Anyone else washed down 80mg of baclofen w/ liquour?

[Eber]

Was doing very well for quite a while, going up on dose and hoping to reach indifference, which would be so nice..

But I'm at 240 a day and I'm still not there.. Had a few months of being in good shape, but I have relapsed hard a few times, once landing me in the ER with a BAC of close to .3, hours after last drink.

Scary shit.

And here I am maintaining the appearance of normal while still downing basically a pint of vodka a night.. I can go a few days without, being tested by my doc, but still fucking cheat on it because I know length of time for etg test. But I'm mad shaky if I've gone on a bender and it's the most horrible feeling to try to get through that during the work week.

I feel like this can work, and I know things would be worse if I weren't doing what I am, but I'm a little worried at this point.

I was hoping I'd just not care about drinking at some point...

I know I need some sober time and that'd reset my mind, but it's hard to get there when the salve is so accessible.

I've been neglecting excercise, good diet, all the other things that should help, and I plan to refocus on those things.

Just wondering if I'm alone in having trouble hitting switch, which I so much want to do, and if there are any other experiences that might be informative.

Thanks!

-E

[Eloise]

Eber- I cannot say I have experienced what you are going through, but you deserve a reply to your post.
I really do not know what to say besides it sounds like you are going through sheer hell just now. I think it is time to get honest with yourself & your doctor and ask for some real help.
Maybe you won't ever reach indifference towards alcohol, then what? Does that mean alcohol wins?
You have to take to control Eber, it is your life and you are worth the effort.

Drinking all that you are I just don't think it is safe to try and quit on your own.
I have read that lots of people have trouble hitting the switch, but I honestly think you need a new plan. One that you can live will and slowly heal.
Take it easy today Eber!

[Alky]

Eber, what you are doing has the potential to be dangerous. I was also taking high doses of baclofen and drinking alcoholically at the same time. I had never been a falling drunk until I did this. I wouldn't remember it - I would just wake up sore, with bruises and broken glasses. I've also ended up in the ER as well while drinking and taking HDB.

One drug (baclofen) was not the answer for me. I finally found a good addiction psychiatrist who put me on a cocktail of gabapentin (mood stabilization/anxiety/craving), clonidine (ADD/anxiety), baclofen (craving) and as needed, naltrexone (craving), Vistaril (panic attacks) and Ativan (debilitating panic attacks). I am still working on the psychological component of drinking, but I can honestly say the biological drive to drink is no longer there (I have about 120 days sober, but unfortunately there not all consecutive). I guess what I am trying to say is that baclofen alone may not be the answer for you, as it wasn't for me. Perhaps you might want to talk to your doctor about titrating your baclofen dosage down and supplementing the bac with other medications. While others may disagree, I do not think the answer is for you to keep going up and up and up and up.

[Eloise]

Thank you for your post Alky and demonstrating, by sharing your experience, that there is a way out.
What you are going through is scary Eber, please take it all seriously and keep reaching for help until you do get the assistance you need to solve this problem. There is no one easy solution unfortunately or alcohol wouldnt be such a big problem for so many people. You are not alone in this struggle. There is more support and empathy out there for you than you would expect.

[Lostinspace]

Hi Eber. I don't have any great words of advice, since I'm in a similar boat myself at the moment, but I just wanted to say I'm sorry for what you're going through. I know how tough it is, when you think everything is going along smoothly with the titration, only to start to backslide again. It's really disheartening. I also did well for a couple months after hitting 160 mg, but began drinking again pretty much daily. I'm going up in dose and am attempting to do an AF November to see if I can accelerate the pace of reaching indifference.

Have you been getting any craving relief at all? I get the impression that you have, since you said you'd be worse off if you weren't doing this. I know that people often do have to go above 240 mg to reach true indifference, so it wouldn't be all that unusual for you to have not reached it yet. Getting some AF time would be helpful, however you can manage to do it, especially since it could give you the energy and motivation to get back into exercise, healthy eating, and other things that can be so helpful. I know that some people have added Antabuse to the mix with good success, just to force the issue and ensure that they'll get some AF time.

Hang in there, and keep us posted on how you're doing :hug:

[terryk]

Hi Eber, to answer your question - yes, I've been there - in a binge and (titrating too fast) on hdb, winding up in the ER with a .25 BAC - I'm really sorry that you are having such a difficult time. You are not alone.

Titrating to find indifference with baclofen is a tough mental game even with the supervision of a doctor - the anxiety, second guessing, paranoia, and tricks that your mind can play on you when you are self-prescribing can make it just about impossible to press on - I resolved to quit and taper off while I was laid up in the hospital for a week. Looking back, I think the only reason I continued was because (while in the hospital) the doctors cut my baclofen dose from 150 (actually 235+ for a bit) to 80mg/day overnight and I began to go into withdrawal after a few days. I had to have my girlfriend smuggle in baclofen from my personal stash to titrate back up to my previous dose. When I finally went home, and things leveled out, I (mostly) stayed sober, and continued up for 3-4 months. I too was getting distraught in the upper 200's wondering if I would ever find indifference - it caught me completely by surprise when I hit it at 280. Unfortunately, as I'm sure you know, everyone is different and there are no guarantees that this will work for you.

I don't give advice on how to take baclofen (except how to titrate down safely and comfortably), and I'm not sharing this story to encourage you to continue taking it. I think that it's best that people use the guidance of a qualified healthcare professional when using medications for addictions (and I'm not one of them). That said, qualified, informed doctors are often hard to find (outside of mainland Europe) in a time when the search for medications to treat addiction is still in its infancy - desperate times may call for desperate measures and everyone has the right to educate themselves and make their own decisions concerning their bodies and their healthcare.

Whether you go up or down is entirely up to you, and there will be folks here to lend you support in anyway they can either way.

-tk

There's some info in here on titrating down safely and comfortably:

https://www.mywayout.org/community/showthread.php?83672-What-to-do-if-you-are-running-low-on-%28or-out-of%29-baclofen&p=83672&viewfull=1#post83672

And also evidence that baclofen doses higher than 300mg/day may be necessary (but are efficacious and safe) to treat alcoholism in some cases:

https://www.mywayout.org/community/showthread.php?90600-The-use-of-very-high-doses-of-baclofen-for-the-treatment-of-alcohol-dependence&p=1568709&viewfull=1#post1568709

[Ne/Neva Eva]

I have been there, too. Though I didn't end up in the ER as a direct result of taking too much baclofen and drinking, thank goodness.

When I started titrating up, I made educated guesses as to how much I would have to take, and set limits as to what I was willing to do to get sober. The first was "no more than 80 mg". That, in hindsight, is laughable.

Like Terryk, I can't make the decision for you. I can tell you that I'm pretty sure my drinking didn't start to be affected until I got over 260 mg. That when I started drinking less, the side effects got better. And that I stopped at 320 mg, when I found that I didn't want to drink anything, for any reason.

The only reason I didn't quit was because I had too much invested and it would have taken too long to titrate down safely. Plus, I started to get glimpses that it was working.

With hindsight I think that if I had been more consistent with my dosing schedule, and if I had been able to stop drinking sooner, and patient enough to let the process work, I wouldn't have had to take quite so much baclofen. But who knows, really?

I also concur with everything else that Terryk said, of course. He's often wise, and definitely smart.

I hope you don't beat yourself up too much for all of the things you think you're not doing. What you are doing is hard. Give yourself some credit, and a break. You'll find it's all much easier to do if you can stop berating yourself.

Hang in there,

[Eber]

Thanks for the words of wisdom, everyone. I think I'm going to keep on my current path for now.. My doc says I'm close to the max he's ever prescribed for bac but I have some extra, may go up on my own.. I'd like for anything to be out of this mess..

Drank today to try to taper off, but turned out to be normal quantity over course of the day... I'm just hoping I can get through breakfast meeting at work tmrw without shakiness being too evident. When I'm worried about it it always manifests itself in exaggerated form..

Maybe 240 just isn't enough.. Clearly I'm super tolerant right now..

[neophyte]

took 300mg for me, around that dose 240mg, I still had cravings.

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Hi, Eber.
I don't know if you can relate, but I was 41 when I started taking baclofen, and I'd never really been sober for any length of time before. (Stints in rehab don't count, I suppose!) I was scared about taking more baclofen, my anxiety was through the roof, but underlying all of it were two things: I was terrified that it wouldn't work and really worried that it would.

When I was titrating up, I woke up one morning with the realization that at some point baclofen and sobriety became a mind game. What I mean is that I felt like I was inhibiting my progress with my thoughts. The idea of getting sober was terrifying on a couple of levels! I wasn't sure what I was going to do with my time, or my emotions, or my life without booze. It was inconceivable to me at the time that people could actually stop drinking willingly just because of a medication. But that's what happened.

I'm glad that you are trying to cut back. Tapering is really hard, especially if you're experiencing a lot of anxiety and discomfort. It definitely doesn't help that your recent experience was so horrific.

I don't know if you've got time or the inclination, but take a look at Terryk's threads. They're illuminating and inspiring.

I'm glad you posted.

[spiritwolf333]

Hi Eber, to answer your question - yes, I've been there - in a binge and (titrating too fast) on hdb, winding up in the ER with a .25 BAC - I'm really sorry that you are having such a difficult time. You are not alone.

Titrating to find indifference with baclofen is a tough mental game even with the supervision of a doctor - the anxiety, second guessing, paranoia, and tricks that your mind can play on you when you are self-prescribing can make it just about impossible to press on - I resolved to quit and taper off while I was laid up in the hospital for a week. Looking back, I think the only reason I continued was because (while in the hospital) the doctors cut my baclofen dose from 150 (actually 235+ for a bit) to 80mg/day overnight and I began to go into withdrawal after a few days. I had to have my girlfriend smuggle in baclofen from my personal stash to titrate back up to my previous dose. When I finally went home, and things leveled out, I (mostly) stayed sober, and continued up for 3-4 months. I too was getting distraught in the upper 200's wondering if I would ever find indifference - it caught me completely by surprise when I hit it at 280. Unfortunately, as I'm sure you know, everyone is different and there are no guarantees that this will work for you.

I don't give advice on how to take baclofen (except how to titrate down safely and comfortably), and I'm not sharing this story to encourage you to continue taking it. I think that it's best that people use the guidance of a qualified healthcare professional when using medications for addictions (and I'm not one of them). That said, qualified, informed doctors are often hard to find (outside of mainland Europe) in a time when the search for medications to treat addiction is still in its infancy - desperate times may call for desperate measures and everyone has the right to educate themselves and make their own decisions concerning their bodies and their healthcare.

Whether you go up or down is entirely up to you, and there will be folks here to lend you support in anyway they can either way.

-tk

There's some info in here on titrating down safely and comfortably:

https://www.mywayout.org/community/showthread.php?83672-What-to-do-if-you-are-running-low-on-%28or-out-of%29-baclofen&p=83672&viewfull=1#post83672

And also evidence that baclofen doses higher than 300mg/day may be necessary (but are efficacious and safe) to treat alcoholism in some cases:

https://www.mywayout.org/community/sh...=1#post1568709

Again, another helpful post from TK.

[bleep]

Shit position Eber.

If you are worried specifically about taking so much baclofen, I do know of several people, myself included, who have taken significantly higher than 300 and been fine. I found relief somewhere above 300 but was then able to reduce later.

Best of luck