Here goes - Bottlestopper's Baclofen journal

[bottlestopper]

Bottlestopper - the name. Well it is plain and simple I have to stop hitting the bottle. I have been drinking for about 30 years, for the most part of it (at least the last 15) every night unless I was too ill from a hangover. I have embarassed myself and my family on far too many occassions. I have woke up at least once a week with that "oh my god, what did i do and say last night" feeling and too scared to ask. All along, I have known I had a problem, but really could not face the thought of never having another drink. Wine has been my constant friend and companion, always there to help me when I was low, celebrate any achievements, drown my sorrows etc. I have been full of anxiety nearly all of my adult life, but over the past 4 years it has become crippling to the stage where for the most part, it NEVER goes away. Often for no particular reason it is there and at the first sign of stress it escalates to the stage where it is crippling.

Through all of this I managed to keep a brave face (nearly always) and pretended there was nothing wrong. I was hiding bottles, drinking alone and feeling more and more anxious. However, every morning I would tell myself that today I wouldnt drink. Get to wine o'clock and bang the story starts all over again. The anxiety during the day would increase, and increase and the only respite from it for a few blissful hours was the wine. It would take the edge off, but only to make it worse the next day.

I knew I had a serious drink problem, I am addicted to alcohol (I dont like the label - alcoholic) and have tried many things before, topimax (did 30 days AF, with the help of antabuse, but i was so ill and hated every minute of it feeling deprived at every bit of the way), naltrexone, but got bored waiting and I wanted the buzz from the alcohol and that took it away, and one effort with baclofen, for a few weeks but I had started a new job and the memory loss and brain fog was crippling I felt I had to stop.

Well about 4 weeks ago, I started taking baclofen again. I am a teacher and knowing I was on holiday for 6 weeks I want to get this thing cracked before I go back in 4 weeks time. I didnt tell anyone just started taking it. Had a very busy holiday week with family here, drinking lots and lots every night whilst titrating up. ON the last night of the holiday I exploded, couldnt stop crying (there was a programme on the TV about liver disease and I knew that was so close to being me), I explained to my sister my crippling anxiety and how I couldnt get through the evening without a bottle of wine or two and that it was the only way I could stop the anxiety. My husband came in and quite bluntly said "No it is the alcohol that is causing the anxiety, not the other way round. If you dont stop you will die!" As simple as that.

I made a commitment that night to stop. I am on day 4 AF. I dont know at this stage whether I will be able to have the odd glass of wine in the future with the help of baclofen, I still cant imagine never having a drink, but hopefully that will come later on.

I am on 120mg of baclofen per day, and last night I really didnt feel any cravings, even when hubby had a glass. My first sober Friday night in very many years.

However, the side effects have been OK, but I dont think i would be able to work on them. I have a lot of studying to do over the summer, I have a new subject to teach in September, and my attention span is shocking. I find myself forgetting what I am saying, forgetting what I have gone into a room for, even forgetting whether I have taken my tablets (and I have an alarm set on my phone). I have constant brain fog, and I am really worried about going back to work.

I also get twitching eyelids from time to time?

Does this brain fog diminish over time? I am a heavy girl and I worked out from Dr A's schedule I might need 330mg. I really would like to get this thing cracked before I go back. Do i increase my dosage quicker to get there or not?

Any help would be very much appreciated.

Here's looking forward to an AF Saturday.

[Tiny]

Here goes - Bottlestopper's Baclofen journal

I'm with you

I have been a member for a while but had a major relapse and can't snap out oif it. I have similar anxiety issues -- and after reading Amniesan's book I realize that the anxiety has been a long part of who I am -- at one point I relieved myself with food. Then came the antidepressants. Funny I did not start drinking heavily until AFTER the AD.

Anyway I am on week 3 of Baclofen and am at 80 right now. I did a major binge when I travelled recently and realize that air travel (at least right now) is out the question.
I can't stop beating myself up b/c what was supposed to be a fun trip to catch up with old friends turned into me cancelling plans and staying in my hotel room -- it was a nice hotel if that's any concellation. But, I isolated myself. NOT COOL.

So, I am happy to be your bac buddy. I have not had brain fog. One thing I do on a consistent basis is take supplements. I also think that there is a correlation between hypoglycemia and alcoholism. Protien is important. I think bac is a tool but there needs to be an approach that addresses all the issues. PM me if you prefer.

Best of luck!

[ik1966]

Here goes - Bottlestopper's Baclofen journal

hi tiny, had the same problem with the ad i always had a stop after taking ad's i started binging i beleive it plays a big role there are even article written about that if you google you find it
i am taking baclofen and it helps very well...
:welcome:

[bleep]

Here goes - Bottlestopper's Baclofen journal

Hi Stopper, and welcome.

All the SE's will disappear in time, once you stop titrating. It's the titrating that seems to cause many of them, once you can sit at a level, they'll fade (except the sleep ones). That's been my experience, anyway.

Unfortunately, at the time OA wrote the book, weight was the only thing he tied dosage to. Not unreasonably so, but it turns out to be totally irrelevant to what dose you'll need to go up to. We've yet to work out what the determining factors are, so far it seems to be entirely random.

You sound like you may be close anyway, if cravings aren't an issue. How long have you been on 120mg's? At a guess, about 8 to 10 days? Without knowing your titration schedule to date, it's tricky to say speed up, but a month to 120mg's sounds like you could go quicker. It won't help the SE's, but you will get there sooner.

Something that I found that helps the SE's is to split your dose up more. Try that and see if it helps. The brain fog can be pretty pervasive, but the other ones might lessen.

Congratulations on 4 days! That will help the SE's tremendously, as I'm sure you have already noticed. Keep it up, there is light at the end of the tunnel, at long, long last.

[bleep]

Here goes - Bottlestopper's Baclofen journal

A couple of things I forgot to say:

How are you finding your anxiety with baclofen? Is it helping?

Also, at this point, I wouldn't think about abstinence or moderation. Just do what you are doing, and cross that bridge later.

Have you tried Piracetam? It's a nootropic that people report helps considerably with the fog.
Best of luck.

Welcome to baclofen Tiny. I believe you are 100% right about baclofen being a tool. For me, it was THE tool, but there's more to this than simply drinking too much too often. Baclofen can sort that bit out, but the rest also needs some serious attention. It's much easier to address the other stuff when you aren't constantly pissed or hungover though!

[bottlestopper]

Here goes - Bottlestopper's Baclofen journal

hi tiny, I would love to be your baclofen buddy that would be cool to have someone who is at a similar stage to me. I have agree with your suggestion about hypoglycaemia and alcohol. I have also stopped all sugar and wheat at the same time and now on day 5, I am feeling much better, not as hungry and more myself. However, I do have a stinking cold which doesnt help at all. I am also trying to eat something every two hours, piece of fruit, a few nuts to stop my blood sugar dropping to far.

Bleeep - thanks for the advice. My titration schedule has been a bit up and down really and I havent kept a diary of it, hence the start of this thread to ensure I do. I started on 10mg 3 tines a day, have gone up about every 3/5 days by 20mg. Stayed at 100mg for a while been on 120 for 4 days split over 4 doses, thinking of going up to 140 tomorrow??Should I do this over 5 or 6 doses will this help? Any suggestions from here, sort of prefer the SE's now if I can get this all over with and back on a level before I go back to work. That is so important because I cant have this brain fog when back at work. Will look into the piracetem, is it a prescription drug? I am doing this alone without the help of a doctor.

I am really confident that I will make it through today and the rest of the weekend, first sober weekend in a very long time - yay!!

thanks for your help and support everyone, couldnt do it without this forum

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Here goes - Bottlestopper's Baclofen journal

:welcome:!

Just a flyby from me... Looking forward to hearing more!


Ne

[bottlestopper]

Here goes - Bottlestopper's Baclofen journal

Thanks Ne

Bleep - my anxiety is greatly reduced, I hardly ever have that overwhelming feeling anymore. I still feel the thoughts running through my head and the panic in my brain, but I dont feel the physical sensations that normally go with it - its lovely to be free from that.

Does this mean I am more or less likely to hit the switch with baclofen, or is there no correlation?

I dont really want a drink, not bothered really, but I do still think about alcohol ALL the time, far more than I did before. Every time I see an advert or a TV program where people are drinking I notice it. I think about future times and worry about how i will feel without alcohol, but I dont physically crave it as much. Does this make sense?

Anyone else get the eye twitch, it is really annoying.

[bleep]

Here goes - Bottlestopper's Baclofen journal

The eye twitching is pretty common. IT'll stop after a while, as will most of the SE's.

We still aren't sure exactly how baclofen works, or why, but it does seem that if anxiety is your primary motivation for drinking, then baclofen is the perfect solution, so that bodes well for you. Unfortunately, at this point, it's all still guesswork though.

I think it's only natural to think about drinking, a lot, even after you don't crave it. It has been a part of your life for so long, that to expect anything different is madness. That will get better with time, at least it is for me. I remember almost obsessing over booze after reaching indifference, and it worried me. But it's a conscious cognitive process, not the old irrational urge to drink, that's the difference, and it's key, I think. For the first time, it's THINKING about drinking, not just thinking drink, drink, drink. Do you get what I'm saying? I'm not feeling very eloquent here!

And don't panic about future social engagements. What'll happen there will happen. You'll be in a different headspace regarding booze by then, so decide then.

[bottlestopper]

Here goes - Bottlestopper's Baclofen journal

Feeling pretty rubbish today. got a severe throat infection and chest infection cant get to the docs until tomorrrow and had an awful night sleep. At one point I remember waking up and thinking "I think I preferred it when I was drinking" how absurd. I was actually saying that I preferred the feeling ill through self inflicted means rather than through genuine illness. As if drinking would have stopped me from being ill. Come on!!!

I abruptly told myself that if I had have been drinking I would still be feeling ill, but even worse because I would have been suffering with a hangover and feelings of guilt as well. See that told you, you alcohol monster!!!

Staying at 120 for today. Side effects are still there. Seeing some somnolence and brain fog still, but not sure if that is also worse because I feel so ill.

Really want to titrate up quickly though I must get rid of this brain fog before I go back to work. Anyone got any advise on a quicker titration schedule please? I have also heard that some people get less side efffects as they titrate higher, any one help?

Well day 6 for me. Nearly at the end of my first AF weekend in many years - yay!

Day 6 AF, wheat free, sugar free
120 mg baclofen
15stone 8lb

[tiptronic_ct]

Here goes - Bottlestopper's Baclofen journal

Hang in there BStopper

And as Bleep said: your relatioship with AL will change. I fretted endlessly initially. Avoided social situations or left early. These days, it's as simple as pie. Just focus on getting well for now.

[SlipperyPete]

Here goes - Bottlestopper's Baclofen journal

Hey dude,

You say you're splitting that up over 4 doses? This is where you should listen to bleep: he's a jeen-yus. Split it up over 6 doses at least for now. I'm chilling at 120 and I take 20 mg's 6x per day, and that got rid of all drowsiness and whatnot. I tried going back to 30mg 4x per day, and an hour after the 2nd dose I was comatose on my bed. Split it up!

[Getting There]

Here goes - Bottlestopper's Baclofen journal

Hi Stopper. Your story sounds very similar to mine so I can relate. I too was having 1 or more bottles of wine daily and had very high anxiety. Have been AF for 16 days. On BAC since day 7. Now at 50mgs per day ready to move up to 70. Congrats on day 6! Every one matters. I loved tiny's idea about being BAC oven buddies. Would like to join you. The SE' are a bit annoying. I have a very stressful job where I must be "on" 100% of the time and last week I had all I could do to stay awake during a meeting. I have a hard time driving long distances as well. I am doing okay other than that. Even though I may not be 100% at work I keep telling myself that doing this is more important than any job. This is my life and i don't plan on giving it up to AL. My anxiety has gotten much better on BAC. My family is even noticing how much calmer and happier I seem. It is such a relief to have that ease up a bit.

[Tiny]

Here goes - Bottlestopper's Baclofen journal

touching bac base

Hi friends,

I am up to 100 and starting July 19th -- with an awful 3 day binge at the end of the month. I think I tried to take on too much. I too divide my doses to several a day. I bought a pill container and my loving husband helps me stay on track. Once I spiral down and the racing thoughts begin I become a different person. I am trying to work out some past family trauma and at age 43 I realize that I kept myself busy to not address these matters. I finally quit a very stressful job -- I have always been highly successful at work but after 20 years in high level administration I literally burnt out.

So my question for all is why did we drink in the first place -- what was out of balance? I had a tendency to overachieve at work, continue going to grad. school, etc. Support is important -- I too have isolated myself at times and if I did not have such a supportive husband (we've been married now for 3 years) I would be dead or in prison.

I am working on some depression and anxiety workbooks and am trying to change my way of thinking. Any additonal suggestions from folks are so welcome!

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Here goes - Bottlestopper's Baclofen journal

bottlestopper;1159641 wrote: Feeling pretty rubbish today. got a severe throat infection and chest infection cant get to the docs until tomorrrow and had an awful night sleep. At one point I remember waking up and thinking "I think I preferred it when I was drinking" how absurd. I was actually saying that I preferred the feeling ill through self inflicted means rather than through genuine illness. As if drinking would have stopped me from being ill. Come on!!!

I abruptly told myself that if I had have been drinking I would still be feeling ill, but even worse because I would have been suffering with a hangover and feelings of guilt as well. See that told you, you alcohol monster!!!

Staying at 120 for today. Side effects are still there. Seeing some somnolence and brain fog still, but not sure if that is also worse because I feel so ill.

Really want to titrate up quickly though I must get rid of this brain fog before I go back to work. Anyone got any advise on a quicker titration schedule please? I have also heard that some people get less side efffects as they titrate higher, any one help?

Well day 6 for me. Nearly at the end of my first AF weekend in many years - yay!

Day 6 AF, wheat free, sugar free
120 mg baclofen
15stone 8lb

Dude. 6 days? 120mg? hmmm. That's an awful lot of bac in a very short amount of time. With (very) few exceptions I haven't met anyone around here that has had lasting success with super-quick titration. just sayin, my friend... take it for what it's worth! I'm not trying to be Debbie Downer, just trying to give a little help.

Either way, it's not conducive to getting rid of brain fog to go up! up! up! imho. :H I experienced fewer physical SEs going up, for the most part.

Congrats on the AF weekend and booya! That's awesome.

The infection may be exacerbated by the bac, btw. It can cause nasal congestion, and therefore post-nasal-drip. Very common SE at low doses and even noted on the info sheet with a RX. Taking something to alleviate that (I use allergy meds) should really help in terms of the symptoms even before you get on antibiotics for the infection.

Cheers!
Ne