I am presently around 2 weeks or so AF, Im not sure when I stopped drinking as that week of drinking is still hazy. I drank for about 5 days after around 4 weeks AF. Before that I drank for about another 5 days, the bender before that was for about 2 weeks. I havent always been a binge drinker, that started when I tried to stop drinking probably around 5 years until then I drank every day with barely a day AF although for a lot of that time I think I kinda functioned, which is something I no longer do when I drink.
Anyway thats enough history back to today, I am staying sober right now using antabuse, I doubt if I would have made it 2 weeks without that, I am also taking Campral, Ciprilex and amityptoline, the last 3 meds are prescribed for me by my doctor and I got the antabuse from a family member because my doc refuses to prescribe it to me. I am spending a lot of time in bed, my depression is not good and my anxiety levels are pretty high although so far today I am feeling ok. Doc reduced Ciplralex dose on Friday wanting to change me to another antid because I have felt so bad since starting that on about 2 months ago. I am mostley feeling bad and white knuckling it right now knowing I cant drink due to antabuse. I have ordered bac on-line a few days ago and I also already ordered neurontin (?I think thats the name) before that to try and help me deal with my moods on very bad days.
I did try bac earlier on in the year but was due to start a new job which I lost anyway due to drinking and rushed the titration and ended up drinking and taking high doses of bac, not at all something to be recommended. My family are totally opposed to me doing this, my son because of concirns over buying meds on-line and them being dangerouns, also he is concirned about taking meds without doctors support, my daughter because she thinks Im trying to take an easy way out and wangle my way back into drinking, also the expense. So I am worried about it not being me here when the post arrives and someone else opening the pakages.
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