anyone on nal/tsm

[bkyogagurl]

anyone on nal/tsm

Poink-

Thank you for being here. I needed to hear that right now. Never apologize for wanting the best for people. I like your passion. Even tho it isn't touchy feely just kidding I will probably tease you about that for a while because you seem like a caring person.
I think the majority of people here care and are compassionate.
I have found nothing but support here.

It sounds like you have been thru the ringer. I have tried Topa and it did work but made me feel like a fruit loop with a stuffed up nose and was losing my hair. So I gave up on it and turned back to trying to manage drinking on my own which didn't work out so good. I did some counseling which I think I could use more of. That is when I came back here. And started Nal. I am really interested to know your story. Do you have a thread where I can catch up? Sounds like you have had it tough. Anything you want to talk about- you can talk here. I think it helps hearing others daily thoughts and what makes them feel the way they do. Are you still drinking?

I think I would be scared to try bac. The side effects sound awful and I have 3 kids to care for & I need to be on my best game.

How is your health? Do you try to take care of yourself inside and out?

Thanks for your advice... I will read thru some of the other threads and I WILL NOT EVER GIVE UP! :thanks:
Got a little tear in my eye :l

[spuddleduck]

anyone on nal/tsm

bugger. just wrote a long post on laptop and its gone wonky so just.a.quick.check in on phone. survived Christmas for another year. will post.later if i can get this flipping things to work

[Jazi's Mum]

anyone on nal/tsm

Merry Christmas everyone. I've been reading a bit about spuddleduck's adventures and add my support to her and all of you. I've just started to journal today and will be continuing when I start baclofen. I know a lot about Naltrexone and I'm sure it will help you too. TSM is great for those who work it - it does take a lot of patience though eh?

I feel I must address something Poink wrote yesterday and I don't know where else to put this - does he have a journal? Here's what he wrote:

Recently I was taking 75mg/bac per day,250mg/topomax per day,1332mg/campral per day and ran out of nal a couple of days ago. I need to go full tilt boogie in some direction but can't fucking decide.

The topo and campral were prescribed by my shrink. The nal prescribed by a previous shrink and was sitting around. The bac also was just sitting around. I still believe that baclofen will be the answer, but I had a lot of problems with SE's before. I'm an alcoholic. Sometimes I would go up 50-100mg per week. I wanted the cure and I wanted it fucking NOW!

Forgive me for giving unsolicited advice, but please Poink, do some more reading on the Meds thread before you continue with all that you are taking!! The amount of bac is probably not helping you to stop drinking, especially combined with the other drugs. And you will read on the meds threads that it makes a huge difference with SE's by the way you titrate up the doses. Just piling on this over that is obviously not the answer for you. I don't want to interfere but please do more reading. There is a ton of experience all over this forum. Please take advantage of all those pioneers who have gone before.

Sorry to hijack this, spuddleduck, but don't know how else to reach Poink. JMum

[Poink]

anyone on nal/tsm

To continue the jack, I have read most of what has been written here for the last several years. At the time of my brain injury a year ago I was doing HDB @ about 230mg/day and nal at 50mg/day.

Am not ready to go back to HDB yet because of the SEs. I had been thinking really hard about the liquid form because so many people reported less SEs. A lot of the new research being done and patents being taken out combine two or more of these drugs. And again, the only things I have added to what my shrink has prescribed is LDB (of which there actually is a lot of research showing that it helps) and nal, both of which have very high safety profiles. The nal has run out so am not sure if I will go back with that or not.

I do appreciate your concern, but I read and consider everything. I make a number of wrong decisions, but they have been thought out. Baclofen research is going in two main directions: HDB, and Bac and (something). I don't know what level the bac will be in the various bac+ researches, but right now this is about as high as I am ready to go. Most LDB studies were done at 30-60/mg per day.

Anyway, hijack over. Sorry folks. I wish all of you safe journeys on whichever road you take.

[YouKayBee]

anyone on nal/tsm

Hey everyone just to let you know I'm still here, just can't think of anything to post right now!:H

[spuddleduck]

anyone on nal/tsm

still having problems with laptop so I will post this now to see if it works

[spuddleduck]

anyone on nal/tsm

wehey it worked. its really annoying when you write thoughts down and they go flying off into the unknown. maybe my posts are lost somewhere in a computer ball of fluff.
anyway, poink, thanks for your support. im afraid ukb is right in saying that I tend to get a bit extreme when I drink.... unfortunately it has landed me in hospital in the past from a spot of silliness harming myself. I do try not to post when im pissed, hiding phone/computer from myself but I think I am a very determined/devious drunk... even with myself.
jazis mum/poink, no worries about hijacking this thread its always good to hear other peoples views... and poink although I know very little about all the meds, it does seem you have a fair cocktail going on, but as I say I no expert on the subject,
down to the drinking business, as I posted on Christmas day I took 50mg approx. 2 hours before drinking. by the time I returned home to a very drunk mr spud I actually didn't feel that bothered about drinking but guess what...... I drank. maybe it was because it was Christmas, maybe it was cos mr spud was drunk or maybe it was just 'any bloody excuse I could think of' . it didn't go too well as I drank far too much and not particularly slowly. perhaps it was the baileys and Cointreau (no it doesn't curdle) that slipped down to easily. needless to say I spend boxing day under the duvet feeling crap. I must say bkyoga (and others who have children to look after) I don't know how you do it. I really do feel completely incapacitated after drinking. just about managed to feed myelf never mind anyone else. I have to say im very pleased that I haven't had the awful vomiting like the first time I took nal.. I don't think I could have continued taking it if it was like that too often. just reading here and around the boards a bit it does seem that a fair few of us have some 'back story/history' that could in some ways have affected how we are, though having said that I believe that there is more to it, like imbalance in brain chemicals or whatever (sorry, that sounds lame but you know what I mean). I cant believe that I am such a weak/lazy/etc etc person to succumb to alcoholism just because life hasn't always been peachy. I know I have been strong in so many ways over my and still am.... its just this bloody alcohol lark that seems to be such a tough one to get a grip on. this has turned into a bit of a ramble so I will post it before it gets lost again

[spuddleduck]

anyone on nal/tsm

mr spuds gave me a fabulous new toy for Christmas. a fitbit wristband. I didn't have a clue what it was but its a fancy gadget thingy that you wear to keep track of your activity/calories.etc. it even tracks your sleep, (which is the bit I like the sound of). ukb it think you would love this, if you haven't already got one, as you can make graphs and records of everything and I get the feeling you like that sort of thing. I always find when Im more active/healthy eating I am less inclined to drink as much so hopefully this will encourage me to get off the sofa and take the dog out more often.... which is exactly what I did today. up a hill nearby in a very very windy day... but it felt good and I came home and had a nice cup of hot chocolate..... much better than booze.
I had been planning on going out drinking tomorrow night as there is an event on that I quite fancy but im going to try and hold off as it seems a bit too soon after my Christmas day drink. just got to keep trying, im still pleased that I have stuck to the 'take nal EVERYTIME I drink rule'... now all I have to do is get my willpower toned up a bit as I have not yet made the choice to put my drink down or stop, even though ive felt like I could, if that makes sense. perhaps just being aware of these feelings is a start. ive tried other ways and failed so I see this as another opportunity to find my way out

[spuddleduck]

anyone on nal/tsm

oh and I don't think I imagined it bkyoga but did I read somewhere it was your birthday.

so ....HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY..... I think.

[Jazi's Mum]

anyone on nal/tsm

Hi spuddleduck - yes!!!! that feeling that you could stop is what it's all about - even if you don't. That's the next step, and you'll get there.

The Sinclair Method is all about letting the naltrexone work in the brain - that is what you are doing. It would be great if you could just stop drinking. But if you could do that you would have done it already no? :H And you wouldn't have to take the naltrexone. :H:H

There will come a time when you can stop before you get totally plastered and you'll feel so good about it - then once will become twice etc.

Don't forget the tremendous handicap you have with poor Mr. Spud drinking. I know just how hard that is. If you were at a beautiful ski chalet in Switzerland, all by yourself, with lovely food, massage therapy for the asking, lots of sunshine and fresh air, totally calm atmosphere, with nothing to do but read, watch a few flicks, take walks, and then get into a warm feather bed for about 3 months - bet you would do just dandy on the drinking front.

So be good to yourself. Do the best you can under your circumstances. You'll get where you want to be. :h

[bkyogagurl]

anyone on nal/tsm

UK- Nice of you to stop in even if you don't have anything to say.:thanks2:

Spud- you sweetie pie. Thanks for the birthday wishes. Sounds like you and I have been on the same page again. You sound good and so cool the Mr. Spud got you an interesting fitness gadget. I feel the same way- when I am running and eating healthy I feel less like drinking and destroying my body-
Please don't judge yourself by feeling weak/lazy because of life not being peachy. It's ok that you had hard times that may be affecting you now. You are such a good person being here with me. I judge myself way to much but I plan to be more gentle with myself. I was talking to Skull a bit because I was feeling bummed about my drunk on Xmas and this is what advice he gave me:
If you don't mind some unsoclicited advice-- I'd encourage you to try, best as you can, to shift your mindset away from judging yourself when you drink. It's really hard not to judge ourselves, I know, but try to be gentle with yourself. You're not a failure when you drink. You're a person dealing with an illness and you're on the long journey of becoming healthy. There will inevitably be bad days but try to look at the longer picture of becoming well, and be gentle with yourself. You deserve health, wellness, support, and love, just as much as any one of us!
This is for us.

I had a rough day as I said on Xmas & spent most my day in bed and on the couch the day after but I am going to look at it as I had a day to watch movies & relax. It is tough with my kids and that is why I rarely ever have been in bed all day. My husband has been a saint as of late and helps me when I need it. I think it really is helping me heal. He makes me feel loved and I really like that.
I was planning on taking AFdays until New Year's Eve but my husband wanted to have some friends over and he has been so great lately I wanted to entertain him. So I took my Nal & I did drink but only about 3-4 drink and I never felt buzzed. It makes me so happy when I drink like this. It makes me feel like I am getting closer and closer to breaking the chains.
I'm super tired as it's 1:21 am here so I will talk tomorrow.

Hi JM- thanks for stopping by.

[spuddleduck]

anyone on nal/tsm

o poo, yet again a long post has disappeared, not sure why but I presume its me not the computer so I will post in short bursts. jazimum, thanks for stopping by, your thoughts are appreciated. have you tried nal/tsm, you obviously know how it works and yes at least having the feeling that I could stop is a start (does that make sense). I never never never feel like that without nal. next all i need to do is put that feeling into action. i have a couple of times left drink after nal but im not quite sure what the 'equation' is that made it happen. perhaps a little more effort on my part.

[spuddleduck]

anyone on nal/tsm

i love the vision of the chalet and calm environment. although like most i started out drinking for social confidence i have definitely become what i call an emotional/reactive drinker, basically turning to the bottle instead of dealing with a problem. i read somewhere that when we stop drinking we start to grow up, as we haven't actually learned how to deal with problems when we just blot them out with booze. perhaps i should ask my doc for a prescription for the lovely vision on the chalet and massage. sure it would work a treat. even just cleaning the house makes me feel less inclined to drink. the state of my bedroom generally reflects the state of my mind, though im not sure which comes first, i guess its my bad mind feeling crap so not caring about how my surroundings are. my personal hygiene tends to go a bit tits up as well.

[spuddleduck]

anyone on nal/tsm

sorry for all these posts but im fed up with losing my long ones. i love what skull said to bkyoga about not being too harsh and judging yourself. although some would say you need to be harsh, kick up backside etc, my default emotion is being harshly judgemental on myself. i actually find it a lot harder to be kind/gentle to myself. this is something that came up when i had cbt councelling, i find it very hard not to judge myself harshly about drinking, or in fact anything. strange but now and again i get fiercely proud of myself, blowing my own trumpet..... now if only i could get a happy in the middle place.
bkyoga its great that hubby is helping and supporting you, don't forget to tell him how much you appreciate it and its fantastic that you only had a few drinks. what an amazing feeling eh.

[spuddleduck]

anyone on nal/tsm

ukb, going back to your post about bullying and eating. the bullying sounds really awful, sad as it is there is probably still a lot of it goes on and im sure that things like that in early years can very much affect how we are in later years. if you think about how open our minds are to learning at such young ages i guess its not only the good stuff like algebra (ha ha) that we learn but also the bad stuff. never really thought of it like that but it has to be true, there are so many of us here with 'back' issues i really cant believe we are just looking for excuses for our problems, as we know there are some very strong and determined people here.
i was supposed to be going out tonight, a planned drinking outside in the big world as opposed to the safety of my own four walls at home but im giving it a miss. im still feeling a bit shitty inside about things and can be almost certain i would end up a drunken, snot slinging, blubbering drunk...... so instead im going out for an alcohol free meal with mr spud. i have tried twice recently to go out for a meal and drink but for me drinking equates to not eating and i have left most of my food (well taken it home in a doggy bag) so this will be a much nicer experience. now i just need to go and get some activity registered on my magic fitbit machine. not sure how it works and i do wonder if i just keep waving my arm about it will say im being really active. hmmmm!