Hi Max
I hope you are feeling a little better. It feels very natural but it is so crazy that when people have depression they treat it with alcohol for years on end. Alcohol abuse seems to set up the physical situation for more and worse depression.
I don't know about bipolar but some other members have posted on that in other threads if you want to look them up. For depression and anxiety, make sure you eat very well, take supplements including B vitamins and quality omega 3 fish oil. Get exercise. And when you get depressed try riding it out without alchohol. You may be amazed that the next day after an attack of depression, you feel ok if you don't do the self-medicating with alcohol. As for therapy, I think cognitive behavioral therapy is worth looking into. I would suggest someone who doesn't have rigid 12-step ideas about what alcholism is.
I don't think you want to self-destruct, judging by the fact that you posted here and asked for help.
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