just need someone to listen

[twoxland]

well this isnt the way i wanted my first post to go, but anyway i've had a pretty bad day. I worked 3rd shift last nite and me and my co-workers went out and drank. I of couse got very drunk. i went outside to smoke and another co-worker of mine came out behinde me and he proceded to pick a fight with of me, i did nothing so i dont know why he done it...someone said he had been having a bad night and well i was the smallest person there so i guess he decided that i was the best one to pick a fight with, i jsut turned around and walked and as im walking away he yells f!@#ing pussy... but i just blew it off. so i dont know im thinking im just gonna quit my job now. but thats the least of my problems. I was walking home and i blacked out woke up and i was surounded by peramedics and firemen. turns out i had a cezsure. but since all of this i have been really depressed. I;m supost to be on meds for depression but i cant aford the meds so yea. i can normaly just shake it off and move on but somethings different today...i just don't know i have been sitting around today just crying uncontrolaby and just thinking why am i going through this. i have had depression since i was about 13 but since i started this new job i lost my insurence so i dont wana go to the doctor casue i cant afford it. i want to sleep so bad but just cant fall asleep but thats all i got now

[nancy]

just need someone to listen

Hi there

Can you tell us a bit more about yourself?

I know your situation sounds grim, but believe it or not others have been in similar or worse situations. So you are not alone.

How old are you? And what does your tagline mean, "banned" etc.?

Have you been here before?

Are u someone we know?

what time zone are you in?

[twoxland]

just need someone to listen

well im 23 y/o and im from minnesota, im not sure why it says im banned, i have never used this site b4 till now, no i doubt if u know me being i've never been on here b4

[ducky]

just need someone to listen

Two,

Just saw your post and sorry to hear you are feeling so poorly. Nancy is right, there are many here who have been in your situation.

Can you afford to download the book or get any of the supplements? If not, keep reading posts and posting. Others will be along with advice.

[southernbelle47]

just need someone to listen

:welcome:Twoxland

Don't know how you found us but would love to hear more of your story.
Go ahead and put it here so we can begin to help.
This is a good place to be totally honest....it's the only way to get better.

Nancy

[LVT25]

just need someone to listen

Two--hopefully you've gotten some sleep and are feeling a little better. Like the others said,

keep coming here to post and read. Drink lots of water and liquids. You also have to be

patient. ok?

[Thankful]

just need someone to listen

Twoxland ~ Glad you finally posted for some help. It says you joined in February.

It's time to turn all this sadness around. If you have been told by someone in the medical field that you need meds for depression maybe you can find a free clinic or someting like that in your area. Try calling a local hospital and see what they suggest.

In the meantime, can you get yourself some multivitamins and Omega 3-69 Fish oils? Maybe get some today? They are relatively cheap at any Walmart or drugstore. The vitamins and especially the fish oil will really help your mood. I used to think I suffered from depression for years, but come to find out it was the alcohol. And when I started the supplements, wow, big difference in my mood. Let today be the day you take an active part in getting yourself well. You deserve to be healthy and happy.

Please tell us more about yourself. We would love to hear more. We are here for you.

Love, Me
:l

[gelgit]

just need someone to listen

Hi 2x, I hope you're feeling a better. The same thing happened to my son "Life in the good ol USA without insurance" He waded through all the paperwork to get financial help for the ER bill. The good news is that it's unlikely that another seizure will happen if the drinking stops and that there probably will be no permanent damage, but you gotta stop. My son did...18 months now. The seizure scared the bejesus out of him. Get rest, get vitamins and stay here reading and postiing.

It's magic to be able to tell someone what's in your mind and heart and get really important feedback (and MWO doesn't cost $90 an hour) Hang in there. g.:h

[twoxland]

just need someone to listen

well heres a bit of a run down of my life so far... my dad was a otr truck driver so he wasnt around much at all my mom was a "stay at home mom" i droped out of high school @ 16 to go out on the road with my dad satyed out with him for about 6 months then we came home for new years eve, thats when i got the call jan. 1 2001 they had found my dad dead in a motel room, he had suffered a masive MI, so after that i went back to school and was really strugling with depression. So i left again and just went and got a G.E.D. and this was all before i ever took a drink. my drinking didnt stgart getting bad till i was 20 then i started drinking daily i'd wake up in the morning after a full day of drinking and just start it all over again. then i got commited to go to treatment. well that lasted about 12 hours after i got out i was back drinking again... so i decided to go back again, then my mom started getting sick from he MS so i left ama. and i have just decided not to try it again casue every treatment center in minnesota is "12 step based" and that just dosent work for me, i guerss it dose for some but just not for me but as for right now, in so nervious and i just dont know why im shaking sick to my stomach and my head fells like someone has a jack hammer to my it. i dont know if i should even go into worki tonite casue im so snappy right now, even the smallest thing sets me off and i dont wana go in and maker everyonje hate me. and i really dont wana telkl people at work what problems im having casue well yea. i realy hate the thought of quitting my job after only 3 weeks but i dont know if i can handel it the 3rd shift is just doing me in. And since i started this job my drinking has really picked up that and i still have yet to sleep so i dont know what to do anyway thank you for the replys and i will talk to u all later

[greeneyes]

just need someone to listen

Gosh, my heart goes out to you. I know what the shakes and night sweats and all that are like. Can you try and cut back a bit each day and make it until you have a couple days off? Drink as much water as you can. Baking soda and epsom salts are pretty cheap and if you do a hot bath soak of one cupe each for 20 minutes (longer is not better) it will help draw out the toxins. Hang in there! :l

[out]

just need someone to listen

Prayers...

or good thought or whatever you believe is sometimes the only thing to do, greeneyes had some good advice. I have found this place to be a good place to talk and be honest about your use without much judgement. There have been a lot of people who have found their peace with the stuff, whether that is staying off it, being moderate or reducing...even a small goal of reducing just a bit is helpful. take care.

[songbird]

just need someone to listen

My heart goes out to you...You have not found this place by accident. You will learn alot here and find out that everyones story is unique, different, the same sometimes, and always tragic and filled with sorrow.

I am fairly new and still going through the detox stage. I am alo a depressed person since childhood and on antidepressants which don't work with alochohol anyway.

When i told my doc i wanted to cut down/quit...he gave me the advice of cutting down a little every day. I didn't have to work for 3 days i was lucky i could feel yuk alone, but it might be a good idea for you...Again i am not a doctor...maybe you should gosee one you trust to make it more comfortable for you.

L-glut and Kudzu with the vitamins and minerals work very well for cravings.

It made me feel good to not feel so alone here...Welcome, and thanx for sharing your story:h

[magic]

just need someone to listen

Hi Two,

Welcome, I'll add mine to the others, I'm so very glad you have found us.

You have already gotten some awesome advice. I'll just add my two cents if you don't mind.

You don't say what caused your previous seizure. Withdrawal from alcohol can also cause seizures and since you have already had one you are at risk for another if you quit drinking cold turkey. I'll echo the advice to see if you can find a free clinic as medical help would be most benificial to you.

https://www.mywayout.org/community/f7...wal-13412.html

I think that most of us here were lost and forlorn at one time or another. Life can get better, it takes determination and hard work and you need support.

Keep posting and reading, you've found a good place.

magic xx

[gelgit]

just need someone to listen

Hi Two, how's it going? I've been thinking about what you wrote. It sounds like life is going way too fast and that you just have too much stuff on your plate. Besides the drinking, do you smoke: tobacco or pot, drink coffee, taking any "meds", what are you eating?? Emotionally and physically it seems like you're about to explode:bomb:
The most important person you need to listen to you is yourself. You've gotta find some help. Keep posting and asking questions about what folks think might be good for you to try. Remember that you are NOT alone.
Right now, just try some slow, deep breathing. Start with filling your belly with air and slowly move up thru all of your lungs, pause and them reverse expelling the air slowly. Do it again. Also, stretch every muscle in your face...make a silent scream, bug out your eyes and then relax. Do the face thing in private: other people will freak but you will feel much better:H What are the good things in your life: happy memories? More later, g.:h

[Jaded]

just need someone to listen

Two...I'm a nurse and have worked nights and found night shift makes everything worse...I did it for 2 yrs and my drinking got much, much worse...it makes it ok to drink in the morning because that's when you get off work and after waking it's ok because it's night time and everyone else is drinking so no one thinks bad of you but the worst part was the depression..working nights made it so much worse..My doc said night shift amplifies ever problem you have and he was right. I just couldn't do it any longer.
I hope you are feeling better today..I'm glad you are here.
Jade