UKBlonde's Sinclair Method journey

[YouKayBee]

UKBlonde's Sinclair Method journey

Jazi's Mum;1603975 wrote: UKB you say you take the odd 25mg but don't know if it helps or not...can you be a little more specific? Can you feel it in your body? Do you feel more relaxed? Do you mean you tried to get a spacy buzzed feeling from the bac instead of alcohol?

Sometimes I'm afraid that's what I want to do also and I think, heck I might as well just keep drinking rather than importing an expensive drug from India!!

But from what I've read most of those who have titrated up very very slowly don't experience the SEs as bad or at all in some cases so there is no buzz to get spacy/buzzed on. Darn! I wish Monday would hurry and come!! I want to see for myself. Have a great day - or I guess it's evening there eh?

When I started with baclofen 3 years ago I liked the spacey feeling and would try and get a buzz from it, I enjoyed it too much but it wasn't like a euphoric effect, more of getting zonked.

I can't say I feel the 25mg, but I did find when I was on high dose that I wouldn't feel each dose I took until hours later. It's mid afternoon here right now.

[spuddleduck]

UKBlonde's Sinclair Method journey

ukb, its interesting you talk about the transference of addiction (or whatever it is we are filling). noticed over the time ive been here that a lot of people have mentioned also having problems with food issues. I imagine it can be really difficult to control as we NEED food to live so unlike alcohol we cant just omit it completely. I hope you can keep working on it, its a bugger to have that to deal with as well when you have done so getting alcohol out of your life.
I have had vague issues in the past with food, I used to hide it pretending I had eaten and was so terrified of putting on weight that if I had overeaten I would spend the next day running/cycling/sit upping..... whatever to get those terrifying calories off. needless to say I seem to have got over that little episode and now am a couple of stone overweight...... but working on it.

[YouKayBee]

UKBlonde's Sinclair Method journey

spuddleduck;1604132 wrote: ukb, its interesting you talk about the transference of addiction (or whatever it is we are filling). noticed over the time ive been here that a lot of people have mentioned also having problems with food issues. I imagine it can be really difficult to control as we NEED food to live so unlike alcohol we cant just omit it completely. I hope you can keep working on it, its a bugger to have that to deal with as well when you have done so getting alcohol out of your life.
I have had vague issues in the past with food, I used to hide it pretending I had eaten and was so terrified of putting on weight that if I had overeaten I would spend the next day running/cycling/sit upping..... whatever to get those terrifying calories off. needless to say I seem to have got over that little episode and now am a couple of stone overweight...... but working on it.

Yes the food thing is a bugger and chocolate is worse than booze for being EVERYWHERE. I've stopped the exercise compensation, if I binge I just carry on as normal, might miss a meal if I'm not hungry but that's only 'cos I'm full from what I've overeaten on.

I've looked up the fitbit, I don't work in kcals. I have a coach who tells me what to eat (basic simple foods and amounts), when to eat and what training to do. The training is knackering and after that I just do normal essential activities then try and rest as much as possible so I can recover before the next onslaught. Not counted kcals for years now and I find it a lot easier this way, although I have to weigh everything (apart from veg and eggs) so my essential is a kitchen scale and a camera for progress photos - I rarely weigh myself at all. Very occasionally I'll measure my waist.

I can see the fitbit would be good for someone who isn't aware of how active or inactive they are, to make them realise what they are doing and eating. The foods I eat are really simple, not prepackaged, nothing added which makes it really easy. It can be boring at first and that's what I struggled with after eating rubbish for months over summer, I'm used to it again now so the urges to eat chocolate are a lot less - just had a banana and that being my only simple sugary thing I eat was gorgeous (amazing how you can lust after a simple thing as a banana!).

[spuddleduck]

UKBlonde's Sinclair Method journey

well ukb you certainly don't do things half heartedly. I think I would punch a coach and go eat a bar of choc just for badness. the fitbit has been good for me so far (all of 5 days). its basically just a modern pedometer and the only thing it really registers is steps but its encouraging me to keep up the same level or more walking each day. I was pounding my treadmill last night as I hadn't reached my days goal.... sure ill soon get bored with it as with all Christmas toys and start playing with the cardboard box it came in.
being so intense with you routine must help with your motivation not to drink. it would be crazy to drink after you put so much effort into your health and fitness...... and I don't think you could fit it into your busy day anyway.

[bkyogagurl]

UKBlonde's Sinclair Method journey

UK- just thinking of you... I drank today but switched to tea a bit earlier but it's 12:30 am here and I got a terribly craving for mint chip ice cream & chocolate sauce so guess what I am doing...

[YouKayBee]

UKBlonde's Sinclair Method journey

bkyogagurl;1605452 wrote: UK- just thinking of you... I drank today but switched to tea a bit earlier but it's 12:30 am here and I got a terribly craving for mint chip ice cream & chocolate sauce so guess what I am doing...

Ha ha nothing wrong with tea and ice cream. Tis better than booooze, I think I just let the "well so long as I'm not drinking, eating is better" get a bit too out of hand, or at least go past it's useful date.

Yeah Spuds I am an obsessive all or nothing and the training & diet really makes use of that. Quite a few successful people in sport have obsessive pasts, addiction history etc. I also have a lazy side and can reign myself in so long as I believe it's working!

The coaches have all been internet based so I can't punch them, not in my town mostly email communication which can be lonely at times, but also not intrusive at the same time. They don't tell me off they give me what I ask for - which is a plan that work. Funny how it's others who try to wangle around it, "can you not have eeeenormous eggs, or salmon that's a fish (when I've been given white fish only cos that's little more than protein and water), or asparagus with butter on it, do you mash your sweet potato with cream or anything. Nooo I feel like screaming(and people do go wrong by adding in things like that), it's what it says, not a competition to try and sneak stuff in. I do it for me cos I'm the one who does it at the end of the day - I'm the one who has committed and have to get up there and do it. If I don't do what they say I only have me to blame and I don't need any more self-flagellation in my life.

[Jazi's Mum]

UKBlonde's Sinclair Method journey

Morning Ukblonde. Boy, you are disciplined and we can all learn from what you say. I guess it is harder, though, to work for a goal that's in the future. So easy to chose the good now, because it's always now. I read that somewhere (over on TSM forum I think), that sobriety in the future is good, but the drink now is better - and it's always now!!

Internet coaches - cool eh? There is a lot of very bad stuff on the internet, but I'm finding there is so much that's good too. So much to learn and read and experience. Have a great day, and a Happy New Year.

[YouKayBee]

UKBlonde's Sinclair Method journey

Jazi's Mum;1605616 wrote: Morning Ukblonde. Boy, you are disciplined and we can all learn from what you say. I guess it is harder, though, to work for a goal that's in the future. So easy to chose the good now, because it's always now. I read that somewhere (over on TSM forum I think), that sobriety in the future is good, but the drink now is better - and it's always now!!

Internet coaches - cool eh? There is a lot of very bad stuff on the internet, but I'm finding there is so much that's good too. So much to learn and read and experience. Have a great day, and a Happy New Year.

There is but I do meet them in person before working together. I work well on my own once I've been given a start, so works for me.

Re the discipline I know if I don't do it I'll beat myself up, I'll be like why didn't you do that? so I have to do it and it's hard. Some people think it's easy for me, or automatic. Every day I get up and think "I can't be arsed, why am I doing this, why do I put myself through this regime", but I get myself in the kitchen preparing food, out training, in not having a social life and it all sort of works out. Well apart from the days when I spill my carefully measured rice, or eggs I'm beating, all over the floor. Words come out that only Spuds can say drunk!

Did see a message on another coaching site (people I know of in real life), they have had to put up a notice advising whilst they will provide training a nutrition plans they are not there to chat, just because you are lonely or whatever. I actually can empathise and know where they are coming from. Internet is good, but can also be abused too.

Have a good evening x

[YouKayBee]

UKBlonde's Sinclair Method journey

I think there's something I need to add here, 'cos I've just referred to it on another TSM thread and I need to get it out.

One of the reasons (and I'm finding it hard to say this) I quit AL this last summer was because I was becoming wierd when I drank, some of the old behaviours were peeking through, and it was threatening my relationships, livelyhood and could have affected what I am hoping to do in the future. Because I'd worked so hard to gain trust, and because I do care it only took a couple of minorish (but scary post TSM) incidents for me to decide that was it. Having gotten through the extinction process (for non-TSMers that means you break the addiction link in your brain) chosing not to drink was the blindingly obvious thing to do, and the thing L0op confirmed would be the right thing to do. He told me he rarely gave/gives advice, but that this was once piece of advice he was now giving me.

I have not drunk alcohol since 22nd July and have only in the last few weeks had a bit sneak into my diet via two rogue Christmas puddings and a liquer chocolate which was startling and yak at the same time.

[bkyogagurl]

UKBlonde's Sinclair Method journey

Thanks for this post UK- I am wondering if I'm pushing the extinction process instead of letting it happen. I don't know if I would consider my behavior odd but I think I wear my feelings on my sleeve when I drink and have shown that here. I am not sure if it's a good progress to feel so comfortable to do that or if it's an annoyance to my friends here. Sometimes I wonder if I unconsciously try to push people because I haven't gained enough self worth yet.

Anyway- so impressed with your AF decision as it gives hope to me. I wonder when I will know when I am ready. I feel like I am today but having a party tonight may change my mind. I hate that.

I actually started training for a fitness competition and was eating like that. My trainer was actually a friend of mine so she lended much support but the no alcohol thing was to hard for me and I could not be honest with her. I have another trainer I work with on weights part of my program and was honest with her and she is supportive and understands my using drinking as a coping mechanism but I feel she gets frustrated with me because I don't apply myself like I should. I feel she sees the potential in what I could do. She has tried to push me along and told me " you are to good of a person not to feel good about yourself." I need to get it together because she is right.

I would love to hear about where you are in your training.

[spuddleduck]

UKBlonde's Sinclair Method journey

bkyoga... im following you ..tee hee. not quite sure what you were saying in your post but it I think the whole extinction thing is that you kind of just go with it. so long as you take the nal, and obviously with some effort on our part, things should happen in time.
ive just noticed your join date is 2010, the same as me... and look at how many posts we have made. im thinking perhaps I talk / type too much... most of the time I just ramble as its good to get some thoughts out of my head and I always think that something I say may just click with someone else and if it helps well that's good enough for me. see what I mean about rambling...and this is when im sober. ukb, it sounds like you have made a very wise decision about being af, and when all said and done alcohol doesn't really have a place in any training regime so best to stay the hell away from it

[Blue79]

UKBlonde's Sinclair Method journey

Cue the Typical AA godly abstinence idiots in the comments making weak strawman arguments on the OP-ED.

[spuddleduck]

UKBlonde's Sinclair Method journey

just had a read of this. what is the difference between naltrexone and nalfamene or are they the same but different names

[YouKayBee]

UKBlonde's Sinclair Method journey

spuddleduck;1606878 wrote: just had a read of this. what is the difference between naltrexone and nalfamene or are they the same but different names

Nalfamene is the new improved version of Naltrexone, it's also 3 times the cost and don't think it's available from online pharmacies yet. They are prescribing it on the NHS in Scotland under the name Selincro which is the brand name.

[spuddleduck]

UKBlonde's Sinclair Method journey

thanks ukb. im being lazy by not looking it up myself but as you are our resident expert I like to ask you. also the info being out here may help others. did you try nalfamene and if so did you find a difference. I probably could get it from my docs as they have record of my problems with alcohol. call me daft but at the moment I don't want to go through it all with my doc. I have a new doctor who I haven't discussed these things with and for some crazy reason I don't want to. even though I know she will have all my records detailing my problems for some reason I wanted to keep myself 'clean and nice' with her. if, as I hope I will have continuing success with nal I will have to go through her as my finances are not too jolly at the moment.