Hoping this is the start of my journey to freedom

[RudyB]

Hoping this is the start of my journey to freedom

oh my god, jimmy! this is so GREAT! i am happy for you! whoop whoop! y olE! andale andale! ...se fue! fantastico!

you sound just like me.

i'm sure you and your family will make good friends with the chemists. and that you'll find all the pills that you need.

good that you're going down. shit i can't imagine being at 300, ever! let alone for weeks. yes, it's fantabulous and fanshagtastic that you're coming into a beautiful, warm light. in the sunshine of spain, no less!

i think my ambitions to visit that magical place are more realistically aimed at the spring or summer. this saggitarian archer will make that happen! can't wait to see you there for tapas and sand.

abrazOnes!
rudy

[RudyB]

Hoping this is the start of my journey to freedom

your 'i'll manage just fine' reminds me of my stalwart and resourceful grandparents.

[Jimmy-Bac]

Hoping this is the start of my journey to freedom

Thanks Rudy!

The sun and sand are waiting. I look forward to some tapas with you.

The sun sure helps at the moment. I've spent years here and hardly gone out in it. Now, thanks to you I'm enjoying sessions in the sun with Macaco and Chambao to help me dream of a better life.

Besos. x

[bleep]

Hoping this is the start of my journey to freedom

Way to go Jimmy.

Just watch out dropping too fast - it is tempting to think that the job is done, and to want to get rid of the SE's! They'll go in time anyway, so no worries there, but in my experience if you drop below whatever your magic number is, problems can start.

Good luck on your baclofen hunt!

[Jimmy-Bac]

Hoping this is the start of my journey to freedom

Thanks bleep. Good advice. Now my breathing is better, I was thinking maybe I should drop 20mg at a time instead of 40mg. I didn't rush going up, so I guess I should do the same going down.

[RudyB]

Hoping this is the start of my journey to freedom

yeah, my first thought when you said '40' was that that was too fast. then i saw that you might run out of bac, so i understood differently. you'll do the math accurately.

so glad you like macaco and chambao. i just got 'entre raices y antenas' (macaco) from amazon and it rocks my world as i drive from place to place. i just discovered (via pandora) orishas from cuba, and now they're on top of my short list. check them out:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=67Tq1qkvXZw&feature=fvst[/video]]Orishas - Hay Un Son - YouTube

que tesoros nos dan!

ru

[SlipperyPete]

Hoping this is the start of my journey to freedom

Jimmy, your vivid imagery made me want to pack up and move to sunny Spain immediately. It's awesome to hear about your success and hope, but I'm gonna echo bleep's advice and say don't taper down too fast. In any case, I'm very happy for you and your freedom. Keep us posted, dude, and go get em!

[Jimmy-Bac]

Hoping this is the start of my journey to freedom

Thanks Rudy. I shall check out orishas and add it to my sun bathing collection.

Thanks SlipperyPete. I am definitely going to go down slow I have decided. Now I'm breathing better, my sleep has improved a lot, so no need to hurry.

As for my Bac panic. I was laying in bed last night worrying that no one would serve them and fretting all night. Just been to 6 chemists and got 3,000mg of baclofen from 4 with the others saying they'll have a box in each later today. Phew! So I have a guaranteed 14 days worth now and an extra 6 days worth coming later. Price wise, they work out at 16 cents or 14p a 25mg pill which is really good. My breathing just improved further!

Now to take it slow, soak up the rays and keep thinking of all the things I want to do with my new found freedom.

[Jimmy-Bac]

Hoping this is the start of my journey to freedom

Mourning a departed friend

After years of hanging out with my friend alcohol, I was finally able to get up the courage thanks to baclofen to say ?I no longer want to be part of your life?

To many, it should seem a simple thing with only good things to come from the day you took your last sip. But it is not that simple. Alcohol is like the friend your parents tell you they think is a bad influence on you. You ignore them and hang out with that friend anyway. How far it takes you and how long you remain friends varies in everyone, but has one sure outcome. If you remain in this friendship for life, there will eventually be no room for others and you will surely be left dying clutching on to that friend asking why did it end up like this?

Leaving that friend behind is no easy task. It is like leaving a long term relationship in which you have been mentally abused for years. Your friend promised you everything, but rarely gave you anything other than a hangover and regrets. You would sit at night after a few and dream of how great the world will be and the things you will achieve, only to wake up with a headache and no desire to even begin to achieve anything. Your friend has told you on many occasions that now is the right time to make that phone call and tell a person why they upset you. Rarely did that work out well as the next morning, again with a headache you remember what you did and about 99% of the time wish you hadn?t.

Eventually, your friend will put a strain on your emotions and feelings and will promise you that they are the only thing that will make you feel better. Sadly we believe that friend and so life continues. Many manage to maintain a normal life on the outside, but most of their brain power is taken up by visualising the next drink. After many years of empty promises, my anxiety had grown worse and depression kicked in. I had gone from fairly confident to having no confidence at all. I was also in another mentally abusive relationship with my now ex. So I had two best friends in the world and they were both competing for my attention. Both of them telling me to not listen to the other one, causing constant conflict in my mind. Which one did I trust the most? Not surprising it took me down a road that nearly ended my life.

It has been four Months or so since I left the ex and about one month since I left my other friend behind. Life is better, but still not without conflict. But I have realised that these emotions are because I need to acknowledge the 7 years with my ex and 17 years with my other friend and mourn their passing. I can?t ignore the fact that they played a huge role in my life. I know they are not dead, but I must move on, knowing that these two friends had a big impact on my life and I must therefore take time to realise who I am and accept the sad feelings that come along with it. Feelings of anger, frustration, sadness are all normal in this situation and the more I deal with it and allow those feelings to flow, the better off I will be in the long term. Baclofen has removed the addict in my brain and I believe it has freed up around 95% of my mind. I didn?t realise how powerful my old friend was. I have so many new thoughts and feelings that are new to me now. I am learning what they all mean, but at the same time in a clear headed way. I had a down day the other day and I know full well had I been drinking I would have gone on one of my benders and got crazy drunk. Instead, I watched a good film, went to bed and let the thoughts and feelings wash over me.

I?m learning a new life. A life without bad influences and friends I do not need. I know in the long term this is the right way to go. Sure I feel lonely sometimes, but when you are not hung-over it?s not such a bad thing. They are after all just thoughts. I don?t know where this will lead me, but I feel confident for the future and look forward to the journey ahead, whatever it may bring.

I have read in other threads people feeling depressed after reaching the switch and giving up alcohol. I think this is to be expected and wonder if it is sadness and not depression. After all, we have all lost something dear to us. It may have been a bad influence, but it gave us counselling in times of need and comforted us when we felt low. I?m sure we will all have fond memories of our departed friend, but the reality is rarely did it steer us in the right direction. I will continue to mourn until the memories fade, which they will. I now look forward to meeting new and better friends, with which I can share a healthier life with. Peace is within us and I?m on the way to finding mine. I hope you all find yours too. :l

[Isolde]

Hoping this is the start of my journey to freedom

Not much to add Jimmy, just wanted to say that was a fantastic, thought-provoking and well thought out post. I think most of us feel that way at some point after we hit the switch - like we are saying good bye to an old friend, albeit one that usually got us into trouble.

For some of us, bac gives us the ability to still spend a little time with that friend on occasion, and when they invite us out for a night of debauchery, we can very easily say, "No thanks, I've got better things to do." There's nothing like the feeling of waking up in the morning and feeling good in your body and ready to take on the day.

:goodjob:

[ifulovelife2]

Hoping this is the start of my journey to freedom

That was beautiful, Jimmy.

[SlipperyPete]

Hoping this is the start of my journey to freedom

Well done, Jimmy, you remind me of a younger me. Sounds like you have the right attitude for this, and with that in place, life just gets better and better.

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Hoping this is the start of my journey to freedom

I concur Jimmy. That was lovely. I didn't miss the booze much, but I didn't give it a definitive heave ho for a while, even after I didn't think I cared. And I was just so dang happy to not NEED the booze...oy. Still am.

SlipperyPete;1197485 wrote: Well done, Jimmy, you remind me of a younger me.

um, dude, aren't you like 12? :H A younger you...that's rich. xo

[Jimmy-Bac]

Hoping this is the start of my journey to freedom

Baclofen Update

Hi Folks,

Firstly I hope you are all well.

I'm sorry I haven't posted for ages as I've been on a bit of a life journey.

I thought i'd update my post and let you know what's been going on. After my switch at 300mg, I slowly went down to 75mg per day. I was not drinking, but at the same time not really going out and keeping myself sheltered from the outside world.

An amazing friend of mine who was my psychiatrist at the time told me about a course called avatar. Once i was settled on my daily dose of Bac, I went on the course in Florida. It was literally mind blowing. So much so, that I went on the masters course this March and just feel so good about everything. My family and friends ask me what it is about. It's tough to answer, but it's sort of like self development meets self enlightenment!

A better way to describe it is is teaches you to feel with your heart rather than think with your head. It takes the expression'follow your heart' to a whole new level!

Anyway, the courses were great and have helped me immensely. So that's that part over.

As for the Baclofen, It is still keeping me sober when i want to be which is amazing! I can go for weeks without a drink, but when I want to drink I can. I haven't found it stops me drinking though on nights i do. ie, i don't just have a couple of drinks. I default back to my usual 2 beers and a bottle of wine. But, the next day, I up my dose to 125mg and am able to not drink. This itself is amazing. Maybe with upping the dose when i do drink I might have more control?

Other than that, I still have some of my old anxiety. But the course has helped me with that a lot. I don't feel like a victim or angry about things any more and feel that having a drink is my choice. What an amazing journey it has been and continues to be.

I thought i'd just let you know i'm still about and I hope Baclofen continues to enrich all of your lives as it has mine.

That's it for now.

Big hugs from me,

James

[LibraryGirl]

Hoping this is the start of my journey to freedom

Hi James. I read through this thread (well some of it, lol) with interest and was glad to see that you posted an update. Something that's got me curious is this: is baclofen something you can take indefinitely? I don't know why I assumed it was something you had to quit eventually. It sounds like you are using it as a moderating tool. Is that right? If it works, that is really fantastic. This probably belongs in the meds thread, but since it's been here for almost a year, I hope you can reply again with some information about how safe bac is for long-term use. Thanks!

LG