Poured. Gack! how triggers and weakness work together. Siren songs.
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hit the bottle
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hit the bottle
Dang!!! ( southern term Bessie) another snit with hubby. No alcohol in the house. Look down the drain. Hummm.. I DO need tools. My brain is trained to turn to alcohol. Oh, feel a bit of stress? Let's have a drink or five. I think that half a bottle of chardonay is in the fridg. I will not go look. I will not do it. Craporama!! This is tough! Now that I think of it being there it friggin' screams my name. Hall monitor is not here.sigpic
Thoughts become things..... choose the good ones. ~TUT
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hit the bottle
Could not stand it. Went to look and guess what? Poured it out. So... don't have to worry about that any more. I wonder if it was a good one though. I didn't have any.sigpic
Thoughts become things..... choose the good ones. ~TUT
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hit the bottle
Greenie,
What you are talking about is exactly why I went with Antabuse. Once my anxiety triggers or nervousness triggers, I go "internal" and start looking for the first way out. In my case for 30+ years that has been drinking.
I finally got smart enough to realize that it was either Antabuse or long term rehab and a halfway house. The latter is not an option for me so I ended up doing the former.
Yes. Sometimes I think I am going to completely fall apart when my brain starts swimming and I start seeing those spots but I just know there is no way I can take a drink to alleviate it. Every time I have an episode like that and come out okay having figured out how to deal with it without alcohol, is one step closer to being a non-drinker.
Every once in a while when it has been a bad'un, I think back to Dolly Parton's line, "That which does not kill us makes us stronger." I hate chick flicks but I loved that one and I remember that line whenever I have a rough spot.
Hang in there, Greeneyes. Make every trigger you succeed getting through without alcohol be one more step in the direction you know you want to go.
Just like you, I am a "tenderly used" southern woman and that means we are some tough people. We have to be to deal with the southern gentlemen in our lives!!
Love,
CindiAF April 9, 2016
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hit the bottle
It's wierd. Yo just sort of twiddle your thumbs. Thinking "not drinking, not drinking, not drinking". And I KNOW better. I have a hundred thing to do. Healthy activities that I have advised others to do. The fixation is incredible.sigpic
Thoughts become things..... choose the good ones. ~TUT
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hit the bottle
Come on, Green......get mean...take control back...you are in charge....don't get weak now....you've almost got it for tonight.
Listen to me...you know you will not be happy with yourself if you drink......just stay home...force yourself. You are allowing The Beast to make taking a drink an option......stop it. It is not an option...you are being fooled.
What advice would you be giving someone else if the tables were turned?
Don
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