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    May be close to the switch

    So ever since I started baclofen, I've been wondering what the switch would feel like. Last night, I came home and finally parked myself on my couch at around midnight with a 16 oz. beer. I got a pleasant little buzz after drinking a third of it and decided I didn't need the rest and poured it out. Today, I had dinner with a close old college friend as his family. His dad offered me a drink at the bar, which I should have politely declined, but the social drinking thing is going to be an ongoing effort. I was able to nurse a single pint of beer through the two hour dinner. The odd thing is that I didn't even really want it and didn't care about catching a buzz. I came home and saw a half pint of vodka sitting on my dresser, and briefly considered chugging it and decided I didn't need to do it. It's truly amazing given that just a few months ago I would stay drunk for weeks on end. You truly do become indifferent to alcohol. Hopefully these are not just isolated incidents, but I'm going to keep going up until a definite pattern is established - oh and I'm only at 90mg on the liquid. Thank you Lo0p and Dr. Levin.
    In the middle of my life's journey, I found myself in a dark wood, as I had lost the straight path. It is a difficult thing to speak about, how wild, harsh and impenetrable that wood is. Just thinking about it recreates the fear. It is scarcely less bitter than death, but in order to tell of the good that I found there, I must tell of the other things I saw there. --Dante, paraphrased

    #2
    May be close to the switch

    Wow. Sooo happy for you Alky!!
    Yeah you've broken the spell. Good for you!

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      #3
      May be close to the switch

      Alky;1591898 wrote: It's truly amazing given that just a few months ago I would stay drunk for weeks on end. You truly do become indifferent to alcohol. Hopefully these are not just isolated incidents, but I'm going to keep going up until a definite pattern is established - oh and I'm only at 90mg on the liquid. Thank you Lo0p and Dr. Levin.
      It is amazing, isn't it? Indifference is actually pretty indescribable. And no, they're not isolated. It'll just keep happening. That doesn't mean it's all effortless and blah, blah, blah...I know you've been around here long enough and read around here thoroughly enough to know it's still a disease and it still takes some effort. The difference, of course, is indifference. Yay, you!

      I just noticed you're in Florida. I thought you were in Iowa? Or is that just your alma mater? I spent a summer I don't remember in Iowa City in 1989. I loved it there. In no small part because of the corn-fed midwestern boys, the heady thinker/writers, and the all nighters at that bar owned by that spectacular gay guy. I'm sure you know the one.

      Glad you're doing so well, Alky.

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        #4
        May be close to the switch

        Thank you all for your words of support. I often wondered whether I would know when I hit the switch. It's pretty obvious when you're there, or at least get close.
        In the middle of my life's journey, I found myself in a dark wood, as I had lost the straight path. It is a difficult thing to speak about, how wild, harsh and impenetrable that wood is. Just thinking about it recreates the fear. It is scarcely less bitter than death, but in order to tell of the good that I found there, I must tell of the other things I saw there. --Dante, paraphrased

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          #5
          May be close to the switch

          Alky,

          Good for you! Yep, that's how it goes. It sounds like a Thanksgiving you'll remember--both ways because of bac!

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            #6
            May be close to the switch

            Ne/Neva Eva;1591971 wrote: I just noticed you're in Florida. I thought you were in Iowa? Or is that just your alma mater? I spent a summer I don't remember in Iowa City in 1989. I loved it there. In no small part because of the corn-fed midwestern boys, the heady thinker/writers, and the all nighters at that bar owned by that spectacular gay guy. I'm sure you know the one.
            Are you referring to George's the old-school bohemian dive bar with the spectacular cheeseburgers where you could actually have an intelligent, intellectual conversations? That was a great place. I don't think I've come across anything particularly like it since.

            I came to Florida to pursue doctoral studies about a year or so after I finished at Iowa and have been here ever since.
            In the middle of my life's journey, I found myself in a dark wood, as I had lost the straight path. It is a difficult thing to speak about, how wild, harsh and impenetrable that wood is. Just thinking about it recreates the fear. It is scarcely less bitter than death, but in order to tell of the good that I found there, I must tell of the other things I saw there. --Dante, paraphrased

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              #7
              May be close to the switch

              Good and bad news today. Met up with my friend one last time before he returns home for one last hurrah. By the time I saw him (we used to binge drink HEAVILY in college, by the way), he had a nice frosty pint of Bitburger Pilsner waiting for me (he knows I got hooked on Central European pilsners the summer I spent in the Czech Republic). I drank it faster than the generic microbrew yesterday just because I really do enjoy the taste of that beer, although still much slower than before when it would have been gone in 5-10 minutes). Anyway, got a pleasant little buzz going after that one beer. After I dropped him off at his hotel, I stopped at a Wawa (east coast convenience store/fast food chain) for a quesadilla and decided to get a 16 oz single "for the road" as I would have done in the old days. Looked at it down in the cup holder and once again decided, no, I don't need it. I think a definite pattern forming.

              The bad is the side effects are bothersome for the first time. They're not bad when I'm up and on my feet, but when I'm sitting down, I start to feel foggy, like I might pass out. I'm going to stay at the 90mg dose until the side effects disappear, and start going down unless I slip and have another binge. Which in that case I'll start going up again.
              In the middle of my life's journey, I found myself in a dark wood, as I had lost the straight path. It is a difficult thing to speak about, how wild, harsh and impenetrable that wood is. Just thinking about it recreates the fear. It is scarcely less bitter than death, but in order to tell of the good that I found there, I must tell of the other things I saw there. --Dante, paraphrased

              Comment


                #8
                May be close to the switch

                Wow, Alky great news for you!!! I too am at 90 mgs a day. No switch yet for me though, but I am hopeful it will happen for me soon. Keep posting so we know how you are doing!

                Calikime

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                  #9
                  May be close to the switch

                  Thanks Calikime! Yesterday was my first completely AF day (I only had one beer each of the previous two days). But what was remarkable about yesterday was I had my first full-blown panic attack, which would have normally induced me to take a slug of vodka. Instead, as per the French prescribing guide's instructions to take additional bac when there is a strong urge to drink, I took an another 10mg of bac and my panic and urge to drink quickly subsided. The impenetrable fog of the previous day had also lifted into more of a "warm glow." Given that this is a busy time at work, unless I slip and have another binge, I'm going to stay where I'm at for the time being. I can't have another day like two days ago.
                  In the middle of my life's journey, I found myself in a dark wood, as I had lost the straight path. It is a difficult thing to speak about, how wild, harsh and impenetrable that wood is. Just thinking about it recreates the fear. It is scarcely less bitter than death, but in order to tell of the good that I found there, I must tell of the other things I saw there. --Dante, paraphrased

                  Comment


                    #10
                    May be close to the switch

                    Won't have much, if any time to post tomorrow, so here goes with the latest. Yesterday, had awful SEs again and was considering going back down to 75 from 90, but the SEs improved as the day went on. Today was ok. An absolute first in my relationship with my wife since we started dating - SHE finished MY beer. After work (about 10pm) Sunday night, she was hungry and wanted to go to a local wine bar with a good menu. After seeing the beer list, I couldn't resist trying one of the local microbrews. Should have ordered a half pint but got a pint instead. Anyway, was only about 2/3 done with it when the check came, so she finished the beer for me. This is the first time she's seen the switch in action and was incredulous.

                    Need clarity of mind this month at work so will be staying at 90mg, unless the SEs return with a vengeance again, in which case I will be going back down to 75.
                    In the middle of my life's journey, I found myself in a dark wood, as I had lost the straight path. It is a difficult thing to speak about, how wild, harsh and impenetrable that wood is. Just thinking about it recreates the fear. It is scarcely less bitter than death, but in order to tell of the good that I found there, I must tell of the other things I saw there. --Dante, paraphrased

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                      #11
                      May be close to the switch

                      Mostly a thick, impenetrable mind-fog that makes it impossible to focus on anything, mild dizziness/lightheadedness, agitation and irritability. I took the head off a coworker Sunday who's usually just mildly irritating. I also had that weird breathing thing last week you mentioned on your thread.
                      In the middle of my life's journey, I found myself in a dark wood, as I had lost the straight path. It is a difficult thing to speak about, how wild, harsh and impenetrable that wood is. Just thinking about it recreates the fear. It is scarcely less bitter than death, but in order to tell of the good that I found there, I must tell of the other things I saw there. --Dante, paraphrased

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                        #12
                        May be close to the switch

                        It should all go away.

                        It sucks more if you have sit-down job. It has a paradoxical effect, if you are active and on your feet it can keep you going; if you are sitting down and trying to focus on something, it can suck you in.
                        :nutso: I take pride in my humility :nutso:
                        :what?:
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                        Graph of My Drinking From July '09 to January '10

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                          #13
                          May be close to the switch

                          Alky- sounds like you're getting great results at a low dose! Awesome. Yep, I experienced all the SE's that you describe and thought they'd never go away, but they do. Now, I take one big daily dose of bac without any SE's. It'll get better. Keep on!

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                            #14
                            May be close to the switch

                            Thanks SBL, side effects are pretty much gone except for mild sleepiness/mellowness, and that's not necessarily bad. I will stay at 90mg for the time being since I'm not having any problems staying AF and I can't afford the fogginess that might be brought on at a higher dose, at least for now.

                            One question I did have, though, has anyone had any issues with a "tingling" throat? It's most pronounced after my nighttime dose and I wake up coughing. Hydration is not the issue since I usually drink a big mug of hot tea before I go to bed. Since I am taking liquid bac, though, this may be comparing apples and oranges to most of you. Or, I could just be getting a sore throat
                            In the middle of my life's journey, I found myself in a dark wood, as I had lost the straight path. It is a difficult thing to speak about, how wild, harsh and impenetrable that wood is. Just thinking about it recreates the fear. It is scarcely less bitter than death, but in order to tell of the good that I found there, I must tell of the other things I saw there. --Dante, paraphrased

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                              #15
                              May be close to the switch

                              Post-nasal drip?

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