24 hours later I had done it. The odd part is I had no cravings. It was almost like I had been indifferent all this time but the drinking was such an ingrained habit that I could not bare to let it go. I have had zero cravings. I could not believe it. This was so easy that I am angry at myself for not quitting sooner. I got so hung up on the idea of waking up one day and hitting this magical indifference switch that I decided I would drink until my body quit for me. I might have been able to do this at 130mg, who knows. I never gave it a real hard try because I wanted the easy way out rather than my way out.
Anyway I thought I would share this in case others were having similar issues or considering giving white knuckles a try. Turns out mine are not white at all. I have titrated down to 140 now and still no cravings. There is one thing that is different this time. Previously when I quit for 1 or more days it was very reinforcing because I did not have hangovers and it felt great to be clear headed. This time I am still waking up and experiencing that Baclofen sleepy fog stuff. I prefer that to cravings but I am ready to feel good again. I hope to ease down slowly to 80mg/day and reevaluate. We will see what happens. I hope it sticks. Sorry I was too anxious and panicky to participate on this forum much. Thanks to those who offered support.
-RIP Anna
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