Clinical was fun. (Thanks for the thoughts. I'm sure they helped!) At one point I was watching the heart monitors and got very excited because I thought one of my patients was having very erratic heart beats, (great for me, not so much for him!) and it turned out to be a loose lead. Lots of stupid mistakes like that, and somehow I'm fine with it all. (I'd bring bribes, Stuck, but I like to get all up in everyone's business. Otherwise it's just too boring. Give me the grunt work, but let me poke some people with sharp things, too!)
A couple of things have me reenergized about school and nursing, but I think the primary one is being able to go to UVA. Y'all, that would be amazing. I've got to step up my game a little to make sure that happens, and so it's a good goal on lots of levels.
SO AMAZING about the car, Lis. Driving=Freedom, no doubt. There was a guy around here years ago, Lowcountryman, from Holland, who once suggested we should get on our bikes (and stop eating Whoppers) rather than relying on cars for everything. The fact that he couldn't imagine the limitations of not having a car, and I (we) can't imagine being able to live without one, was pretty funny. It's not like being in LA, either. When Ed went through it all, he also commuted via several buses for several hours everyday. Ugh. Our lives changed dramatically the day he got his license back. It was as much the mental part of it as it was the physical, too. I'm so, so, so happy for you. So can you drive now? Or you have to wait until this test at the end of December?
Re meds: Have you tried the more traditional meds, Stuck? I swear, I think this place has done almost as much harm as good when it comes to medications. There is so much feckin' misinformation around here. I'm so grateful that I decided to learn about this stuff in a classroom, because I was really mislead by my own internet searches and the stuff I read here. (Honestly, it's one of the reasons I have such a hard time with the things that the beaver-like-animal posts. He's just wrong about so much crap, and smart enough to make it sound like he knows what he's talking about. SSRIs are not evil. Anti-anxiety meds are not all addictive and horrible for you. Withdrawals don't need to exist. It is worth listening to the actual doctor, and letting them tell us what they think, given the fact that they actually spent years and years in school for this stuff. I'm not excusing the pathetic nature of mental health care, or being apologetic for the abysmal treatment alcoholics get at the hands of some (many) professionals. I am suggesting that what we think we know, based on random stuff from internet searches, might not be accurate. (Please see the top two threads about medications on this very forum. Puhlease. So much malarkey.)
Anyway, I know this is pissing you off, but I'm going to write it and post it anyway. It's hard to see people suffering from untreated anxiety and depression, and looking for a way out, without trying the things that are most readily available and easiest to try. (Beta blockers, for instance. Not a bad choice. Just sayin' my friend.) All this goes for you, too, Bk. No reason not to try something, you know? The 1% or 5% (or even 10%) of people who share their horror stories might be valid, but don't represent the vast majority. (Unlike with baclofen, in which the vast majority have some pretty difficult side effects, whether it's the titration or the associated anxiety or the pill itself. Who knows? Lis is an exception, and should be noted for what she is doing [and not doing] in order to have such a positive experience. Nice job, again, Lis.)
Look, there might not be an easy answer or a quick fix. But there might be, and you can't know until you try.
I'll lay off the discussion for another several months. Just had to say my piece/peace.
On that happy note, I'm going to go find the rascal husky and see what kind of trouble she's getting into before we go on a loooong walk in the cold, dark morning. I figure if you can actually leave your house when it's below freezing, I can get some exercise when it's above. We'll see. I may wimp out.
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