Flip was right I cannot put myself down and think Iam a looser. This is part of the addiction. It only prevents you from healing and sends you back to hell. Today I feel that I am a good person who has done horrible and very bad things to myself and family. If you notice I changed my mood to Hopeful.
OK first full day in IOP. Where do I start? You know the last week but how did I get here? At five years of age I started drinking wine. At 10 I was a blackout drunk. Meth was the next biggy man I sure loved that stuff. Have not used in over a decade very bad stuff. First wife left me i.e. kicked me out. Same house too go figure? Never went to rehab quit meth cold turkey. Never learned how to live AF. What happens is you take all your bad habits with you to the next relationship. If I only knew.
I will be in IOP for the next 14 monthes. 3 times per week plus 3 AA meetings per week. Then 1 time per week pluse 3 AA. Plus anger manegament classes Plus child development classes I think. Sounds like a long year but really It will go very fast.
I talked to my wife tonight. It is sooooo nice to here her voice. I wish you could hear her it is so beutifull. I could her my little girl in the background. I sure wish I could talk to her. I call her Boo Boo. You have to say it fast. It is late so much to say. Keep praying for my family I think It is working. ECHOME.
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