God help me I'm on a bender

[Guitarista]

God help me I'm on a bender

Hi Jo,

Just wondering how you're going?

G-bloke.

[Murphyx]

God help me I'm on a bender

I'm confused. It's pissing it down here. Aren't I meant to be living in a desert?

Western Australia. It's mid winter now, so the temperature will be down to what? About 30c? :H

[Jo80]

God help me I'm on a bender

Ha ha 30c i wish! Its 17 here and miserable.

Oh why oh why do i do this to myself, i really must be insane. The guilt, self loathing and the hangover are killing me.

It's nice to come here and share though and reading the posts from the successful people and the people making progress does help me to feel a glimmer of hope.

[christyacc]

God help me I'm on a bender

Jo80;1136624 wrote: Ha ha 30c i wish! Its 17 here and miserable.

Oh why oh why do i do this to myself, i really must be insane. The guilt, self loathing and the hangover are killing me.

It's nice to come here and share though and reading the posts from the successful people and the people making progress does help me to feel a glimmer of hope.

It is 17 and miserable today here as well. I had plans of chillaxing by the pool ths afternoon as I pretty much have the entire day to myself....and well, no dice....dreary. So much for summer.....

On another note, Jo, I know how you feel of the self-loathing, hangover, etc..... have had the odd glimmer of hope but mostly just drinking......I hope to string a few days of 'hope glimmer' days so I can start to feel good about myself again.....and have my family believe in me again.....

[Ne/Neva Eva]

God help me I'm on a bender

17! Holy cow, people. I thought it was the summertime. I hope you're keeping warm.*

Washington is indeed the center of the world. Not the dreary, rainy one that can see mountains. (so what? We've got mountains around here somewhere!) And sunshine! What we don't have is salmon. Wild. In our rivers and ocean.

We should move.


*since silliness doesn't translate, and the last time I was sarcastic on here, people misconstrued that I was serious, I have to point out that I am, in fact, joking. In as many words as possible. I was playing on the perception that Americans don't really know anything about anything outside of our borders, you see. Isn't that funny?

[Ne/Neva Eva]

God help me I'm on a bender

Ms. Jo. I hope you're feeling better. The only thing worse than the hangover is the way the hangover can make me feel about myself. Hang in, sister, it gets better and you're doing the right thing!

Are you taking campral and Nal?

:l
Ne

[6to10pm]

God help me I'm on a bender

Thank you all for your support! I love this forum! It has helped me so much over the past several weeks. I kept a running spread sheet on everything from number of drinks, meds, dosages, sleep patterns, anxiety levels, vitamins. I have started to put all of the information on to a blog to make it easier for me and others to read. Its a work in progress... so bear with me.

Its my raw thoughts and feelings. I cant believe I have been able to reduce my drinking as much as I have. I actually woke up this morning and thought ..... "its not as much fun as it use to be"... which is a huge fucking change of thought for me. As others has said... "how you think" is half the battle.

Everyone here is so supportive! Love it. It reminds me of being in rehab Nothing you say, write or think ....is something that WE have not thought about at one time or another.

here is a link to my daily thoughts of nonsense blog. The title .... are my witching hours ....
6to10pm.

6to10pm: rehab

[RudyB]

God help me I'm on a bender

awesome, jo! great idea about the blog. i'll check it out when i get tired of waiting for people to mosey over and respond to my nonsense-filled thread of my own strange and twistish version of this here journey we're on together.

it's between 6 and 10 pm, and i'm as sober as a teetoatling judge. thank you bac and bacster comrades!

[Jo80]

God help me I'm on a bender

Great 6, i will be sure to check out your blog. I have tried spreadsheeting etc but i always stop when the numbers scare me so it become a pointless exercise. I like the name 6to10, mine would be more like 4to4 :upset:

Ne i am on campral and naltrexone, would be interested to know if you have ever tried either or both. I have only been on the campral for about 3 weeks so i don't really think i have given it a fair go, but i am seeing my doc tomorrow and have been reading so much good stuff about bac (althought the side effects really scare me so i dont think i would take it if it wasn't prescribed) so i don't know if i should try and get the bac tomorrow or give the campral a bit more of a go.

I would love it if anyone could shed some light on a question I have about naltrexone...i have been taking it around 4 months, initially one in the morning only, now one in morning and one at lunch. This is the way my doc told me to take it and its obviously quite different to TSM. Wondering if anyone has any suggestions as to whether i could switch to taking it an hour before and see if it works any better, or would it be better to stop for a while before starting TSM. Sorry i know your not docs just hoping for ideas!

I am planning to read an eBook today, either The Cure for Alcoholism or Heal Thyself.....don't know which way to go.

:thanks: xx

[Jo80]

God help me I'm on a bender

PS...

Sorry for all the questions, i feel like i am desperate for everyone's knowledge and offering little to the forum myself.

I promise when i know more and am in a better place i will give it all back to the community :hug:

[Rusty]

God help me I'm on a bender

Hi Jo,

For Naltrexone, you're supposed to take it one hour before the time you usually drink. I don't want to incorrectly assume here, but is your doc having you take it twice a day because your drinking is an all day event? When I was on it, I would take it right before the end of my work day....an hour before "the witching hour" set in. I am AF because of Baclofen. Baclofen is great for anxiety and keeps AL cravings from consuming your thoughts at a certain type of day. Keep reading and posting....this is a wonderful place..

Campral did nothing for me but giving me embarrassing GI side effects. Uh, who needs that? I have to hold down a job!:H

[Jo80]

God help me I'm on a bender

Hi Rusty,

Thanks for the reply. I very rarely drink all day. I work during the week, but my work is based from home so i most often dont have to worry about hiding the hangovers. I try, and mostly succeed not to have a drink before 4. Fridays can get dodgy if i don't have any appointments to keep, especially after a big Thursday night.

Anyway, when i started nal my doctor asked what time i usually have my first drink and when i told him 4 he said take it at 12. Anyway after a honeymoon period i started thinking about having a drink at 10 in the morning, which was totally new for me, so he got me to add another one on waking.

Make sense? I confuse myself most of the time!

[kaza]

God help me I'm on a bender

Hi Jo80
This gossipy chick is just checkin out the posts. Congratulations on approaching a new day AF, it will definitely all get better, PROMISE, we all have to start somewhere and from little tiny baby steps we get better and better and gain more confidence in our day to day doings. Great posts ahead of me -how are you coping with Nal and Campral together. I am on Nal only, curious to know why you are on both - scuse me ignorance but thought they both were the same sort of medication so would love to hear more. I love all posts on this site, but I find G-bloke very inspiring and look forward to the posts. So Jo keep posting, talking, reading, listening - it is all good here and will be of great benefit. We are so lucky to have found this site. It is non judgmental, and is only caring, friendly and helpful to the max. Hang in there. Take care of yourself. Love and Sunshine Kaza x

[Ne/Neva Eva]

God help me I'm on a bender

Hiya, Kaza. Always nice to see a fresh, um, name. Guitarista is such an inspiration. I wonder if he knows?

I haven't taken anything other than bac, Jo. I know a little bit about Nal. The way to take it is hotly (or not!) debated. ukblonde was having some really good success with it. (Where is she I wonder?)
I'm not a fan of campral, but that has a lot to do with what I read in Dr. OA's book. Subsequent reading brought me to the conclusion that it wasn't for me. Lots of doctors prefer it though.

Heal Thyself and The End of My Addiction are one and the same. The former is simply a later edition. Wish the guy would put pen to paper again, for crying out loud.

Anyhoo. Glad you're posting. It helped me a great deal to hang out here.

Take good care.
:l
Ne

[JackieClaire]

God help me I'm on a bender

Hi Ne,

Got a text from UKB and she's away from the boards for a bit. can you pass that on if anyone's wondering where she's got to. She'll back bright and bushy tailed next week.

J x
:l