hello again

[Amethyst26]

How does one get rid of that empty feeling when wine has been your friend everynight for years? I myself am divorced for 10 years...suffer from anxeity and depression and take meds for it. As night falls I feel very lonely....after a long string of failed relationships and only a 12 year old daughter who is basically in her own world and a couple of dogs to come home to. I find wine has been a comfort to me. one I try to moderate but have difficulty letting go of. I am not trying to go on Violin mode here or feel sorry for myself, it is but honeslty it is difficult. I try to find comfort in the gym and other activities but I think the wine has become more of a pyshological addiction that anything else. I don't feel ready to let it go. I guess I just need to realize what it does to my vitality and work performance the next day and let it go...,or at lesat have 2 glasses. But 2 turns to 3 and then I go thru the same ritual...body aches, fuzzy thinking and depression the next day. How do u guys cope? any advice would be helpful

Thanks

Am

[CS04]

hello again

Amethyst,
I'm sorry you feel so lonely. I also believe for many of us it is more of a psychological addiction, and we all feel like crap the next day. Do you feel that you want to cut down, or quit entirely? Have you explored the MWO website? There is a lot of good information here and people willing to help.

[dove]

hello again

amethyst, i think alcohol is my only friend too some days and that is why i drink. then i start getting drunk and can't stop. i don't cope any other way. i am trying af right now and am just bored and lonely. i don't have any kind of answer but just wanted to reply and let you know there is someone here - for a minute, i am logging off to watch the news and a movie to try to sleep.
have a good night, your not alone.
BTW - your avatar picture is SOOO pretty. i think that looks like the path to heaven.
dove

[Amethyst26]

hello again

I think the path to heaven is laden with peace love and the color purple which is my favorite. For me the path to heaven would be to find the peace to be AF. At least for now, for a week...forever? I know life holds many positive and great things for us but we dull our pain and therefore our ability to feel true happiness because of drinking. Thanks for your reply, all I can say is I am here today, trying to quit and will do so. Right now it's just too damn hard and i know that is a cop out in itself. But at least I am not in denial. I know i have a prob which runs much deeper than that drinking 3 - 4 glasses of wine a night. I pray to my higher power to give me strenght and the will to stay on the path and i guess it is all i can do for today,.

[Cherbear]

hello again

Wow, Amethyst, you hit it home.. the comfort of the wine every night, but the battle of hating that "need' why can't we take it or leave it like others do. consuming the mind is what I hate the most... thinking about it on my way home from work , what a waste of my mind. I am trying to quit really quit because I know that If I try and moderate the taste of the wine just keep me desiring it.
bathing my brain and then the brain is washed! I feel so much clearer now AF for 4 days for me.
Hang in there. Scream at that monkey on your shoulder telling you its ok to have 1.

[bestlifeldms]

hello again

Amethyst26;345272 wrote: For me the path to heaven would be to find the peace to be AF. At least for now, for a week...forever?

Does peace come and then we become AF? Or do we become AF and then we experience peace? I found that it was the latter. I hope that you find your peace!

:l XXX Best

[KateH1]

hello again

Amethyst, I think you hit the nail on the head! We do dull out the good and the not so good, by drinking. I also believe that drinking prevents us from drawing those things that are our true hearts desire into our lives.

I too hope that you find the peace that you are serching for. You are on the right track!

XXX Kate

[FloridaBoy]

hello again

Amethyst26;345272 wrote: I think the path to heaven is laden with peace love and the color purple which is my favorite. For me the path to heaven would be to find the peace to be AF. At least for now, for a week...forever? I know life holds many positive and great things for us but we dull our pain and therefore our ability to feel true happiness because of drinking. Thanks for your reply, all I can say is I am here today, trying to quit and will do so. Right now it's just too damn hard and i know that is a cop out in itself. But at least I am not in denial. I know i have a prob which runs much deeper than that drinking 3 - 4 glasses of wine a night. I pray to my higher power to give me strenght and the will to stay on the path and i guess it is all i can do for today,.

This will sound trite but forgo the wine and the 'problem' may get much smaller. Then you can deal with it lucidly.

[SpiritGirl]

hello again

Amethyst ~

I can so relate to you. I am also divorced - with a 14 yr old daughter and 12 yr old son. I have also embarassed myself in front of them. (I read your post about your cousin's party).

I find comfort and relaxation to sit down each night to a glass (usually ends up being a bottle) of wine. It cures my lonliness. Really ~ as soon as that first sip hits my tongue, my mood changes. I am comforted by a familiar "friend". It intoxicates me like a lover would. It's a hard relationship to shake. I will simply continue to try each day and visit my true friends at MWO.

[Amethyst26]

hello again

Thank u, Bestlifeldms. You're right, the peace comes after not before , it's just easy to kid ourselves.
And as KateH1 says I strongly believe alcohol is blocking me from drawing that which I truly desire in my life. Florida boy is right to about the problem being smaller once u stop drinking...And .cherber you're right! That monkey gets me all the time. Thank u all for the food 4 thought. You are all right and have given me much needed motivation to go AF. First night will be the hardest (2nite) Please keep me in ur prayers! Thanks also spiritgirl...let' s come up with a plan

[jbphan]

hello again

My first night too!

:new: Just read your thread and feel like you do! I am lonely most of the time and bored! Even though I am married! I dont want alcohol to make me feel guilty and ashamed anymore. I think with the help of this site we can work together to be alcohol free! I've tried moderation, 1 leads to 2 which leads to, too much! I'm going for abstinence and I need everyone's help. We can do it, good luck and my prayers to you tonight!

[bestlifeldms]

hello again

Oh Honey! I wish I could go back to when my kids were the age your kids are right now. However, mine are grown and no chance to reclaim those days, weeks, years - and do it right this time. I am so excited that you have those years ahead of you! To create wonderful memories with the greatest gift we are given in life. Being your true "Self" as we are meant to be. Not the "self" that is defiled by alcohol. Our children learn from observing us, not by what we say. They will replicate our behaviour. You have many years left with your child. I wish you the best of those years.

Hugs, Best