22 years old now. Rewind 3-4 years and you'll find me in my first year of university. Already a heavy drinker at this stage but no more than my peers - still predominantly social and without problems.
Second year of university - different story. I experimented with a plethora of narcotics in addition to the copious amounts of booze, and towards the end of 2nd year, I came down with MAJOR OCD and anxiety/depression.
I get put on various AD's, which sort of help me through to graduation, but my alcohol use changes - demonstrating signs of abuse and dependence - convinced that SSRI may have had a hand in this.
Graduated and got a decent job. Started to take Naltrexone and follow TSM. I did this for 6 months, and I saw some improvements, but noticed that my hangovers were filled with anxiety and depression.
I decided to revamp my lifestyle, and 101 days ago, I gave up drinking, smoking, anti depressants and all things fun.
Yippee. Now here is the rub. This was never going to be a life long thing - I'm 22, and many people will say that it's a wonderful time to get sober; perhaps so, but I am struggling. Since quitting all of the above, I haven't really improved. I've started to eat compulsively at the weekend, and diet in the week to compensate. I gamble more than I should, and spend money that I don't have. I have begged for cognitive behavioural therapy, and I have been put on a 12 week waiting list. (Gotta love the NHS - have as many SSRIs as you like, but actual treatment?!)
I am really intrigued by balcofen. I originally set out to do 100 sober days, which I have accomplished, and I will continue this for a while until my naltrexone comes in a few weeks.
The main reason for my posting is that in my abstinence, I have changed nothing but the vice I use. My two year SSRI treatment has changed nothing, and the underlying anxiety that drives my compulsive behaviour is still there.
Can balcofen really address this? I've read that it can, and I am willing to try.
Questions - do you have to take it for the rest of your life?
Does it exacerbate depression?
Any input would be hugely appreciated as I am fresh out of ideas. I have tried everything, but now I am fed up of this self perpetuating inescapable anxiety-compulsion whirlpool.
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