Am drinking now and say WTF

[KAT20]

I am over 90 days 90 % sober and felt great. This past week I say WTF it feels good, I go now where, sex is better, i sleep better and I don't stress and obsesses so much. Bring it on:boxer:

[KAT20]

Am drinking now and say WTF

more2life, thank you for your reply. Whats been strange this past week is I wake up feeling pretty good. Is this another stage of the beast?

[startingover]

Am drinking now and say WTF

Hi Kat, congratulations on your 90 days girl!!
Do you think maybe you have other stuff to deal with and thats why you had a drink instead? My battle is exactly that, what do I do instead when things get me down and I can't cope? It's a toughie and part of the journey I think.

I hope you are OK hon.

[Ripple]

Am drinking now and say WTF

oh i remember that 90 day mark!!!! Man was that tough, i could have chewed a boot. I made onto then to 7 & 1/2 months... and now... starting over.... :l

you will be MAD @ YOU tomorrow.. :h

[sweetpea]

Am drinking now and say WTF

Kat well done on your 90 days but remember the reason why you did it

Sweetpea:l:h xx

[KAT20]

Am drinking now and say WTF

Thank you all for your support. I actually feel ok today which is what I have been saying that is kind of scary. I had two margaritas with dinner and about 4 or 5 scotch and water. What I am concerned about the most is I'm scared. I would like to moderate some day but am not sure if that will ever be a possiblity. I am scared because it seems like my tolerance has gone up and thats not good. I need to remember how proud I feel when I do not drink. I also need to look around me at the people it has effected so negatively (their drinking) I will keep coming here to read and learn. I'm sure my therapist will give me an ear full Friday. Thank you again all for being there.

[startingover]

Am drinking now and say WTF

Always here Kat. I know exactly how you are feeling. It is scary, but you can do it!
Have you had a look at the Rain in my heart post? that might help a bit.

[A Work in Progress]

Am drinking now and say WTF

It's good you're back here today, good you are talking with your therapist, and good you are seriously asking questions about whether moderation is a reasonable possibility (or worth the risk) for you.

Best wishes,

wip

[Carmac]

Am drinking now and say WTF

Kat -

Please open up to your therapist. Hopefully, he/she will help you have some insights that will help you sort this out. It's hard to do (I know. Been there, done that.) But I felt so much better and it even lead to a break through on my triggers.

Glad you are feeling better....Erin

[tlrgs]

Am drinking now and say WTF

stay strong and think positive

[KAT20]

Am drinking now and say WTF

Good morning all and thanks again More2life, Startingover, Ripple, Sweetpea, A Work in Progress, Indiamike2 and Tlrgs. Well I drank again last night. A bottle and a half of wine. I know for some that is'nt much but for me yes. I should feel like shit today but again do not. I am scared at how my brain takes over and tells me its ok. I was considering an AA meeting, anyone have any experience with that ? You have all been so kind and you encouragement means alot.

[A Work in Progress]

Am drinking now and say WTF

Absolutely, Kat, go to an AA meeting! Today! I spent 3 years in AA, a long time ago, and it was VERY helpful to me. I don't agree with all of their dogma and doctrine, BUT you can find excellent support from people who will really help you with some of the basics of getting OFF the alcohol. Do it. Find a sponsor who has a lot of sobriety and who seems to be living a life that you would like to be living, and stay close to your sponsor, and stay close to MWO.

best wishes,

wip

[rubywillow]

Am drinking now and say WTF

KAT20

Kat, grab on to whatever lifeboat you can, till you get yourself on an even keel. When you're sober, you'll be able to decide what really works for you. This is a great place, but not if you have a bottle next to your keyboard. I always thought I was the only one who did such freaky things to be able to drink, but there are lots of freaks here. (Sorry folks, I love you anyway!). Don't hate yourself. Love yourself enough to get well.:l

[Carmac]

Am drinking now and say WTF

Kat -

I attend an all women's group....not all the time but when I feel the need. Its great and they are a wonderful group offering support and often, tons of humor as to where we have been. As for the dogma, they have been very open to each finding our own pieces we absorb and follow.

Each group is different and I suggest you may need to check out a few before you find a "home". Its been awesome support for me and a great add on to MWO.

[KAT20]

Am drinking now and say WTF

I would love an all womens group, how do I find one ?