I just came back to update that I moderated tonight and it went really really well. The first time I moderated (last Saturday), I had two beers and honestly didn't really enjoy them (maybe I was just nervous about drinking at all after going on the meds). Tonight, I had three glasses of wine (over about four hours) and really enjoyed it. I did not get buzzed at all, but I enjoyed the taste and it did still make me feel relaxed. I was sharing the wine w/a friend who came over for dinner. Could've opened another bottle (had another one chilled just in case), but felt satisfied w/the one bottle we shared. Other than last Sat and this Sat, though, I have been totally AF in between. I had one bad craving last Tuesday at 4pm, but took an extra 1000 mg of l-glut and that helped. Today, I also had a bad craving around 4pm, but didn't bother w/the extra l-glut since I had already planned that I would be having wine tonight w/my friend. I can't even begin to explain how great it feels to be able to make a plan and stick w/it. Seems like my worst nights often started w/the best of intentions. And, that is an awful feeling to not be able to trust yourself.
Anyway, I hope the Naltrexone keeps working for me. So far, so good. I hope one day I can mod without any meds, but for now, I feel like I really need the boost from the meds to help get me back in control.
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