[MENTION=24679]Mulburry[/MENTION] I have enjoyed reading your posts too. It seems we are the only two people posting, I check back regularly to see if anyone has commented on my thread and consistently see nothing. Your posts are the only deviation from mine and always have a look.
I think Gabapentin works on a different GABA receptor, I do recall people doing it years ago on here. Traditional approaches such as 12 step fellowships have never been a good fit for me and many I suspect. I used to be a part of them and was a willing advocate until my best friend killed himself at 8 years sober. I had been close to 3 other suicides in the 6 months prior, it caused me to start asking questions about the program and I had found and read Dr. Ameisen's book around the same time beginning my first journey on Baclofen. I found it interesting you felt stoned for lack of a better term on Gabapentin.
Another funny little story.
I ran into an AA member a few weeks ago, who I am still friendly with. There are a few I still chat with but many would not give me the time of day these days. When I turned my back on the fellowship a campaign of ostracising me took place, people were told to stay away from me as I would drag them back into active alcoholism, I only know this as certain people I was close to at the time were telling me. Anyway I came across this guy and he had a new girlfriend who I can only assume was a newcomer to the fellowship, he has now been sober for many years and is heavily indoctrinated. He says with a hyperbolic arrogance found amongst older sober members "there is only one way to stay sober." I suspect he said this for several reasons, one being to impress his new girlfriend. AA openly mocks medical approaches where I live. She looked proud at her choice in men and her journey into what she thought was the only way to remain sober. My response was to remind him AA was not the only way, there were other ways which AA would never promote as it does not fit their narrative. He knew exactly what I meant yet the arrogance of the older sober members is a fragile house of cards that requires strict adherence to cultural norms, especially when beginning to indoctrinate new members. They must be seen as something to aspire to, they love telling people how long they have been sober, it is a badge of honor worn very proudly yet can be sinister in its intent. He knows Baclofen has worked for me before and couldn't get out of my immediate vicinity quick enough.
I'm sure when I stopped taking Baclofen a few years ago, they would have relished that I was back drinking again, this is how sick a lot of older sober members still are. What they don't know is I made a conscious decision to stop taking Baclofen as I had been through some terrible changes in my life and had decided in the midst of a deep depression to try to drink myself to death, I know it sounds silly but I was determined to follow through. Alas drinking oneself to death is much harder than one would think. I ran into another old friend from AA after I had been in hospital recently in a supermarket, she asked about it and before I could begin to explain she implied it must have something to do with my alcohol beaten liver. It was not, and I couldn't help myself. I smiled and told her I thought it was amusing an older sober member of AA would immediately assume my health issues were directly related to alcoholism, she is a good woman but wow did she backpedal and try to get away from me as fast as she could. It is true I could have health issues from a hard life of drinking, I have certainly done a lot of it. The truth though is my kidneys, liver and pancreas are all functioning normally, it is a bit of a miracle but it is what it is. Once again the default arrogance of the older sober members bubbles through to reveal itself, even whilst proclaiming gratitude, serenity and an open mind. I know they believe their lives depend on it but this is just another aspect of the indoctrination process of 12 step fellowships. The similarities to a cult are very interesting, even if they have very well worn reasonings as to why they are not a cult.
I am now on 290mg a day and have only drank 7 beers over the last couple of nights with most of the 7th being tipped down the sink, I suspect I will be going higher but with the changes I am seeing it won't be too much longer before I can say I have hit the switch and start thinking about finding a maintenance dose.
Cheers Steve.
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