Hi Echome
It seems you have sunk very low but not lower than others on this website. You are not alone. Alcoholism is such a baffling problem. One would think it would be easy to stop something so negative and that makes you feel so guilty. but instead, the reverse seems to hold true. it's back for more.
I hope you find some solace on this website, and I think the person who advised you to drink a lot of water and take care of yourself, not to drink, is right. you will feel better after that.
take care!
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