Baclofen and the man on mars

[bleep]

Baclofen and the man on mars

Sorry, missed your posts last time around.

Definitely, drinking makes the SE's more pronounced, as I think you have discovered for yourself!

How are the rest of the SE's treating you?

[man on mars]

Baclofen and the man on mars

I stopped taking baclofen for awhile because I thought I had some unrelated health issues going on, and wanted to make sure that I wasn't getting baclofen SE's mixed up with genuine symptoms of something else. I seem to be okay, so I've started taking it again. This time, I've noticed that the SE's are significantly diminished. I've ramped up to 40 mg/day rather quickly and am not experiencing significant SE's.

I am thinking about trying to find a local doctor who specializes in addiction and trying to talk him/her into prescribing baclofen. In the past, I took naltrexone without a prescription, and without fear, because I knew that if I suddenly had to stop taking it for some reason, it wouldn't be a big deal. Baclofen, on the other hand, is serious stuff. I didn't notice any withdrawal symptoms after taking ~30 mg/day for a couple of weeks and stopping, but I'm sure once I work my way up to a higher dose, it will be a serious concern. The nightmare scenario I have in mind is being sent on a short-notice business trip overseas and having my baclofen confiscated at the airport because I don't have a prescription for it. Going into withdrawals while on a business trip, when I'm put under the most stress I ever normally go through in my life, would be unthinkably bad. If I had a prescription, then even if that happened, I could find a local doctor wherever I travel, have them call my doctor to confirm that I need to take this medication, and get a prescription filled. I live in Seattle, and haven't found any information online that points me to a doctor or clinic around here that can help, but I figure if I make some calls, I might find someone.

[man on mars]

Baclofen and the man on mars

Continuing to increase my dose. I am taking a 25 mg pill in the morning and not feeling any significant SE's during the day. Taking an additional 19 mg (3/4 of a 25 mg pill) in the afternoon and another half pill in the evening. So, around 56 mg/day currently. Tolerating it well.

Drinking a lot right now. At least 10 drinks a night for the last couple of weeks. It's not good. The feeling of urgency to start drinking is diminished, but once I start, I lose control immediately and drink all I can stomach. Hangovers have been remarkably tolerable, though. I see a lot of posts about how hangovers when taking baclofen are especially bad, but I've had the exact opposite experience.

I find myself much less interested in drinking when I am sober, even though I'm still drinking heavily every night. I pass on invitations to go out drinking with friends. I am eager to continue ratcheting up my baclofen dose based on the subjective effects I'm experiencing so far. I can see myself having AF days (nights, really - I don't drink during the day) as a common occurrence in the future, and not struggling so hard to make them happen. I need to find things to occupy my time on those nights, though. Reading helps, but I find my attention wandering from the book every 15 minutes and thinking about getting a drink.

I am not just going to have to quit drinking so much, I'm going to have to rebuild my whole lifestyle. The pattern of existence that I've locked myself into over the last decade. It's a shitty situation. I wish I had someone to confide in, who could help support me. I'm wary of therapists. I'm incredibly averse to AA -- how can spending hours hanging out with other alcoholics talking about drinking be beneficial when you're trying to push drinking out of your mind? And their bullshit religion-centric 12-step program...no thanks. Life is hard for alcoholics who want to get out. You all know that already, though.

[buddabelly]

Baclofen and the man on mars

Hi MoM,

M.y situation is similar to yours. I've made an app with a Doc for June. He is an addiction specialist. I will have to travel to London to see him privately. Because he is an authority on addiction in this country, I'm praying he can get my GP to prescribe the Bac. Then, as you say, I won't have to worry about running out. As you pointed out, when your on high dose this is not a viable option.

I too have to totally rebuild my life style. Not just my evenings. I lost my job 6 yrs ago, I was a Probation Officer, and have been unemployed ever since. basically when I drink these days it's a full time occupation.

I waver about AA. I stayed sober for 8yrs, starting off with AA. I hated the, as I saw it religious aspects about it. I just use to think that the strength that I got from others was my ' higher power '. I'm waverig about going back. I don't want my whole life to be about NOT drinking any more than it is about drinking.

I've got serios anxiety problems and so far the Bac seems to be helping with that.

As for confiding in someone, I've just spilled my guts on here. I haven't edited anything. I just sit on here and tell it like it is for me right now. It's actually very cathartic and a damn sight cheaper than therapy. The resposes from others are amazing.

I will continue to follow your journey with interest.

Lea

[man on mars]

Baclofen and the man on mars

Well, last night was pretty awful. Somewhere in the neighborhood of 18 drinks. Woke up still drunk. Would've called in sick to work if I didn't have a meeting that I couldn't miss. Showed up late, left early. Head swimming. I wish they didn't sell liquor at the grocery store, I really should not keep any around, and yet I keep making the mistake of buying a bottle about once a week. Always lose total control when liquor is on hand...at least with beer, I'm limited by the volume I can manage to drink.

Moving up to 63 mg today. SE's still manageable, barely noticeable if I'm not hung over. Magnitude of SE's is definitely proportional to magnitude of hangover. I intend to get to bed as early as possible tonight and hopefully get an early start tomorrow to make up some of the hours I missed.

Haven't been to the gym in months. I mainly lift weights, but I always stall at about the same point because I don't eat enough. Big surprise, over half of my caloric intake comes from beer. I stopped going because it started to feel like wasted effort. I got some good exercise this weekend, though. The weather has finally gotten nice and I've broken my bike out for the season. This far north, the sun stays up until 9 PM in the summer. I may try to get out of the house in the evenings and go for a long ride as a way to busy myself. Hard to drink alcohol when you're out biking around. Too wrecked from last night's poor decision-making to go on a ride tonight, though.

I've put on a bit of weight since starting on baclofen. I usually hover around 180 lbs, but am at about 190 now. Even without the scale, I can tell just by how my clothes fit. Hopefully I can start to mitigate this by drinking less and getting more exercise.

[bleep]

Baclofen and the man on mars

The SE's combine with a hangover to make the next day truly awful. I feel for you. At the same time, don't let it derail your progress. Just keep pushing higher within the limits of what you are comfortable with, and you will get there.

The weight issue is crap, but you have the right approach. People have found that exercise while on baclofen is both easier and more beneficial than normal, but personally I find exercise of any form to be abhorrent. Which is a pity, because I also put on weight on baclofen.

[john doe]

Baclofen and the man on mars

Fair play to you making it to work Mars. Booze and Bac combined on Monday morning for me to felt pretty awful. There's no way I'd have made it to work even if pushed.

I haven't exercised in weeks as I've been hitting the booze hard. I was gonna head down to the park for some sprints but its lashing with rain here so think I'll give it a miss.

[man on mars]

Baclofen and the man on mars

I posted yesterday that I was moving up to 63 mg; that's actually the dose I had been at for a couple of days. I moved up to 75 mg yesterday. 25, 25, 12.5, 12.5.

I have been taking 25 mg in the morning for several days and experiencing minimal SE's. Today I moved up to 31 mg. Pretty decent SE's. Dizzy spells, in line with what I was experiencing the first week I was taking it. I think I'm still a bit hung over from Monday, but I also drank quite a bit last night, so in general I think today's SE's were more the result of hangover than increased dose. Took another 25 in the afternoon. Will probably tack 25 more onto that later tonight for a total of 81 mg.

Indifference...I think I can feel it slowly creeping up. I have a ways to go, but I feel like I can see it coming on the horizon, if that makes any sense. My feelings toward drinking when I'm sober are a lot different than they were before. Tomorrow night, I'm going to an event that I will need to drive to, and at which there will be no alcohol, and I probably won't get home til late. I doubt I'll end up taking a full-on AF day, but at the very least I will be out of the house and not drinking for most of the evening.

[man on mars]

Baclofen and the man on mars

Skipped out on the event tonight. Feeling kind of zombie-like, not a lot of energy or motivation to do anything. Drinking, of course. Indifference is not close. I'm happy to be approaching the 100 mg mark after only 14 days since I started taking baclofen again, though.

31 mg again this morning. Moderate SE's but not as bad as yesterday. Tolerable, for the most part. Gonna hang at 81 mg again tomorrow and probably go up to 88 on Saturday.

[man on mars]

Baclofen and the man on mars

Re: weight gain, the pants that have been comfortable to wear for the last couple of years are now uncomfortably tight. Lame.

[man on mars]

Baclofen and the man on mars

I think I missed my last dose on Saturday. Went out drinking and surprise surprise, overindulged. Don't remember much after I got home, but I don't think I remembered to take the pills.

88 mg today, planning to take 88 again tomorrow and may bump up to 94 on Tuesday.

Today was pretty good after the hangover wore off. Rode my bike about 20 miles, including a couple of decent hill climbs. I'm in better shape than I give myself credit for. I'm now planning out future rides. I think there will be a lot of bike riding this summer. I'm really, genuinely, looking forward to it. A sober activity. Yep.

[RedThread12]

Baclofen and the man on mars

You go, man on mars!! THIS is what it's like to save your life, with baclofen. Really. Everything you describe has been posted, here, somewhere. And, ummm . . . good luck with finding that "addiction specialist" who will prescribe high dose baclofen for you, much less know as much about it as you do. So far, after almost 4 years on this board, I know of 2; count 'em - 2 legitimate M.D.'s or psychiatrists who will write those prescriptions - Dr. L in the U.S. and Chick (or something like that) in the U.K. Please, someone prove me wrong and tell me who your physician is that is writing your script for more than 80 mg/day. Or one that told YOU to take baclofen, and exactly how to take it, to cure your alcoholism.

All of that aside, m o m, you're doing great!! Yes, it's a suffering to come out of addiction. I don't know about you, but I know that my suffering IN addiction was nearing suicide, and if I didn't do that, it would not have been long before I killed myself with alcohol, anyway.

Please read, read, read threads from some incredible MWO members who drank (and suffered) a LOT, up until their place of indifference. Know that you are not alone. What you are experiencing has been not only lived through, but is now part of the story of freedom from the lash of not being able to not drink for many people.

Keep taking the damned pills. Or whatever you're taking. Don't give up!! Not that it sounds as if you're planning to - just wanted to pop in and say that you appear to be right on track to freedom!

[man on mars]

Baclofen and the man on mars

Thanks, RedThread.

Pretty heavy drinking last night, about 13 or 14. Finally experiencing some lack of sleep due to baclofen; I woke up at about 6:30 and remained awake in bed until 7:30 when I had to actually get up. Only managed about six hours of sleep, and after a night of hard drinking, I really need eight to function. Still a bit drunk waking up for the second Tuesday in a row. Spent the whole day in a meeting, hung over. Had trouble getting any lunch down. Managed to power through an entire shift, though, at least.

Took 31 mg twice so far today, SE's ever-present but tolerable. Fairly depressed tonight. Trying to keep the drinks to 8 or less. I'm pretty tired from lack of sleep and experiencing some somnolence from bumping to 31 mg for my afternoon dose, so maybe I will get to bed before I do too much damage.

Interesting thing today was that I spent a large portion of the day daydreaming about girls. Cute bartender last night stuck in my mind. I haven't had real feelings for a girl in about six months and today I felt like all those lights were on in my brain again. Kind of nice, except now I'm feeling incredibly lonely. I've pretty much put my dating efforts on hold since I decided a couple months back that I was going to start TSM again (and later baclofen when that didn't work) and I would really like to get myself away from the daily heavy drinking before I meet the next girl. The dilemma of the single trying-to-recover alcoholic: alcoholics don't want to date me because I'm trying to leave their lifestyle behind (and my admission shines light on their own problem, which they don't like), and normal people don't want to date an alcoholic. I think I need to make a lot more progress before I date again, and when I do, I absolutely have to avoid girls who also have a drinking problem.

[Juan BH]

Baclofen and the man on mars

Mars-

I got sober for a while in my early 20's and ended up meeting a girl who didn't drink. We are still married but I am here on mwo. There are plenty of alcoholic couples out there who make it work. I have heard that two alkies can be a dangerous combo, but at least they would know how to have a good time!

I also had a period of time at a lower Bac dose where every woman in the world appeared quite beautiful and lovely. That has passed, but it was nice while it lasted.

Hang in there man. It will get better. I have titrated slowly and that has worked well for me.

[man on mars]

Baclofen and the man on mars

Tolerating 94 mg/day pretty well at this point. Will probably bump to a nice round 100 mg tomorrow, 38-31-31, as the SE's are not too bad and I am interested in continuing to increase my dose as fast as I can stand. Still getting pretty heavy somnolence after my afternoon dose, but nothing I can't get through.

Did well on the alcohol intake Tuesday and Wednesday nights. 8 drinks each night. Obviously, that is a lot, but it's about as much as I can drink without really feeling it the next day. 10 and I'm hung over enough for it to affect my functionality at work; 12 and I'm pretty ill, 14+ and I wake up slightly drunk, am wrecked all day, and may still be hung over the following day, too. My liver is an amazingly resilient organ, but my ability to handle heavy drinking the next day has dropped off noticeably as I've gotten older.

I'm now waking up sometime around 3 AM every night and then every hour or two for the rest of the night until I have to get ready for work. The good news is that I am at least making it back to sleep after only a couple minutes of wakefulness, typically. Vivid dreams still coming to me every night, though I don't remember them if I drank a lot that night, and I remember the ones that occur between my first awakening and when I get out of bed the most clearly. They are mostly not positive, and a recurring theme is that I'm desperately trying to get to someone and can't. Frustration. The dreams become closer to lucid as the night progresses, and I've started trying to steer them in a favorable direction by thinking about fun dream ideas while I'm awake in between bouts of sleep. Have had some partial success with this, actually.