I need help

[montbob]

I need help

gabby1go;334801 wrote: Montbob,

I worked in HR for years and have seen this situation over and over again. My best advice for everyone is NEVER, NEVER, NEVER drink more than one with co-workers.

I hate to say this, but I think you may never be able to recover from this. Your boss will never trust you again, no matter how much you say you are sorry. Unless you are an otherwise excellent employee and they really care about you, EAP may only be a means-to-an-end for them. Have you had any disciplinary write-ups, warnings, etc.? If they feel that your drinking is a problem and you are labeled a "drinker", "alcoholic", whatever, you will have that label for a long time and people will be watching your every move. This may be a good time to look for new employment.

Don't want to be the bearer of bad news, just wanted to be honest. Gabby.

Actually the drinking never came up with management,it was more about my attitude and actions and their loss of confidence in my ability to do my job.They act like they want me to be happy and think that I would be better as an agent,rather than a manager.I was an agent(insurance)for over 15 years and have been very succesful.They would like me to go back as an agent,although it would be in an independent all commission role.They said they would give me some time to transition and once I got my confidence back up maybe i could reaply.This is the way I'm leaning,because i really need to do some work on myself and try to find happiness and balance in my life.:thanks:

[hart]

I need help

(((Montbob))

DO the EAP. I have done it for several issues and I KNOW it is confidential. And really, do you think your boss doesn't realize you have a problem. It's just counseling, and you even get time off, at least in my work, to go during work. You don't have to state WHY, just that it is EAP related.

And good for you for being DAY 2 AF! :goodjob:

[gabby1go]

I need help

I think that is a great idea. It will give you the chance to do the work you want on yourself and since you were so successful at it for so long before, it may bring you confidence back up. Which, in turn, may help with your drinking. As someone said in an earlier post, "everything happens for a reason", and this may be sending you in a direction you need to go. Approach it with a great attitude, not a demotion but rather an opportunity. You will do great! I would also ask your supervisor and HR how they are going to portray this position change. You don't want your reputation damaged within the company. Let us know what happens. Gabby.

[4theboyz]

I need help

Montbob,

All of the above is sage advice on what you are facing. My own suggestion is to seek legal council of some sort as alcoholism in the workplace is a touchy subject legally and depending on how you slice your situation, you may have legal support to preserving your job if you so choose to pursue.
Best to you.
4tb

The Rehabilitation Act and ADA prohibit employers from firing disabled employees “solely because of” the employees’ disabilities.[15] In other words, employers may not discriminate against employees simply because they are alcoholics.[16
Ungaretti & Harris LLP | Publications Search | Balancing Alcoholics' Rights and Employer Liability Under Anti-Discrimination Laws

[music man]

I need help

Hi Montbob,

I just spent about 20 minutes crafting a detailed reply to your post and got logged out... losing everything I just typed!!! I need to now change my mood icon from Mellow to F%$#@ING PISSED OFF!

O.K. I'm fine now ;}.

So what I wanted to say is; It's day 2 AF for me as well (thus the lack of anger management skills

I can definitely relate to your situation.
I recently had conversation with the President of a big entertainment company while intoxicated... Brilliant career move on my part... Luckily it was a party environment, and I wasn't totally gone (yet), but definitely stupid of me.

In the past I have always tried to hide my drinking, and only have 1 or 2 in front of business associates (then going home and guzzling), but I have had a few slip ups like the one the other night, and who knows how much damage I have already caused my career... (I'll never know, because potential clients will just call someone else rather than me)

Anyway, I have decided to take control of my drinking, and this site offers a lot of great support. I have also been taking the supps, and starting to exercise which is helping a lot.

Hang in there things will get better.

-MM

[montbob]

I need help

Thanks man.I walked with the kids and dog last evening about 2 miles.It helped me sleep and i actually taught my dog to heel instead of choking himself to death.:welcome:

[Doggygirl]

I need help

montbob;335129 wrote: Thanks man.I walked with the kids and dog last evening about 2 miles.It helped me sleep and i actually taught my dog to heel instead of choking himself to death.:welcome:

HEY!! That doggy activity is FIRST RATE in my book! I'm finding that exercise is really helping me. Glad that walk helped you sleep! (It's Doggy Karma I tell you!!)

MUSIC MAN!!! I am so happy to see you. One of the original Booze Beast Bustin' inspirations. You better get your a$$ back in for 30 days just like me and everyone else who is determined to get this right eventually!

You too montbob.... (in the months abstinence section if you are interested!)

DG
********
Day 8 AF and closin' in on Double Digit Day

[Evie.Lou]

I need help

Keep on KEEPIN on .It feels to me that your time to really start on the road to recovery has come.Please join us and we will bet the BEAST together !!!!EVIE

[music man]

I need help

Montbob, You are a better dog trainer than me... I never got my dog to stop choking himself (then again he wasn't the brightest dog I have met

Speaking of dogs and such... Hi Doggygirl!!! Yes, I went MIA for a while, but now I'm back. It's great to see you here. I think I'll mosey on over to the 30 day group soon. Right now I am just taking it one day at a time.

MM

[jessie]

I need help

Hi everyone,
I am feeling desperate, will I ever beat this beast. Have been binging for 3 days - feeling suicidal this morning. Do'nt worry, I won't do it but you know the feeling. With my last bit of resolve I quickly drank half a Antabuse ( to scared to take more in case there is still some al in my system). In a couple of hours I'll take another half. How many can a person take. Can I take 2 today to make sure that I cannot drink for at least a couple of days?
Desperate Jessie

[music man]

I need help

Hi Jessie,

I don't know how much Antabuse you can take. Are there instructions on the bottle? Be very careful with any prescriptions. This will make you very sick if you have alcohol in your system.

Maybe you should start a new thread with this so the it more visible and someone with more understanding can give you advice...

As for the 3 day binge, I have certainly had my share of those. It's tough to break the cycle, but just try and focus on one day at a time. Make sure you are eating, and taking vitamins. The alcohol will drain a lot on nutrients out of your system, fill you up with empty calories.

Hang in there, you can break this cycle.

-MM

[Guest]

I need help

From what I understand you must not take Antabuse until the last drop of AL is out of your system - which can mean up to 7-10 days detox.

Please don't take any more and don't USE Antabuse to 'make' yourself stop drinking, it can go horribly wrong. Stop, then use the medication to put you off relapsing.

Take care and if you feel ill call for help.

[jessie]

I need help

Thanks MM and UKblonde,
It really helps being able to talk with someone.Well, I am going for AF June, starting today. I clocked up 13 AF days for May. I'll hold on to your hands.
X Jessie

[FloridaBoy]

I need help

montbob;334865 wrote: Actually the drinking never came up with management,it was more about my attitude and actions and their loss of confidence in my ability to do my job.They act like they want me to be happy and think that I would be better as an agent,rather than a manager.I was an agent(insurance)for over 15 years and have been very succesful.They would like me to go back as an agent,although it would be in an independent all commission role.They said they would give me some time to transition and once I got my confidence back up maybe i could reaply.This is the way I'm leaning,because i really need to do some work on myself and try to find happiness and balance in my life.:thanks:

Will you be replaced with another manager or are they eliminating the position from the
organization chart?

[savon19]

I need help

I worked as Benefits Coordinator

and EAP SHOULD BE ENTIRELY CONFIDENTIAL.

If I were you, I'd take advantage of that program. You can then tell your boss that you are getting help (he/she doesn't have to know for what reason!).

...That's IF you want to keep your job. If not, get fired for unemployment!!