anyone on nal/tsm

[spuddleduck]

anyone on nal/tsm

tee hee jazimum, I like that, lets all just blather on. in the past I have been nervous about what I post and how it will be taken (yep we all seem to have insecurities). at the moment im just happy 'blathering' on and rambling.
im fairly happy with how new years eve went. I only took 25mg as the other half that I though was in my bag wasn't there. it was about 2.5hours from pill to drink and as I said I actually left most of a couple of drinks (well donated them to mr spuds) that is totally unheard of, I would down whatever was in my glass. I definitely drank slower and at least for the first part of the evening was very aware of myself. it really is normally only about an hour from starting drink to becoming a jabbering mess. I don't actually remember posting here when I got home but I obviously did. so yes there is still a long way to go but I do feel im taking positive steps.
bk'not'yoga.. sounds like you are taking some major steps with the addiction centre and psych evaluation... id be scared to hell... I had councelling and went to a 'drink shrink' back in 2010 and I didn't really get on with it. found it really scary..... why I don't know as they are there to help. don't feel bad about yourself, your are trying hard to do something about this horrid addiction/disease. what more could you ask from yourself. the fact that you are here.... and posting...... and trying tsm .... and supporting others is fantastic so keep smiling and keep posting, we all need each other here.

[spuddleduck]

anyone on nal/tsm

I spent new years day mostly under my duvet, eating crap and watching crap on telly. eating up the last of my Christmas snacks so intend now having a bit of a healthy eating plan. I always feel better about myself and less inclined to drink when im eating well and exercising. ive been in a lot of pain for a few years with back problems. on new years eve I had a facet joint steroid injection procedure and im over the moon with the results. it may only last weeks/months but I will be taking advantage of the pain relief to get some more activity in (bring on the endorphins). as for drinking goals, I will be happy for now if I can drink only once a week and always with nal. any better than that will be a bonus, any worse and I will give myself a serious talking to. having said that I was tempted today. my mum isnt so well mentally at the moment and we (sister and I) have had to get power of atourney sorted out in case things get worse. sister has gone back to Greece where she lives and has taken mum with her for a break and a change. after I saw them off on the train I just felt like a large glass of something (alcohol). fortunately by the time I drove home, doing a bit of shopping on the way I saw sense and took dog out for a walk instead..... phew, well swerved.

[bkyogagurl]

anyone on nal/tsm

Good job Spud- I'm sorry to hear your mum is struggling. Was it hard to let her go with your sis or did you need the break? And I'm so glad to hear your back is feeling better. Exercise is always a help for me.

I'm doing pretty good. The anxiety from drinking for almost 2 weeks straight is wearing off slowly. Usually takes me 3-4 day to actually feel grounded again. I am on day 2 of my AF plan. My kids are home so it's makes it much easier to stay on track because I want to spend quality time with them. I really am looking forward to experiencing a whole month off as I wonder if I will miss alcohol or love the way I feel without it.
Got all the Xmas stuff put away. Going to run to the store and get some vegi's to juice. I am thinking I will juice once a day this month. Anyway I hope you are having a good evening.

[spuddleduck]

anyone on nal/tsm

bkyoga, just read back at your earlier post... a phrase I have used a lot... alcohol taking the edge off. it sounds like you get anxious, I know I certainly do..i can get nervous about the most ridiculous small things.... though im pretty good at putting a strong face on. I think in addressing our alcohol issues we have to address who we are, and learning to be comfortable with that person, yeah I can talk the talk but not so good about putting it into practice. ill be following your progress on the January af thread. just curious, will you be using nal during this time. I have found it can make me feel a bit yukky so if there is the slightest temptation it would maybe help.
as for my mum, I am really glad she has gone with my sister, hopefully the change of scenery will help her as she is just rattling around the house at home. my dad had been ill for a long time and she was 24/7 looking after him, that and him being a grumpy shouty man she has sort of lost her purpose..... and the house is very quiet (I would call it beautifully peaceful).
the weekend is coming up and I think im over the days of thinking 'oh its the weekend... I gotta drink cos that's what you do at the weekend'. I guess the fact im not working at the moment helps with that.
my back is still marvellous (as it should be for a while I hope) so ive taken advantage of it and started with a bit of exercise, nothing too strenuous as I don't want to do too much too soon. I tend to get impatient and go hell for leather and then regret it. at least I know the difference between good pain, as in working hard, and bad pain, as in damaging my poor old bod.

[spuddleduck]

anyone on nal/tsm

its 3rd of January and i haven't made any new year resolutions as such, though i have been thinking about improvements i can make to myself. im not making any promises to myself regarding al other than what i have already committed to with nal, ALWAYS take nal before drinking and try to keep drinking to once a week, that's enough for now. Now i have a bit of relief from my back pain i will be stepping up the exercise, not too difficult as i am lucky to actually enjoy exercise but i am out of the routine of it. i will also be eating less crap than i have been. my diabetes has gone a bit tits up so i will be focussing more on getting things back as they should be. helping with all this i have my fancy new gadget which measures activity (just walking really). the computer record gives me a place to log all of this info, activity, food, blood pressure, blood glucose, sleep (my fave) and i add other options such as alcohol intake. as im not working at the moment i have the time to spend on self improvement. all these things make me less inclined towards alcohol so its a win win plan.
just remembered another important goal is to get out of bed earlier. i have drifted into very late sleeping, often getting on for mid day before i get going. this in turn affects my sleep the next day. i know it doesn't really matter as i don't have to be anywhere or do anything but it just doesn't feel right when i am trying to get things in order. ill never be a morning lark but surely i can get my arse out of bed before lunch time.

[YouKayBee]

anyone on nal/tsm

spuddleduck;1607222 wrote: its 3rd of January and i haven't made any new year resolutions as such, though i have been thinking about improvements i can make to myself. im not making any promises to myself regarding al other than what i have already committed to with nal, ALWAYS take nal before drinking and try to keep drinking to once a week, that's enough for now. Now i have a bit of relief from my back pain i will be stepping up the exercise, not too difficult as i am lucky to actually enjoy exercise but i am out of the routine of it. i will also be eating less crap than i have been. my diabetes has gone a bit tits up so i will be focussing more on getting things back as they should be. helping with all this i have my fancy new gadget which measures activity (just walking really). the computer record gives me a place to log all of this info, activity, food, blood pressure, blood glucose, sleep (my fave) and i add other options such as alcohol intake. as im not working at the moment i have the time to spend on self improvement. all these things make me less inclined towards alcohol so its a win win plan.
just remembered another important goal is to get out of bed earlier. i have drifted into very late sleeping, often getting on for mid day before i get going. this in turn affects my sleep the next day. i know it doesn't really matter as i don't have to be anywhere or do anything but it just doesn't feel right when i am trying to get things in order. ill never be a morning lark but surely i can get my arse out of bed before lunch time.

Sounds good to me Spuds, I don't hold with resolutions because I think any day is a good enough day to start something new.

If you get up earlier you can get more daylight in, not a bad thing this time of year. New habits are good, hope you keep this up and keep on nal ing.

[bkyogagurl]

anyone on nal/tsm

Hi Spud~

I love it when you sound so good. Its funny cause as a mom and wife myself I think that a quiet house would be nice but I bet I will feel like your mum when its all said and done. Does your mum have a hobby of any kind?
The kids went to my outlaws for a few days so I was able to clean the entire house and it stayed that way for a day or two. It was nice but having the kids home is much nicer. I don't care if they brought tons of laundry I should be doing right now...
I will use Nal if I get an overwhelming urge to drink during my AF month but I won't be taking it otherwise. I am going to try some glutamine powder in my juice and see if that curbs any unwanted urges. I am feeling solid with my committment but the only troubling situation I can foresee is a funeral I will be attending mid month. Its in my home town and all my friends are there and they are all big drinkers. I have all ready started thinking about different plans as to avoid the party so to speak. Its unfortunate because I would love to see everyone but there will alcohol probably everywhere. I am hoping I will be able to say NO. NO. NO. I usually say I'm training for something but then cave. I don't want to do that.
I have been sleeping late too...???? I can hardly get out of bed in the morn. The kids are on break so I don't have too. I try to tell myself its ok to rest but I feel like I should be out of bed. When the kids are in school I get up at 6am every morning. And I have my little routine of getting them to school and then going for a run. I have not ran since they have been out on break almost 2 weeks. I need to get back to it. My motivation as been lacking. I made an appointment with a new doctor to get a physical and see if she will support my Nal prescripton. I have plenty for now but would hate to run out.
I better get going as this is getting long and I want to go for a run and play with my kiddos.
Hope you are having a fabulous day.:l

HUgs to you too UK.

[YouKayBee]

anyone on nal/tsm

bkyogagurl;1607400 wrote: Hi Spud~

I love it when you sound so good. Its funny cause as a mom and wife myself I think that a quiet house would be nice but I bet I will feel like your mum when its all said and done. Does your mum have a hobby of any kind?
The kids went to my outlaws for a few days so I was able to clean the entire house and it stayed that way for a day or two. It was nice but having the kids home is much nicer. I don't care if they brought tons of laundry I should be doing right now...
I will use Nal if I get an overwhelming urge to drink during my AF month but I won't be taking it otherwise. I am going to try some glutamine powder in my juice and see if that curbs any unwanted urges. I am feeling solid with my committment but the only troubling situation I can foresee is a funeral I will be attending mid month. Its in my home town and all my friends are there and they are all big drinkers. I have all ready started thinking about different plans as to avoid the party so to speak. Its unfortunate because I would love to see everyone but there will alcohol probably everywhere. I am hoping I will be able to say NO. NO. NO. I usually say I'm training for something but then cave. I don't want to do that.
I have been sleeping late too...???? I can hardly get out of bed in the morn. The kids are on break so I don't have too. I try to tell myself its ok to rest but I feel like I should be out of bed. When the kids are in school I get up at 6am every morning. And I have my little routine of getting them to school and then going for a run. I have not ran since they have been out on break almost 2 weeks. I need to get back to it. My motivation as been lacking. I made an appointment with a new doctor to get a physical and see if she will support my Nal prescripton. I have plenty for now but would hate to run out.
I better get going as this is getting long and I want to go for a run and play with my kiddos.
Hope you are having a fabulous day.:l

HUgs to you too UK.

It's good you've identified the funeral, events where booze and drinkers are around can be very stressful.

[spuddleduck]

anyone on nal/tsm

'It's good you've identified the funeral, events where booze and drinkers are around can be very stressful'

too true ukb, at least being aware of possible triggers gives us a decent warning so we have no excuse not to take our pill.
bkyoga, you think I sound good, you sound bloomin' marvellous. amazing what a few af days can do. I suppose its partly a big relief for us that the 'party' season is over. a lot of people (non problem/alkie drinkers) also try to cut down in January after the excesses of Christmas so there is less pressure from others. as for my mum, yes, she loves her bowling, and in the winter when they don't play they all get together for a 'games' afternoon. since she retired she has done loads of night classes (painting, crafts), this is why its so sad to see her down in the dumps with no interest in anything. hopefully this break in Greece with sis will perk her up a bit. it feels wrong to say it but im glad/relieved she has gone as i was getting to the point of dreading the phone ringing wondering what she was up to. i feel im the one that's having a holiday.
i had a twinge of a craving yesterday and broke my rule that i would TAKE NAL STRAIGHT AWAY. i didn't take it (why???????) but fortunately it passed and i jumped on my treadmill for some sweaty walking... much better option,

[skullbabyland]

anyone on nal/tsm

bkyogagurl;1607400 wrote: Hi Spud~

I love it when you sound so good. Its funny cause as a mom and wife myself I think that a quiet house would be nice but I bet I will feel like your mum when its all said and done. Does your mum have a hobby of any kind?
The kids went to my outlaws for a few days so I was able to clean the entire house and it stayed that way for a day or two. It was nice but having the kids home is much nicer. I don't care if they brought tons of laundry I should be doing right now...
I will use Nal if I get an overwhelming urge to drink during my AF month but I won't be taking it otherwise. I am going to try some glutamine powder in my juice and see if that curbs any unwanted urges. I am feeling solid with my committment but the only troubling situation I can foresee is a funeral I will be attending mid month. Its in my home town and all my friends are there and they are all big drinkers. I have all ready started thinking about different plans as to avoid the party so to speak. Its unfortunate because I would love to see everyone but there will alcohol probably everywhere. I am hoping I will be able to say NO. NO. NO. I usually say I'm training for something but then cave. I don't want to do that.
I have been sleeping late too...???? I can hardly get out of bed in the morn. The kids are on break so I don't have too. I try to tell myself its ok to rest but I feel like I should be out of bed. When the kids are in school I get up at 6am every morning. And I have my little routine of getting them to school and then going for a run. I have not ran since they have been out on break almost 2 weeks. I need to get back to it. My motivation as been lacking. I made an appointment with a new doctor to get a physical and see if she will support my Nal prescripton. I have plenty for now but would hate to run out.
I better get going as this is getting long and I want to go for a run and play with my kiddos.
Hope you are having a fabulous day.:l

HUgs to you too UK.

Hi BK- a thought on the upcoming funeral- First, so sorry to hear that you've lost someone. Obviously grief can be a very triggering time for us to drink. Add that to the funeral in your hometown with drinking friends, and it's likely that ANY of us would want to drink, especially if you've always given in, historically speaking, around those friends/places, in spite of best intentions to remain sober.

Just brainstorming here, but could you put anything in place to help remain sober? Emily, a member here, once planned to remain sober through a bachelorette party drinking bender with her friends by bringing a bottle or two of her own wine- which she purchased, then dumped the wine out and replaced it with AF wine. She brought that with her and drank it through the event. It appeared to everyone else that she was drinking as usual- and thus she didn't have to deal with any "c'mon why aren't you drinking with us?" conversations at all. Peer pressure- gone. Helped her deal with not giving in to drinking alcohol.

Just a thought. Could something like this, or any other moves, help you to remain sober through this event?

EDIT- as you know, if you do drink, have your Nal ready

[YouKayBee]

anyone on nal/tsm

spuddleduck;1607720 wrote: 'It's good you've identified the funeral, events where booze and drinkers are around can be very stressful'

too true ukb, at least being aware of possible triggers gives us a decent warning so we have no excuse not to take our pill.
bkyoga, you think I sound good, you sound bloomin' marvellous. amazing what a few af days can do. I suppose its partly a big relief for us that the 'party' season is over. a lot of people (non problem/alkie drinkers) also try to cut down in January after the excesses of Christmas so there is less pressure from others. as for my mum, yes, she loves her bowling, and in the winter when they don't play they all get together for a 'games' afternoon. since she retired she has done loads of night classes (painting, crafts), this is why its so sad to see her down in the dumps with no interest in anything. hopefully this break in Greece with sis will perk her up a bit. it feels wrong to say it but im glad/relieved she has gone as i was getting to the point of dreading the phone ringing wondering what she was up to. i feel im the one that's having a holiday.
i had a twinge of a craving yesterday and broke my rule that i would TAKE NAL STRAIGHT AWAY. i didn't take it (why???????) but fortunately it passed and i jumped on my treadmill for some sweaty walking... much better option,

Glad your craving passed, they usually do!

Speaking about post-Christmas it's also supposed to be a bad time for relapses, you relax because the party season is over, and think phew, what's the harm I deserve one - then all hell breaks loose. I was told Easter is a big time for rehab intakes and this is the reason. Might not be true but I know I would usually manage to stay sober Christmas Day but some of my worst times were early December and mid January.

Hope you and BK stay safe during this time.

[spuddleduck]

anyone on nal/tsm

ukb, the post Christmas relapse makes sense, all the effort being put into getting through the 'party season' then wham. as we know it can be too easy to take your eye off the ball and get complacent.Today I had more sense than yesterday. I got outa bed earlier and was very busy doing some much needed jobs. A brisk walk along the canal with the dog, a healthy meal and then whhooaah out of the blue another crazy craving. today AS SOON AS IT HIT ME I TOOK MY NAL, only 25mg as a just in case dose. after waiting out the hour and reading a bit here the urge passed, so that's another drunk swerved. I think part of it was because again I know today was my last 'free to drink' day till Wednesday at the earliest. I also think part of my being able to resist drinking tonight is that I am enjoying being able to move and exercise more since my back injections and feel able to see a healthier, more active me so I don't want to waste a day with a hangover which is almost inevitable when I drink.

[bkyogagurl]

anyone on nal/tsm

spuddleduck;1607720 wrote: 'It's good you've identified the funeral, events where booze and drinkers are around can be very stressful'

too true ukb, at least being aware of possible triggers gives us a decent warning so we have no excuse not to take our pill.
bkyoga, you think I sound good, you sound bloomin' marvellous. amazing what a few af days can do. I suppose its partly a big relief for us that the 'party' season is over. a lot of people (non problem/alkie drinkers) also try to cut down in January after the excesses of Christmas so there is less pressure from others. as for my mum, yes, she loves her bowling, and in the winter when they don't play they all get together for a 'games' afternoon. since she retired she has done loads of night classes (painting, crafts), this is why its so sad to see her down in the dumps with no interest in anything. hopefully this break in Greece with sis will perk her up a bit. it feels wrong to say it but im glad/relieved she has gone as i was getting to the point of dreading the phone ringing wondering what she was up to. i feel im the one that's having a holiday.
i had a twinge of a craving yesterday and broke my rule that i would TAKE NAL STRAIGHT AWAY. i didn't take it (why???????) but fortunately it passed and i jumped on my treadmill for some sweaty walking... much better option,

Spud- I am feeling really good and proud that I am taking on this challenge. So cute your mum bowls. That is awesome. It's not wrong to want some space for you. I think it would be hard to deal with mum especially if she is a bit sad because her life has changed to a completely different pace than she is used too. It will be so good for her to be in Greece and doing new things. I mean how fun does that sound.
I'm so proud of you for recognizing your cravings and staying on track with the Nal.
And all this exercise you are getting in.. Are you going to turn into a super model on me.

:l

[bkyogagurl]

anyone on nal/tsm

UK- thanks for the heads up. I think being aware is half the battle. I am still going to just shoot for 31 days because I am already starting the- well maybe I should try 40 but I'm getting to far ahead of myself. ODAT works best for me. But I am feeling good and it's weird because I am not really thinking about drinking because I said I wasn't going to so I haven't notice any cravings. Hmph. But I do really well for 2 weeks then something happens & cravings return. I think it is imperative that I make this whole month as it was just as important when I made the first week AF then moved on to being able to be AF 2 weeks- does that make sense? If I could start going a whole month between drinks that is another step closer.

Skull-
Very good ideas and I actually have thought about it. A couple things tho.. I don't want to lie about how I am and what I am doing. I have tried that and it just doesn't work for me. And if I tried to take AF wine most likely my friends would be drinking it too and would most definitely notice unless I could wait til they were drunk. Another is my husband is supposed to be on board with me this month and he would wonder why I was making such an effort. It's a bit complicated. He has friends as well there who are heavy drinkers and I wonder if he will cave. I have a feeling he will be drinking. Such a bummer for me. I just wish I could be honest and say "hey I'm not drinking because I don't want to" and that may very well be exactly what I say. I'm sick of it.
Maybe if they see how good I am doing and looking they will follow me..... HA!! Just kidding.

I'm gonna start eating clean again too.. Damn Chocolate chip cookies anyway. Baby steps.

I need to get my butt in my tights and running shoes and hit the road.
Thanks for being here friends- it warms my heart and helps me more than any of you will ever understand. :l

[spuddleduck]

anyone on nal/tsm

ha ha bkyoga, think it may be another couple of weeks before I become supermodel,duck,, hmm superduck, I like that. Actually I do feel a bit superduck today, all in all I achieved all I wanted to, had a bloomin good walk and swerved a drink and took nal in case so yeppedidee to me.
a thought about the funeral drinking, a half truth I have used in difficult situations such as this is that im not drinking as im feeling a bit emotional about it all and don't want to drink and get upset. for me it is a sort of truth as people who know me know I often end up a snot slinging (love it), upset tearful drunk. so as its a funeral that would be a good get out of drinking (why the hell do we have to make excuses for refusing to drink the poison).
funnily enough skull I did as you suggested once and got away with it. as it was sparkling af juice I was drinking it pretty quickly, people presumed I was necking the wine and it was commented how 'tipsy' I was...... oh really, that was a real eye opener, heres me thinking I cant socialise sober.
although Im not joining in on the sober January im popping in and keeping an eye on you lot over on the thread and cheering you all the way