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    #181
    Abstinence Challenge

    4 days to go. Unfortunately I don't think I can stay at this dose of 150. I have been here for about a month and I am still tired and not sleeping. I'm also a mile from motivated to wipe my own ass. I have to get more productive with my work and am tired of being awake all night. I will see how the drinking goes. But honestly I am on my last leg with these pills. A month has gone by. My body is never going to get used to this dose. And what if I need to go higher? I will never be able to go higher. I'm actually thinking (unfortunately) my personal solution is going to be to go down to 80 mg and stay there for 6 months or so in AA. After I get 6 months, I should have enough serenity to be able to come off baclofen for good. It is all going to depend on how I do after this 4 days. My problem in AA is always the first 90 days. I do very well after that. It will be neat to see how the next generation of drugs do ... I am sure they will take the brain aspect and drop the muscle relaxer part. Those will be nice.
    When you're riding in a time machine way far into the future, don't stick your elbow out the window, or it'll turn into a fossil.

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      #182
      Abstinence Challenge

      What are your cravings like now JD? I'm sorry the SEs are still so bad... especially insomnia.

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        #183
        Abstinence Challenge

        I'm excited about going to the game and having a few beers Monday, but I have zero cravings. I think I'm just worried about upping my dose because Neva is trying to jinx me. She's at home putting little beers around her jd doll.

        Dude I think I'm just worried this isn't going to work out. I really didnt want to go back to AA, but more so I really don't want to live life as a fuck up.
        When you're riding in a time machine way far into the future, don't stick your elbow out the window, or it'll turn into a fossil.

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          #184
          Abstinence Challenge

          Sunday, Sunday, Sunday!!! (think monster truck announcer)
          I have no plans for a celebratory cerveza and that is great. I'm not saying if I ran into something frosty on what will certainly be a hot mfer, I wouldn't enjoy it, but I can't even muster up a solid beer plan and that makes me happy. I don't care

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            #185
            Abstinence Challenge

            This IS going to work out JD. I think you got some great advice on that other thread btw. It was good for me to hear anyway.

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              #186
              Abstinence Challenge

              I'm glad u feel that way Juan. I'm going to be disappointed if questions ruffle feathers. Maybe I complain a lot. But I kinda need to know things on something this important.
              When you're riding in a time machine way far into the future, don't stick your elbow out the window, or it'll turn into a fossil.

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                #187
                Abstinence Challenge

                JDizzle;1533593 wrote: Neva is trying to jinx me. She's at home putting little beers around her jd doll.
                :H:H:H

                Mine next, please!

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                  #188
                  Abstinence Challenge

                  3 more days. Piece of cake.

                  Wow man. Seriously I have tried to get back in AA so many times and went to meetings everyday. I just could not get 30 days. Not once in this 27 days have I had an internal struggle to not drink. I have thought a drink would be nice, but I quickly tell myself I'm doing 30 days and the drink feeling passes with ease. I'm gonna change my name to switchDizzle. I am sticking around the forum too after this. I think that is what is best for me. I really like y'all.
                  When you're riding in a time machine way far into the future, don't stick your elbow out the window, or it'll turn into a fossil.

                  Comment

                    #189
                    Abstinence Challenge

                    I kinda feel the same way--only difference being I somewhere in the back of my head said 90 days. It hasn't been all that tough, and after the first couple weeks anxiety subsided, and I got myself off benzos, and lately sleep has pretty much returned.

                    Not sure what to do after this, though. I'm not taking bac, so drinking really is probably out of the question, but I don't know if this willpower or whatever it is will crumble after this summer. A teensy bit worried about that...

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                      #190
                      Abstinence Challenge

                      JDizzle;1534051 wrote: I'm gonna change my name to switchDizzle.
                      I much prefer "Minor Threat". Now that alcohol isn't killing you, you are now just a minor threat to yourself and others.

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                        #191
                        Abstinence Challenge

                        Woo Hoo JD

                        Great to hear, this place wouldn't be the same without your patter.

                        Urban Dictionary: patter
                        Honour Thyself

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                          #192
                          Abstinence Challenge

                          Saturday and Sunday. I have so much chore crap and work crap going on this weekend... Easy. Then again, I really don't need anything going on. I was just thinking I am so close that even if I wasn't taking baclofen, I would still make it. I could make it on pride alone.

                          Then I remembered something. A few times in AA I was on the home stretch of 30 days and didnt make it. Once, all I had to do was freakin go to sleep and I had 30 days and didnt do it. I was so proud to be able to go to the meeting the next day and pick up my red chip. I was excited to be able to show it to loved ones to give them a renewed hope that they finally had me back.... So sad man. I just couldn't stay sober another hour. I don't get down on myself for that...I feel bad for myself. A lot of those people r no longer in my life and I don't blame them one bit... God they tried so hard. Anyways, I'm depressing myself.. Actually maybe this is gratitude not depression... My feelings r all jacked up hahahaha.

                          Have any of u all seen that video that shows a ct scan of a brain wanting cocaine and that same brain being shown the cocaine triggers on baclofen? WOW!!! I'm sure it's the same for booze. When it wanted cocaine, the brain was lit up like Christmas. Jesus we did NOT stand a chance against that shit.
                          When you're riding in a time machine way far into the future, don't stick your elbow out the window, or it'll turn into a fossil.

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                            #193
                            Abstinence Challenge

                            30

                            Today I'm at day 30 of AF, which doesn't feel like a huge victory, by the way.

                            One reason is because it went almost effortless and the second reason is that I was AF for 50 days after I switched the first time.

                            I will do another 30 days so I will kick my personal record.
                            But I doubt it will feel like a victory anyway.

                            It's a bit like letting a computer play chess for you and the only thing you have to do is push the button.
                            That's wouldn't be much of a challenge, would it?

                            But anyway, I'm glad that my computer is controlled by baclofen, because without it, I would lose the game everytime.
                            I wouldn't want to have to do the challenge without being auto-piloted by baclofen.

                            So, I will congratulate myself today anyway. Not for the huge effort and determination that it cost me to complete this 30 days (on the contrary), but for the fact that I found baclofen, which really changed my life and allowed me to crawl out of the cesspit of alcohol, which would have drowned me eventually.
                            Today is the first day of the rest of my life.

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                              #194
                              Abstinence Challenge

                              Congrats to you X. Careful what you wish for! You may even develop an aversion to alcohol after sixty days. No joke.

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                                #195
                                Abstinence Challenge

                                Congrats xadrian. Man that's awesome. My abstinence record is 2 years... Forget shattering that. Year 2000 jd can have that freakin record!!
                                When you're riding in a time machine way far into the future, don't stick your elbow out the window, or it'll turn into a fossil.

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