Totally new to forum, sort of new to bac

[StuckinLA]

Totally new to forum, sort of new to bac

What's up, Central Standard Time, StuckinChitown here.

OK, so the moral of this story is actually an equation: HDB - AL = Do not get on the motherf--king airplane. Wow. All the worst of the nodding off, OMG can't breathe gonna die if I fall asleep, but still maybe about to fall asleep, but really going to kinda twitch a little and space out so I'm completely unaware of time passing and/or my surroundings SE. Then, since you're Stuck on the damned plane, you no longer have access to the tools you normally would use to combat that particular SE.

Namely, you cannot smoke. You cannot get up and walk around. You cannot stand in the bathroom forever, gripping the sink and staring into the mirror or avoiding the mirror, and you cannot then continue walking around before repeating the bathroom. You can drink, but so little it would only make things worse, even if you can afford the $7 minis. You also cannot, and it's remarkable how keenly you feel the loss of this, you cannot read or post to MWO. Then for fun let this go on for about 4 hours.

So let's just say that I didn't bother to drink at the airport. I did have one mini bottle of Jack about 1/2 through the trip. Thank All That Is Holy, that dulled the edge the tiniest of bits, and also didn't leave me completely freaking out and needing more. In retrospect, even the possibility of that occurring should have scared me away from the little bottle in the first place... But I've never been that smart. And once I bought it it's not like I could've thrown it out the window or anything.

Like I said much earlier today, my friend who knows all about the bac picked me up, and we sat in a diner all night, talking and sharing a milkshake and some fries. It was nice, though I was SE'd out of my gourd, and not feeling right at all. Couldn't think straight, even mentioned it, but she said it didn't seem like it. She actually was just thrilled to see me "normal," as she called it.

Anyway, I slept from just after 5:30 this AM to right around 8 this AM. Am a bit delirious at the moment, and just got back from the lawyer's. Amazing what 5 grand will get you. More on this soon, but right now it sounds almost too easy. Er, at least relative to what I was expecting. "Easy" would have been if the police and justice system had not F-ed me, or if I had been a whole lot smarter in the first place.

Also having what I would consider rather severe stomach/digestive issues. Sorry if that's TMI, but let's just say 225 isn't agreeing with me thus far. But I've also not slept, and eaten fast food like twice in the past day or so, and I almost never do that--maybe once every few months is more like it.

So I am going to smoke one more cigarette, then take a nap. I need a nap. Like maybe one that lasts a couple days, but with the sleep-panic thing returning I'm not looking forward to it... Will try to check in, but may be MIA for the rest of the day/tomorrow/even into Sunday. This does not, hopefully, mean I'm dead, or on a bender, but rather just hanging out with old friends for the weekend. Which I guess is what normal people do... :H

Take care everyone.

[windycitylady]

Totally new to forum, sort of new to bac

Welcom to Chi Town, Stuck! Home of schizophrenic weather, rabid baseball fans, and deep dish pizza! And 4 AM liquor stores, if you are so inclined.
That plane ride sounds brutal. Glad you made it. I did a trip home when I was on HDB. I don't remember the ride there being too bad (doesn't necessarily mean it wasn't), but once I was there I had to make my family pull the car over so I could vomit in some bushes while they all looked on. Adding insult to injury, I somehow got several mosquito bites on my face during the puking. What's amazing to me is that my family remained supportive of me doing HDB despite my constant vomitting and acting like a zombie. Huh.
Hope you get the legal issues resolved. Having a lawyer does make a huge difference, doesn't it? But it still sucks. Sucks ass. (I'm so poetic, aren't I?)
This is from a while back, but am I remembering correctly that your bartender drinks MORE than 4 red bulls a shift? I'm getting nauseous and jittery just thinking about it. I don't know if I'm impressed or repulsed. Because you seem to like her , let's go with impressed.
Have fun while you're here! Wishing you the best!
:l

[spacebebe01]

Totally new to forum, sort of new to bac

Hope you have a great weekend Stuck, crap abput the flight being so bad but at least its over and now you can try to relax and enjoy yourself.

Love ya lots x

[wuthrich8]

Totally new to forum, sort of new to bac

OMG!! not on bac, but thinking of a really long flight on topa, and now i am really scared!!! um 15 hours will kill me that way!!!:nutso::nutso: hope your trip back is better... hugs....

[redhead77]

Totally new to forum, sort of new to bac

Glad you had a safe flight, Stuck. I hate flying (and you did a great job of reminding me why), but I do love getting 'there'.

Your milkshake and fry night with your friend sounds nice...warm and cozy. I hope you have a good trip, and I think you might, even considering the legal BS.

Keep us updated!

[StuckinLA]

Totally new to forum, sort of new to bac

Hey guys & gals. Still on my phone so pain in (you pick analogy) to type. But wanted to jump in quick to thank everyone for the love. Things are going well and I'll have a longer update soon when I get back to my folks tomorrow where my laptop is. Staying in the city with a friend last night and tonight. Anyways...

Thanks again, and a special shout out to Wu. Thanks for jumping in! I did see that post on I forget which other thread. Hugs. And I'm sure the flight won't be bad like that for you. I happen to have kind of a trifecta going on that makes all that possible: panic when I feel like I'm falling asleep, the bac SE of somnolence at certain times of day that brings on that panic, and not sleeping very well generally. And + of course I've gotten more edgy about flying as I get older and more anxious generally. I counter that with AL before getting on a plane, which I didn't do this time. And as has been pointed out to me, bac is rewiring enough brain chemistry that I don't really like the feeling of intoxication. I just haven't figured out yet that I don't like it.

OK, like I said, just wanted to pop in quick. Hugs to all and hope everybody's having a good weekend.

[Bruunhilde]

Totally new to forum, sort of new to bac

Hope you have a great rest of the trip and ride back!

[ifulovelife2]

Totally new to forum, sort of new to bac

I hope you enjoy the trip home, SiLA. And don't worry about the flight back just because you're squashed in a tiny metal tube, surrounded by hundreds of strangers any one of whom could be a terrorist or spreading ebola. The chances of that are slim, as is the chance of the plane crashing. Besides, you don't need to worry about dying while it's in the air, it's just when it hits the ground that becomes a concern. Anyway, I hope I've managed to allay your fears. You're welcome.

[spacebebe01]

Totally new to forum, sort of new to bac

:lx

[StuckinLA]

Totally new to forum, sort of new to bac

Had a pretty big couple of days--party Friday night, with college friends in town. I'll spare everyone the details.

Then Saturday morning bounced from one apartment in the city to another and caught a nap. Then she says she has this brunch to go to at someone's apartment. Well, even though I'm a bit under the weather, I thought, how bad could that be?

As it turns out, though, this was mimosas and screwdrivers without the OJ. At least a dozen people packed into this place, and nowhere to turn without knocking into someone and spilling a drink all over their boat shoes. Any other day this would have been my kind of afternoon get-together, but yesterday it was hellacious. The scariest part? Those handles of vodka on the counter didn't immediately present themselves as a solution. So hungover, sober, and completely shellshocked in this kitchen I'm sipping Diet Sierra Mist and listen to my friend greeting former sorority sisters, arms raised and drinks spilling. And here I'll take a moment and invite you to imagine the volume and pitch of voices.

Escaping that, I feel as though I've gone to the brink of death and still returned safely. "Returned" is a relative term, though, and it only landed me back at the friend's apartment. We cooked dinner, watched amazingly silly TV on Netflix, and got some of the best sleep I've had in a while.

Gotta say, it's great to visit and catch up with old friends in the real world, but I'm missing my new friends here at the same time.

Hugs, peeps, hugs. :l

[spacebebe01]

Totally new to forum, sort of new to bac

Strangely the afternoon party sounds like hell to me as well, which is odd because being trapped in a place with nothing to do but get drunk should be our thing, we are getting better and its good:


I hope you will feel better after a few days to get settled with your parents, or, is it like visiting with my family, the longer it lasts the worse it gets

Hugs right back to you :l

[ifulovelife2]

Totally new to forum, sort of new to bac

StuckinLA;1363330 wrote: ...and listen to my friend greeting former sorority sisters, arms raised and drinks spilling. And here I'll take a moment and invite you to imagine the volume and pitch of voices.

LMFAO! Nice imagery.

I think that's the point at which I'd be making my apologies and getting the feck out of there.

Props for seeing it through.

[StuckinLA]

Totally new to forum, sort of new to bac

It is good that we're getting better. Instead of retreating to a corner of the room, getting sloshed, then trying to imagine any of these women thinking I'm fun or interesting or shag-worthy and getting real sad that they don't think any of these things, instead of that I could actually step back and realize that those sounds they were making wouldn't be pleasant to my ears even in other contexts. Well, maybe I shouldn't judge so quickly without further research...

[Bruunhilde]

Totally new to forum, sort of new to bac

Hi Stuck,

My mom has this "you're fat" look she gives me, we don't even need words. The first thing she does is try to get me to go on a march with her. Anyone else would call it a walk, but her intention is for me to shed weight on it and she picks up her feet and moves her arms like she's in the army, grits her teeth and goes. I have to follow. When I was hung over all the time, I would sweat alcohol and drag the whole time. About a year ago I asked her, is this the same walk we always do and she said yes. I was amazed because it was so much easier. But I still got the "you're fat" look. It's the worst thing you can say to a person in my family. It's the ultimate put down, which is why she doesn't vocalize it.

Hang in there Stuck!

[taw]

Totally new to forum, sort of new to bac

Hey! The first thing my dad said to me after I had been in rehab for a week was, "Oh, I see you've gained some weight!" OMG! Really that's what you noticed?

Now, it is "Why are you so skinny?" then if they see me eating too much, my mom will say, "Ya know if you keep that up, your hips are going to get wider!" Wider, really?

I just can't win!!

I'd suggest getting some peanut M&M's to help you thru Stuck, but that would just give your mom amo!

Few more days....happy thoughts, happy thoughts!!! Sending good juju your way to make it thru!!