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An Open Letter to the Trolls...and Everyone Else

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    #16
    An Open Letter to the Trolls...and Everyone Else

    spacebebe01;1469572 wrote: the reality is I am neither drunk or waiting for my next drink.
    Space, welcome to the sunshine, baby! You went through hell to get where you are. Hang on to it! I am utterly convinced that what we call alcoholism is an umbrella consequence for a plethora of chemical imbalances. If we can figure out the right combo for the right person, alcoholism really, truly disappears. I suspect that many eating disorders are the same dang deal - and we really can make them go away (in large part, anyway), if we can get at what drives them. I'm so glad to be here, at this point in time, where there are so many pioneers blazing trails that actually go places. :l I'm so glad that I logged on today. I'm crying.
    Ginger



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      #17
      An Open Letter to the Trolls...and Everyone Else

      I don't keep up with anything anymore but wanted to add this here. It's amazing to me. There were four of us struggling so hard here. Those friendships were my lifeline for a while. It seems that three of us (at least) have truly found our way out. I want Bruun on this train too!
      Ginger



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        #18
        An Open Letter to the Trolls...and Everyone Else

        Powerful prose WCL.

        Baclofen is offering me an alternative to the alcoholic death you describe. I especially relate to :-
        windycitylady;1469194 wrote: Have you watched as they became unable to walk and known that they were sober for the first time in their adult life because no one would go get alcohol for them?
        The polyneuropathy which if untreated leads to an inability to walk, has already set in. Baclofen might just give me a chance of avoiding that terminal indignity.

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          #19
          An Open Letter to the Trolls...and Everyone Else

          Hi Colin:

          Is neuropathy linked to AL use? I have a friend who is a very heavy drinker and she has very bad foot neuropathy...I never made that connection.

          Would be interested as I will pass this on. :thanks:

          :l

          PS: she is overweight as well which I attributed it too...
          On My Own Way Out Since May 20, 2012
          *If you think poorly of yourself, you can fail with a clear conscience.
          https://www.mywayout.org/community/f11/tool-box-27556.html tool box
          https://www.mywayout.org/community/f19/newbies-nest-30074.html newbie nest

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            #20
            An Open Letter to the Trolls...and Everyone Else

            Kradle123;1469670 wrote: Hi Colin:

            Is neuropathy linked to AL use? I have a friend who is a very heavy drinker and she has very bad foot neuropathy...I never made that connection.

            Would be interested as I will pass this on. :thanks:

            :l

            PS: she is overweight as well which I attributed it too...
            Yep. Alcoholic polyneuropathy - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

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              #21
              An Open Letter to the Trolls...and Everyone Else

              Oh my goodness.

              What wonderful, powerful responses! I am overwhelmed right now. It's a good thing I haven't put my makeup on for work yet; tears are streaming down my face. You all break my heart in the most beautiful way. We ARE a family, helping each other out.

              The internet's been acting up at the house, maybe I used it all up the other day. I can't really post well on my phone (remember how I posted almost exclusively from my trusty little Blackberry the whole time I was getting sober?), which makes things tough. I have to leave for work soon, and we're getting some pretty nasty weather right now. But I promise to come back later tonight and post more individualized responses. PLEASE check back tomorrow (Ginger, terry, people who aren't here often, I'm thinking of you.)

              Hope everyone in the midwest is battened down with some hot cocoa and good TV. This weather is just gross. Ne, I think it's headed your way next.

              Love, love, and more love.
              Hugs, hugs, and bigger hugs.

              You're all amazing people and I thank my lucky stars that we all found each other.
              "Yet someday this will have an end
              All choices made or choice resigned,
              And in your face the literal eye
              Trace little of your history,
              Nor ever piece the tale entire
              Of villages that had to burn
              And playgrounds of the will destroyed
              Before you could be safe from time
              And gather in your brow and air
              The stillness of antiquity."

              From "At Majority" by Adrienne Rich

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                #22
                An Open Letter to the Trolls...and Everyone Else

                Well, I made it to work and back! That is some serious snow...

                I've already told you all how you made me cry. Thanks again to everyone who responded, but really quickly, some specific thanks.

                Terry, it means the world to me that you would say that. I've always looked up to you, and some awful things that you had to go through on your way to indifference helped me on my journey. You're a brilliant, level-headed person, and your contributions to MWO and to the fight to get baclofen recognized are invaluable.

                RedThread, what you said was absolutely beautiful. And very flattering! Thank you. It's true: we're living proof. But you're much more inspiring and generous than I could ever hope to be.
                And I'll have you know that I'll be buying my own water bottle soon for my liquid bac that's on the way! I'm excited. I'm thinking of offering to buy some bac for the ex in Chicago that's still drinking. We'll see...

                Ginger! So thrilled to see you! I was happy for me and happy for you and happy for Space, but I didn't think of it the way you described it until you mentioned it. It's true! We all struggled together and now look at us! And what's more interesting is that we all found different things that work for us. I like your umbrella consequence comment. Alcoholism is not a one size fits all disease, and its treatment shouldn't be either.
                Wouldn't it be amazing if we could go back in time and tell our past selves that everything will be ok eventually, that we will find our way out of the hells we were in? I think about that sometimes. The relief that I would have felt to hear that I wouldn't die from drinking or suicide.
                Yes, we gotta kidnap Bruun. You and I will ply her with medical MJ, and Space and I will force feed her epilepsy meds. Now that's a party. :H
                Hope your health is ok and everything's going well at the homestead.

                Sweet, sweet Space. But you did say something meaningful, you know that, right? I am so thrilled for you. I have seen you go to some really fucking dark places, Space. Really dark. But you never gave up. And now look at you. Don't question it. Don't worry about it. It's real! Enjoy your freedom. You deserve it. And I'm sure your family is enjoying it too. :l

                Colin, I'm so sorry to hear about the onset of polyneuropathy. I hope you can avoid it too.

                Guys, I'm trying not to be a jerk who shows up every couple of months and writes these huge, obnoxious posts and then disappears again. I really am.
                But thanks for tolerating me when that is what I do.
                :h
                "Yet someday this will have an end
                All choices made or choice resigned,
                And in your face the literal eye
                Trace little of your history,
                Nor ever piece the tale entire
                Of villages that had to burn
                And playgrounds of the will destroyed
                Before you could be safe from time
                And gather in your brow and air
                The stillness of antiquity."

                From "At Majority" by Adrienne Rich

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                  #23
                  An Open Letter to the Trolls...and Everyone Else

                  I am laughing and crying at the same time, the idea of the party where we have Bruun in the middle with the MJ and epilepsy meds LOL. It means so much to me to have you both (Windy and Ginger) here with me right now, it is even more special that we can be together a year later after the struggle and be ok now. How fucking amazing is that. xx

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                    #24
                    An Open Letter to the Trolls...and Everyone Else

                    Yes, we really are an army of ex-convicts, right?
                    We're released from the sentence to death and we are willing to fight together.
                    Today is the first day of the rest of my life.

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                      #25
                      An Open Letter to the Trolls...and Everyone Else

                      Good post, Windy!
                      Alcoholic (or Ally)

                      "Only a fool knows everything.
                      A wise man knows how little he knows."

                      Please feel free to block/ignore my posts through your control panel.

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                        #26
                        An Open Letter to the Trolls...and Everyone Else

                        I noticed that one of the trolls has evaporized.

                        Good for him and good for us.
                        Today is the first day of the rest of my life.

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                          #27
                          An Open Letter to the Trolls...and Everyone Else

                          Dearest WindyCityLady,

                          I have been in so much pain lately and really struggling to function everydamnday due to chronic neck issues. I apologize for not writing this much sooner, I wasn't up to speed. I started an email to you days ago, but never got through it. I went to read up on your recent posts so I could complete my letter and just read your latest post re: your closed thread. I'm sad & sorry and simultaneously grateful. Honestly, that was the most powerful post I've ever read. In the letter I was writing I had commented on the disaster that became of that thread and subsequent closing, what a fucking train wreck. However, it became the platform for you to say what may not have otherwise been expressed. You are my hero. I fully agree in that we have to do WHATEVER IT TAKES to free ourselves from the death sentence of alcohol. Beautiful, precious post. Thank you. :l

                          I will now finish my PM & send as well.

                          Much peace and love my friend. P :h
                          "People, even more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed, and redeemed; never throw out anyone."
                          
? Audrey Hepburn, Actress and Philanthropist :heart:

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                            #28
                            An Open Letter to the Trolls...and Everyone Else

                            Dearest WindyCityLady,

                            I have been in so much pain lately and really struggling to function everydamnday due to chronic neck issues. I apologize for not writing this much sooner, I wasn't up to speed. I started an email to you days ago, but never got through it. I went to read up on your recent posts so I could complete my letter and just read the start to this thread 2/25/13 re: your closed thread & beyond. I'm sad & sorry and simultaneously grateful. Honestly, that was the most powerful post I've ever read. In the letter I was writing I had commented on the disaster that became of that thread and subsequent closing, what a fucking train wreck. However, it became the platform for you to say what may not have been expressed otherwise. You are my hero. I fully agree in that we have to do WHATEVER IT TAKES to free ourselves from the death sentence of alcohol. Beautiful, precious post. Thank you. :l

                            I will now finish my PM & send as well.

                            Much peace and love my friend. P :h
                            "People, even more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed, and redeemed; never throw out anyone."
                            
? Audrey Hepburn, Actress and Philanthropist :heart:

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                              #29
                              An Open Letter to the Trolls...and Everyone Else

                              Superb post, Windy.

                              I can't tell you the number of negative posts I've seen here and other places about the meds I take--meds that saved my life. As far as I'm concerned, the trolls don't know what they're talking about, or are being mean, and I ignore them. I'm alive, no longer in agony with depression and GAD, and that's what matters to me.

                              I have no problem with "big pharma." As a matter of fact, a big thanks to the researchers and companies who fund them!
                              "Remember, you are responsible for creating your life by every thought, action, choice. Choose well." Oprah Winfrey

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