HOW MANY TIMES? I GIVE UP!!!!!!!!

[summer_holiday]

HOW MANY TIMES? I GIVE UP!!!!!!!!

Hi B. You have already received very good advice (and it will continue, for however long you need it) and i can only add my tiny bit!

I tried to give up for years and years, never going more than a few days af. Something happened to me 10 days ago that i would not EVER wish to repeat. I embarrassed myself, my kids, my husband, my friends etc etc. It was my defining moment. I CANNOT drink ANY alcohol.

When you are drinking you know you need to stop, cut down or whatever...then you wake up next morning and think 'well, that was alright, i feel like **** but i didn't do anything stupid, no one knows i was drinking....' and so the cycle repeats itself. Over and over. It wasn't till what happened to me that something clicked inside....i'd reached an all time low. Now though, after 10 days i feel like a different person.

I am a people person and sometimes felt lonely and depressed, so i called the samaritans. They listen and don't mind if you cry and get upset (which i did). There is always someone to talk to.....i also used to go to my local library and stay there mooching around the books, just to get out of the house. The people you meet in a library are always nice and friendly, and i liked the anonymity (?) of it. Plus, reading really does help concentrate the mind.

Hope i haven't rambled too much! Please take care of yourself, drink chicken soup if you can and remember that when you burst the bubble which surrounds you, the haze will go away.

Take care,


Summer x

[rubywillow]

HOW MANY TIMES? I GIVE UP!!!!!!!!

Bunky, my real demon was that I was alone. No more. Even if no on is around to answer, I come here and post my heart out. I know sooner or later someone in my family will see it and find me, and tell me they care that I am lonely and sad. This is not the regular world. We are not set up to fail. We are not judged. We are not asked to explain, or do penance, or pelted with guilt. We are told we are loved, we are understood, get up dust our butts off and get back on that pony again. But you only get get here what you give. We can't help you if you don't let us know you're here. Talk to us.

[Seacailin]

HOW MANY TIMES? I GIVE UP!!!!!!!!

Hi Bunky
I am glad that you are picking yourself up, and making a plan. I use this program and AA because I am alone too. I get really anxious at meetings sometimes, but I am starting to feel more comfortable. I need to plan things with sober people. Stay close by. You will be just fine.

[Reenie]

HOW MANY TIMES? I GIVE UP!!!!!!!!

Hi Bunky: This is such a good and inspiring thread. The advice you received is so very helpful. Not only do these posts apply to helping you, they are helping me and others on this board. Please keep in mind, Alcoholism is a disease. It gets worse over time. We unfortunates are born with a pilot light already aflame. As we reach our teens, we start drinking because it's the thing to do. It's our rite of passag into adult hood. The first drink we ever touched, fueld that pilot light. The flame grew bigger and bigger. At some time in our life the flame becomes a bonfire. We alcoholics go through a vicious cycle of diminishing the fire. After many attempts we get the fire under control and bring it back to its pilot light existence. That pilot light is forever burning and waiting for us to fuel it again with alcohol.