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    #1

    rollercoaster of emotions



    Here I sit, feeling pretty darm positive...second day working on AF...posting away la dee dee...happy days when BAM!
    Anxiety...can't quite draw a deep breath....glancing at the clock thinking it wouldn't be TOO disgusting to drink now, it IS after 12pm after all.
    And so the internal battle begins...you know the one...the justification...I don't really NEED a beer, I just WANT a beer, and so this some how makes it ok...not quite so...alchie like...the lies I tell myself that have formed decades of drinking patterns and behaviour.
    Oh goodie, now I have moved on to feeling weepy, and sorry for myself. CRAP
    Striving to live life without ALCOHOL
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    #2
    rollercoaster of emotions

    I understand....
    Control the Mind

    Comment

      #3
      rollercoaster of emotions

      hi Rocky.thanks...if there was alcohol in the house I would be drinking it right now...so I guess I should be happy for that atleast.
      Striving to live life without ALCOHOL

      Comment

        #4
        rollercoaster of emotions

        Try to distract youself...get a new book...new movie..call someone...walk...run...sing...dance....icecream...
        Control the Mind

        Comment

          #5
          rollercoaster of emotions

          Keeta

          i could have wrote your post myself.... been there done that.

          Here's to you, hope you do well tonight. Let me know.

          K

          Comment

            #6
            rollercoaster of emotions

            Distraction is good...admitting it out loud (here) is also helping...I have never admitted a problem before...so maybe making it *real* will make it some how easier...and I have to say thank you...sincerely..for posting...this time I didn't go to the liqour store, and grab a 12 pack...a small hurdle..but a big difference from two days ago...the first beer would have already been gone.
            Striving to live life without ALCOHOL

            Comment

              #7
              rollercoaster of emotions

              Keeta - yup, keep busy.....drink water by the gallon....even a sweet tea/coffee! Chocolate.
              This will pass - very common in the first week...stick it out....it gets soooooooooooo much better then.

              (One 'tip' I heard was to clean the entire bathroom with bleach and a toothbrush'...! I never quite got that 'bad' but it was a 'good' idea to carry around that first week!)

              Good Luck
              FMS xx
              :heart: c: :heart:
              "Be patient and gentle with yourself - the magic is in you."

              Comment

                #8
                rollercoaster of emotions

                K....thank you for posting...one battle down...for now! Part of reading here is finding out I am really not as alone in my battle as I thought. Hopefully feeling supported and in turning supporting others, maybe, just maybe I can do this?????????????
                Striving to live life without ALCOHOL

                Comment

                  #9
                  rollercoaster of emotions

                  Finding My Self...wonderful name!....water....yes...am drinking my gazillionth glass today (mild exagerration, ha ha)...and busy...will keep the bathroom, toothbrush idea in mind...if I can get through a week, I hope it gets better...after so many years I haven't developed the coping tools for this...drinking is my coping tool...
                  Striving to live life without ALCOHOL

                  Comment

                    #10
                    rollercoaster of emotions

                    You will Keeta! Welcome....this is just the best place to achieve new coping mechanisms...

                    I've just posted on a daily thread about managing to 'obey' my inner knowledge today (at last!) and just slow down and replan what was going to turn into a disaster through weather, hormones and other bits....I;ve replanned for Saturday, the earth didn't disolve and, although I wouldn't have been pushed to bozze now (see!!!!!), I could well have felt 'not-coping-at-all-well' like! But I coped and re-found my balance. 8 months ago I would never have believed it.

                    So, keep going....it IS worth it. Daily it will improve. Trust me. Few ups anddowns to make it interesting but improve it will.

                    Love and luck!
                    FMS xx
                    (I used to be FInding My Feet but after I found them, I changed it to FM Self! Then I plan it to be FM Soul! One day! This place rocks....to have found my feet was HUGE!)
                    :heart: c: :heart:
                    "Be patient and gentle with yourself - the magic is in you."

                    Comment

                      #11
                      rollercoaster of emotions

                      Hi Keeta, yep I know the feeling well and will keep the stuff out of the house. If it is there it is all too easy. Get some distractions lined up, go to chat during the witching hours, read and drink tea. Tomorrow when we wake up feeling good, that's going to be addicting too!
                      The more we appreciate life, the more life appreciates and bestows us with more goodness.

                      Comment

                        #12
                        rollercoaster of emotions

                        Finding...8 months....wow...if I can make it 8 more hours it will be an accomplishment haha...but I will keep at it...try and roll with the emotions...learn from you and others...and try hard not to give in, or give up!

                        Suzanna...ahhh...to be addicted to not drinking...THAT would be so incredible...I wish it didn't seem like such an impossibility...keeping distracted, and busy...active...and coming here seem like great advice. I don't know what brought me to find this link (on a page not even related to drinking) but I have known for years and more so in this past year, that my drinking is becoming a HUGE problem...it is becoming a focus, not a side line problem....time to step up and fix myself...one day, crap...one afternoon at a time!
                        Striving to live life without ALCOHOL

                        Comment

                          #13
                          rollercoaster of emotions

                          Keeta....I just want to tell you you're doing a fine job and everything you are thinking and feeling is normal... You are going through withdrawl...it's an uneasy feeling, a mix of emotions.

                          If you haven't already done so, you have to make a plan. You have to make a committment to yourself to not drink. Think of it as a battle...a test of wills. One voice in your head, The Beast, is putting all kinds of thoughts and pictures into your mind, with the sole purpose being getting you to take that first drink. That's all The Beast wants you to do...just have 1 ...because he knows that once you have 1, then he's in control, and you'll have 20.
                          The other voice in your head is the real you. The you that wants to quit drinking. The you that knows right from wrong. The you that realizes if you don't stop this insanity something very bad is going to happen. The you that wants to take back control and stop living a life of deception and guilt. The you that wants to be you again.

                          So take this battle seriously. The hard part only lasts a few days. Think of it as having the flu...there's nothing you can do about it but take care of yourself and let it run it's course, and it will be over...
                          You have to want to win. Be stubborn about it. Promise yourself you will not drink...no matter what.....NO MATTER WHAT. Give yourself your word on it. I will not drink today.

                          It's all about attitude. Take it one day at a time. One hour at a time if you have to. Distract yourself. Go to the gym. Go running. Go for a walk.

                          Make sure there is no booze in your house. Don't go to stores that sell it for the first few days. Set yourself up for success, not failure. You have to be proactive and attack this thing...don't just sit around waiting to cave. Look for every opportunity to win.

                          Keep reading and posting...go on chat...there are always people here to help you if you need it. Don't be afraid to ask for help in chat. If there are people chatting or joking and you need to talk, just say so, and they will be there for you.

                          We've all gone through what you are right now. You're not alone...we can help..

                          Hope this helps.... You can do this.... If I can do it, so can you..

                          Don

                          Comment

                            #14
                            rollercoaster of emotions

                            Hey Keeta....Its a new year.....clean out the closets and drawers and give all your never used junk to Salvation army!
                            Hang in here.......
                            We know how that feels!
                            :l Nancy
                            "Be still and know that I am God"

                            Psalm 46:10

                            Comment

                              #15
                              rollercoaster of emotions

                              Boy do we know how it feels and it sucks. I wish everyone whose advice is "Just quit" could feel it just once. But it will end and you WILL feel amazing. You can do it.

                              Comment

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