Concerns now that I ordered my bac

[StuckinLA]

Concerns now that I ordered my bac

Hey Fish,

I almost never suggest that people read my thread--usually the opposite, actually--but you remind me a lot of me. How I was when I started bac, what my goals were, etc. You might find it helpful. So...

https://www.mywayout.org/community/f2...bac-63480.html

[bleep]

Concerns now that I ordered my bac

I was going to reply, but Stuck hit it pretty squarely. You won't really want to get drunk anymore. You can, and won't want to drink the next day, but the desire to get off your head disappears.

I also think you are thinking too much! Just do it, and see what happens.

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Concerns now that I ordered my bac

Again, I understand what you're asking and why you're asking.

The overarching concern related to making sure that you'll be able to drink socially and enjoy it is a function of obsession with alcohol. Baclofen removes that. Because you're still obsessing about alcohol, you cannot (or at least I could not) believe or understand what it's like to have that removed from your thinking.

The short answer is yes, you might be able to drink socially and even get drunk and euphoric. Without "relapse." If you go out drinking, and start doing shots with the boys (or whatever) and then get in a car/a fight/a stupid situation, you'll have long term repercussions. Baclofen doesn't stop stupidity.

I say you might be able to, because not everyone can or wants to. What it depends on is you. Not me, not the medication, you. There are dozens of accounts around this forum of people who began to drink in an unhealthy way after indifference and guess what? They drank in an unhealthy way. Generally they stop taking baclofen. Because it interferes with drinking.

Writing explicit accounts of how much we drink and how often, on a forum dedicated to people who are combatting a chronic, deadly disease is rather insensitive. Wouldn't you agree? What matters is this: We (my husband and I and many others) drink when and how and why we want to now. Not only could we not do this before, abstinence and every treatment we tried (pretty much the full gamut) was an abysmal and miserable failure.

There are also many, many, many accounts of people who didn't make it to indifference. The reasons are varied. Some aren't ready to quit drinking. Some can't handle the SEs. Some don't believe in medications.

Setting limitations now, before you've started, is also a bit counter-productive. Don't get me wrong. I did it. Repeatedly. My first limit was 100 mg and 1 month. I ended up taking 320 mg and it took 4 months. I was going to stay on HDB (high dose baclofen) for a year, and no more. It's been 27 months since I reached indifference, and 2 and a half years since I started taking baclofen.

It took me three miserable tries (that I can remember) to be able to titrate all the way up to indifference. If you decide to do this thing, some of the questions you might want to start thinking about are these:
How does it work?
What can I do to make sure it works for me?
What have other people done right/wrong that I can learn from?

Using tools that you learn about in those meetings you are going to isn't a bad idea. It's not necessary, exactly. If you take enough pills for long enough you won't want to drink anymore. But that doesn't mean you'll be happy. just sayin'. Also on the just sayin' front, if you're 27, and you're living in a sober house, you got it like I got it. That ain't good. Why wait?

Start with pill one.

[fishcake]

Concerns now that I ordered my bac

Thanks all for your input.

I understand I am having the wrong approach by wanting to realize the classic alcoholic dream of becoming a normal drinker again. Now that I had the night to sleep over that thought, I realize what is most important to me right now is to be able to be in most of the social environments I have to avoid right now, not being able to get drunk w/o consequences. If I manage to become indifferent to alcohol, perfect. If I can go out with some friends/for business w/o the will to be plastered but ending up having a drink or two with no euphoria, then that's fine, I can live with that. I just don't want to run the risk of spiraling into total alcoholic oblivion the next day and ending up in jail/hospital/dead.

What I do not like about the abstinence program offered by AA is not the "learning how to be happy sober" part of it, but the "you have no business in environments that evolve around alcohol". If can move past that, hang out in bars/clubs w/o having the fear of deadly relapse, it would be just fine, like I said, even if I can't/won't want to get plastered.

My titration will definitely be AF, I am in the perfect setting for that, and I'll continue AA during. As for knowing when I reached indifference, I'll just do a couple of tests once I reached a decent level of bac. This includes: hanging out in a bar and seeing if I don't dwell on other people's drinking while not drinking, then, if I succeed, try one drink, then two and see from there. If I can spend multiple weekends AF or with low consumption of alcohol going back to my normal social activities, only then will I move back into a normal apartment and get back in touch with my social circle. Again, I will continue AA during all of this because it has this therapeutic side of it that helps me with my character defects, the total abstinence part of it will be of no interest if I succeed with bac.

Thanks again everybody for your support, I can't wait to start my journal in a week or two and get your precious feedback, MWO seems to have a very helpful group of people with our disease.

[kronkcarr]

Concerns now that I ordered my bac

fishcake,

it sounds like you're figuring it out. yay!

I was AF when I titrated up on bac. that's one way I knew that I'd reached indifference. I've also had thoughts like you've expressed. I was funny and free when I drank with friends and I have missed that part of my personality. upon reflection, I'm not really sure that that was me. I've posted this elsewhere, but I can have 2 drinks but any more and I just want to sleep. when I'm out with friends at a bar I don't care about the AL at all. Bac has changed that for me.

you've received great advice here!

[fishcake]

Concerns now that I ordered my bac

I just realized, I can only commute to work driving. Will it be ok if I take bac after I drive to work (I go there really early) , then at noon then I drive back home and take bac before bedtime?

Another thing I'm concerned about is that I won't be able to take a leave of absence to hardcore titrate, I've already taken 2x1month medical leaves and almost lost my job. I really hope the SEs about concentration and memory loss won't affect my days at work too much, I manage different teams, conduct presentations and deal with business partners... I can't fuck this up because it involves people and money...thankfully no human lives!

[john doe]

Concerns now that I ordered my bac

I'd just take it really slow. My memory and concentration is long shot well before I started Baclofen but I've noticed a drop in both. Probably only because I've went up faster than normal. If you take it easy and go up slow it shouldn't be so bad.

I take my hat off to all you with full on professions. I certainly couldn't do it.

[bleep]

Concerns now that I ordered my bac

Try getting hold of some Piracetam. A lot of people report that it helps.

And you will just have to see how baclofen affects you before making any calls on the driving, and indeed the work issues. I held down a pretty demanding job while titrating up, but I did look pretty stoned, which didn't sit very well. I just blamed it on medication, and left it at that. My immediate superior was aware what the story was though.

[fishcake]

Concerns now that I ordered my bac

Also just ordered an e-cigarette...might as well try to find alternatives for all of my addictions! :H

[john doe]

Concerns now that I ordered my bac

I know lots of people who rave about those e-cigarette's. I've a few friends with 60 to 80 a day habits.

That's ?160 a week habit!

[fishcake]

Concerns now that I ordered my bac

60-80 cigarettes a day?!

[fishcake]

Concerns now that I ordered my bac

Talk about luck...USPS lost my Bac package....FML

[Sticky]

Concerns now that I ordered my bac

A belated welcome Fishcake

Good luck with your bac journey.
Being in a sober house will help you stay AF but it will be hard being the only one taking bac. and you might get some flac! I had to give up my weekly AA meeting. I helped run a womens meeting in a rehab I went thru. My sponsor who set up the meeting supported my doing TSM and then bac. When she committed suicide Aug last year it turned out she had been abusing pain killers and drinking once a week for at least 2 years! No wonder she supported me.

Hubby uses an e-cigarette from the US. A friend of mind got him onto it. She has had a lot of success with it. Hubby has had some success but still succumbs to the real thing from time to time. And has had 2 heart attacks. So is in denial about the harmful effects, just like I am with my drinking! We ordered his e-cigs online as they're illegal in shops here. All we can get is ones which have no chemicals at all. His just has nicotine.

Take care
Sticky