudyB]

My Baclofen Blog/Journal

good luck, tim. and you'll be fine without the gf, i'm hoping. just make sure she teaches you about dosing, if necessary, before she goes! (though with all of your brains, it's probably a no-brainer.) great to hear that beer is going. soon it will be gone. take ne's advice and look for that place where it's not welcome, that place IN YOU that says no thanks; it's easy to override it with habit. keep us posted.

[bleep]

My Baclofen Blog/Journal

Good to hear Tim. Keep going, as Ne says - there's a big difference between where you are and where you can be!

[SlipperyPete]

My Baclofen Blog/Journal

Glad to hear you're in a better place Tim, although I still won't forgive you for leaving the crew :H

What did you name us?

[BacloTim]

My Baclofen Blog/Journal

haha I forget the crew name but i'm still a part! I think in my case I wasn't just an alcoholic but treating some serious depression with alcohol. I've just got a new place now and am focused back on work with a passion again. I think this is just what I needed, a fresh start on life. I think the Baclofen has helped a lot but also the changes in my life. Oh and I had my first AF day today will probably be another but an old designer friend wants to get together today over a few beers and I may do that but at least that is healthy drinking. I just don't have the obsession anymore.

I think I'll still keep going up on the Baclofen though just in case it is the only thing causing this change. The Welbutrin has been a AWESOME addition to the Baclofen for me, my depression is totally lifted though I didn't sleep for a few days when starting it. Last night I slept great after a wonderful phone conversation. I think part of the insomnia was due to stress.

Anyway if it is just the Baclofen doing this well it works! I have no interests in drugs of any type and remember I was a hardcore junkie.

It will work if you make changes and keep dosing past the uncomfortable parts I think. It's too early to say i'm cured but it seems possible that I can get there now. I don't know my whole life view has changed some how.

I'll keep posting to let you all know even if it's just positive stuff

[Ne/Neva Eva]

My Baclofen Blog/Journal

BacloTim;1162972 wrote: ... I think in my case I wasn't just an alcoholic but treating some serious depression with alcohol.
...
I'll keep posting to let you all know even if it's just positive stuff

How do you define alcoholic, Tim?

The positive stuff is what keeps us all going.

[RudyB]

My Baclofen Blog/Journal

great stuff tim! keep posting! i thought once upon a time that i'd stop posting on my thread cause i only had happy stuff to report. but reporting it was so satisfying! and crappy stuff crept/creeps in from time to time, and it's nice to have a place to shed that, too.

[bleep]

My Baclofen Blog/Journal

Positive stuff is great, please bring it on!

And well done on the AF time. Let's see more of them!