Nine months on Baclofen. SE worsening

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Nine months on Baclofen. SE worsening

terryk;1662593 wrote: Oh, Ne I'm very sorry to hear about Goose. I'm sure that she had a great life and was lucky to have you and Ed. -tk

Thanks, tk. I think she had a pretty rockin' life. Well travelled and with a refined pallet was our Goose. She was a darling of the neighborhood and hadn't been bothered with a leash or a fence in years. Even the postman developed a distant fondness for her.
If we were in a joking mood, we would surmise that she gave up the ghost because she knew there was a puppy in her near future and wouldn't share the limelight.

Sorry about my derail, Sam.

[Samandkatharine]

Nine months on Baclofen. SE worsening

Ne/Neva Eva;1662551 wrote: Here's an afterthought:

I am exhausted. Completely wiped out, even though I had a very active weekend, had a lot of good outdoor family fun, and got plenty of sleep. In fact, last night was the first time in weeks I wasn't awoken by our sick dog in the middle of the night. Because we buried her yesterday. I cannot describe the depth of sorrow. Those of you who've been through it know. But it's not exactly "stress", is it? What we're experiencing emotionally is definitely playing itself out physically. We both feel like we haven't slept at all. Maybe that's affecting you, too? (Not about my dog, obviously. God knows, everyone would be mourning my dog, if they'd met her. But that's not my point!)

xo

I'm so sorry Ne :l. My 14 yo dog snores next to me every night. Losing a pet is just terrible.

Yes, I do feel like I've never had a sound nights sleep. Not since I was 15. What a great thought. Sad, really. Too much time worrying, being enslaved to my next drink ect. Now I just worry.
Time to get a good therapist I guess.

Hugs , and I'm so sorry about your dog. Take time to grieve.

Sam

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Nine months on Baclofen. SE worsening

Thanks, Sam.

I don't think a therapist is a necessity, for the record. I'm really glad I've got one, but the benefit is that she's a sounding board with an impartial perspective and my best interests at heart. One that I trust, always respect and I even like most of the time. And most of the time, I'm not sure there is a benefit to talk therapy. But I keep going (though not regularly anymore) just in case there is! :H

[skullbabyland]

Nine months on Baclofen. SE worsening

Sam, just thought I'd jump in here and say that in my experience, too, anxiety (sometimes intense, sometimes general) does seem to fluxuate, coming and going, in my sober life. It seems to come in waves- a week or two it's heavy and intense, then goes away for a while, then stays around in a more moderate or general way, then back heavy for a few weeks, etc. Sometimes I fixate on a certain person or encounter for a while, replaying shame, fear, embarassment, anger, etc. and have a hard time letting go of it.

I dont' think in my case it's bac SE's but it's actually just dealing with uderlying issues, life, etc. I just never dealt with any of it before, just drowned it in booze instead. Nowadays I have to actually deal with life, anxieties, fears etc. and it can be challenging (and exhausting).

Is your experience similar to mine, or does it feel different?

[StuckinLA]

Nine months on Baclofen. SE worsening

skullbabyland;1662955 wrote: Sam, just thought I'd jump in here and say that in my experience, too, anxiety (sometimes intense, sometimes general) does seem to fluxuate, coming and going, in my sober life. It seems to come in waves- a week or two it's heavy and intense, then goes away for a while, then stays around in a more moderate or general way, then back heavy for a few weeks, etc. Sometimes I fixate on a certain person or encounter for a while, replaying shame, fear, embarassment, anger, etc. and have a hard time letting go of it.

I dont' think in my case it's bac SE's but it's actually just dealing with uderlying issues, life, etc. I just never dealt with any of it before, just drowned it in booze instead. Nowadays I have to actually deal with life, anxieties, fears etc. and it can be challenging (and exhausting).

Is your experience similar to mine, or does it feel different?

Sorry to jump in without reading all the way back to the original situation, Sam, but I do want to echo Skull here.

I'm no longer on bac, and abstinent almost 2 1/2 months now for the second long-ish period of abstinence over the last couple years. Anyway, anxiety comes and goes - for no reason it seems like. Not just stress, but the waves of OHF**K I'M DYING RIGHT NOW and vertigo and whatever. It happened last time I was abstinent, well past 3 or 4 months it was still touch and go, and it's coming and going again now.

Point is: being consistent with bac can probably only help, and it may not be the bac at all. Sh*t gets weird when alcohol is reduced or eliminated, and stays weird for a while. At least for me.

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Nine months on Baclofen. SE worsening

There is one more option. I shudder to think of it. Maybe it's just...life? Normal-ish?

Congrats, Stuck. Amazing.

[Samandkatharine]

Nine months on Baclofen. SE worsening

StuckinLA;1663013 wrote: Sorry to jump in without reading all the way back to the original situation, Sam, but I do want to echo Skull here.

I'm no longer on bac, and abstinent almost 2 1/2 months now for the second long-ish period of abstinence over the last couple years. Anyway, anxiety comes and goes - for no reason it seems like. Not just stress, but the waves of OHF**K I'M DYING RIGHT NOW and vertigo and whatever. It happened last time I was abstinent, well past 3 or 4 months it was still touch and go, and it's coming and going again now.

Point is: being consistent with bac can probably only help, and it may not be the bac at all. Sh*t gets weird when alcohol is reduced or eliminated, and stays weird for a while. At least for me.

:goodjob: Stuck!

Both you and Skull nailed it. Shit happens, and life is weird now.
I found an addictions doctor that I hope can help with the anxiety, and be my go to for a baclofen rx once my liquid is gone. Stress I can handle. Panic attacks I need help with.

Sam

[StuckinLA]

Nine months on Baclofen. SE worsening

Samandkatharine;1663373 wrote: Stress I can handle. Panic attacks I need help with.

Sam

EXACTLY. :l:l:l

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Nine months on Baclofen. SE worsening

eek. I shouldn't have been so cavalier. Stress, yes. Panic, no. Sorry!