It is Tuesday evening and I sit here with tears streaming down my face because I don't know how I allowed myself to end up like this. I'm not in the habit of feeling sorry for myself but tonight I'm feeling such an overwhelming sadness. Will I ever beat this thing. I have the supplements, the book, the cds, and I ordered the topamax over a week ago but it hasn't come yet. I see my doctor tomorrow night and I plan on finally being honest with him. Every day I swear it will be my last day and it never is. I read a lovely post by irishlady about this disease being like swimming in a pool. The analogy was perfect and it made so much sense but it also said some of the people turn away and never go back in the pool and I can't help but wonder if I am one of those people.
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Tootsie,
I am new here myself but have felt the way you feel many times. I finally took the plunge in the pool ( I love the analogy also) and even though I am barely off the steps I AM DETERMINED to keep trying. Sept. 1 was my "official" start date and I have not had as many AF days as I would like, and I wish every day I had already beat this monster, but I haven't - yet. We just have to keep on trying.. why do we let ourselves get this way? - I am not sure there is an answer, if there was, we probably would not do it.
Don't turn away.. I didn't.. I haven't made it very far, but I did not turn away.. and neither will you.
Leebo"I am whole, perfect, strong, powerful, loving, harmonious, happy, and prosperous. I am healthy and wise and open to an even greater good. I approve of myself."
Fall seven times, stand up eight. -Japanese proverb -
Ready to stop
Thank you, Leebo.Comment
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Tootsie,Leebo;213493 wrote: Tootsie,
Don't turn away.. I didn't.. I haven't made it very far, but I did not turn away.. and neither will you.
Leebo
Lovely post by Leebo :l
Just keep trying. I too have had a terrible day and am very sad and cannot sleep (Alcohol Free though) so I got up out of bed after a few hours and come to check in here. Keep coming back no matter how you are feeling. This community will give you strength to go on trying.
Take care :l
It'll be better in the morning.
B
BComment
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phoenix74, I will keep coming back but I feel so sad right now. I think I am going on a huge crying jag but I will talk with my doctor tomorrow. I will post tomorrow night after I see my doctor. Thank you so much for your support. It will be better in the morning!!Comment
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Tootsie: Give yourself a great big pat on your back for taking the initiative to come to this site, post, order supplements and for making a doctor appointment. Once you admit you have a problem, it becomes a little easier to do something about it. You are off to a good start. Let us know how you make out at the docs. - ReenieSeptember 23, 2011Comment
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Reenie, I will let you know how I make out tomorrow. Thank you.Comment
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:welcome: tootsie and Leebo!
Just wanted to welcome you both and I know you will find the support you need here! I hope to see you guys around the boards!Comment
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Accountable to Me, I too want to be seen on the boards. Hopefully it will mean I am beating this. Thank you.Comment
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The only thing you can do tootsie, is try... and keep trying. None of us came to the board (or at least I believe none of us did) and instantly quit drinking. I lurked for quite sometime and then a month later I finally had enough strength, courage and support to give it my all.
This isn't an easy thing to do or else this website would be obsolete. Keep trying to find things that will help you along the way.... like supplements, reading material (MWO Book), CD's, medications; if needed. Posting/reading here, really helps. You won't feel alone here.Comment
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Never,never,never stop trying. I was a member for 4 months before I was able to put it all together and finally quit drinking. Today is day 74 AF. You,too, can do it. Keep thinking about quitting , and keep coming back and reading and posting. This program works...
DonComment
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Accountable and Chief, thanks so much. I won't quit trying. I only hope I am strong enough.
Congrats, chief on 74 days AF. I wish for that.Comment
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tootsie - you are strong enough. Keep telling yourself you are until you start believing it! Everyone is strong enough, it is a matter of finding out what will work for the individual and loads of positive self-talk!
Think about it like a baby learning how to walk. He gets up, he falls down.... he gets up again, he falls down again.... he gets up again, and he starts walking.........
you get what I am saying... baby steps...Comment
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Accountable, it's 5:00 am and I feel spent after my crying jag but will take baby steps. I took off from work today and plan on reading the MWO book and listening to the first cd. Two baby steps. Thanks.Comment
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Accoutable, if WTF stands for what I think it does, I like your mood stamp.Comment
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