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    Please help!

    :new:I am a 23 year old mother to a beautiful 16 month old girl. I am engaged to a wonderful man and we are due to get married next year - everything should be perfect, but its not.

    I don't drink ever day. I can't even say I feel the need to drink everyday but normally once a week (normally a Saturday) I will have an overwhelming urge to drink wine/rose, and drink it I do.

    I drink shed loads of the stuff - i can put a whole bottle away in an hour easily and even worse, if we buy one of those boxes, I will drink the whole thing dry in one evening.

    It's almost like I have no control over myself - I have one sip of wine and I can feel it coursing through my body and I love the way it makes me feel. So that makes me want more and more until the bottle is gone.

    It even a joke amongst friends that on the odd night I do get to go out everyone has to 'keep me away from the wine' because I just get completely wrecked on it and I turn into a completely different person. I lie about the STUPIDEST of things, I cause trouble/spread rumours about people and take pleasure in things that I shouldn't. This is not me sober - when I am sober I am a nice person, I hate liars and people who talk about others. It's almost as if when im drunk, I turn into everything I despise about other people. As a result, once sobered up, (and dying of the worst hangover) I go into a massive 24 hours depression and paranoia.

    I just wish i could stop drinking completely - but I really don't think I can.

    I drank a bottle of wine last night - I was only supposed to have a glass, but it never works.

    Can anyone help? xxx

    #2
    Please help!

    Well Cynders
    Sounds like you are a binge drinker. Once you have one you are off. I was like that myself. Personally I think it may be slightly easier for a binge drinker to beat the addiction as it is only triggered in certain circumstances. You need to figure out what your triggers are and then get a plan together to beat them. If you do nothing it will only get worse and you are young so you might as well get a handle on it now as you have your whole life ahead of you. Lucky you!
    I suggest you read the book and get the supplements (L-glut especially to help with cravings) and get a plan together to beat it. Look at it positively if you can as it certainly doesnt add any benefits to your life does it! You should try for 30 days AF to kick start your plan and you will be amazed at how good you will feel even after a couple of weeks. Good luck - there is plenty of support and help here to get you through.
    BH

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      #3
      Please help!

      Welcome Cynders,
      I used to drink a 2lt box of wine every day and normally a 5Lt on weekends.... I'm pleased to say those days are behind me now.
      BH has offered some great advice -- go for it! Get a plan together, read the book, buy the supps and see your Doc.
      "The person who says it cannot be done should not interrupt the person doing it"

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        #4
        Please help!

        Cynders,

        I just wanted to add my :welcome: and say I agree with what has been stated previously.

        Get a plan into place. Something YOU can work with.

        Binge drinking is a form of alcoholism and, unfortunately, I can speak from very sad experience, it eventually leads down the path of every day alcoholism.

        Take this bull by the horns and figure out what you want to do with your life!!

        There is no reason you can't get control of this. It is up to you.

        I hope you have read the book. If not, download it and read it. No, no one's experience completely mirrors everyone else's but the book has a lot of information that RJ spent many hours of her life researching and working on.

        Glad you are here!!

        Cindi
        AF April 9, 2016

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          #5
          Please help!

          You have gotten very good advise.I am so proud of you for seeing that you are heading for trouble and taking the steps toward recovery.I was a binge drinker and could go long periods of time between drinks.Once I took that drink, the drink took me.This site has helped me not to take that first drink.We can give you that kind of help.Stay close to us.Read alot and post your feelings.You can do this.I know that you can.
          sigpicEyes on the PRIZE, a SOBER Future !!!

          Comment


            #6
            Please help!

            Hi cynders,

            I'm so glad you posted and found us! I just want to say welcome and I, too, strongly recommend reading the My Way Out book. I love the wine, too. It gets a grip on me. A very unhealthy grip.

            Thanks for sharing :l

            Becoming
            "Action is...the enemy of thought." :l Joseph Conrad

            Comment


              #7
              Please help!

              :welcome:
              Cyn-
              You sound llike me 15 years ago.....you're still young. Now is the time to deal with your drinking problem. Yes, you have a drinking problem we all do! Yor age gives you an advantage but, you still have time to start drinking more often, and it will happen if you don't start to help yourself now....You can do it!

              Your daughter needs you sober. She is young enought that she doesn't see you drink now. Trust me..you don't want her to see you like that. :upset:

              Stick around here, read some posts. This is a place that understands everything you go through.
              :teeter:JAMMS

              "I'm safe.. up high...no one can touch me...why do I feel this party's over?...."

              "no pain..inside...you're my protection...how do I feel this good SOBER?!"

              Comment


                #8
                Please help!

                Cynder, you are a nice person and a good person. Alcohol changes people, some become the "fun" of the party, some become very sad and some turn into this horrible hurtful person. You are not the only one.
                But, you are the one who can change that.
                Good luck.

                Comment


                  #9
                  Please help!

                  Hi cynder_ella,
                  Binge drinking is my curse too.
                  Once I start, I drink till either the drinks gone, or I pass out. Bottles of vadka for days in a row. I thought I would never get out the hole that I had made for myself but since coming here I've managed to substantially curtail it.
                  Read up on the suppliments and meds available. There are many people here who will help and advise you, without judging you. You're young enough still to stop this curse ruining your life.
                  You've found a great place. Ihope you find the answer you're looking for

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Please help!

                    Welcome Cynder,
                    It's is such a great thing that you have realized that you need help at this point in your life. You are young, you have a baby and are getting ready to get married.
                    I don't know when you started binging however there are several moms out here that love their children dearly and began drinking way too much after the children were born. Now is a great time to get your life back in control for yourself, your baby and for anymore children that you may have.
                    "Keep your eyes and heart focused on the end goal at all times, and never settle for less."

                    Comment


                      #11
                      Please help!

                      Hi C-

                      Welcome to MWO! How lovely that you have a blessed little one and a committed relationship. Every reason and motivation to want to be the loving wonderful person that you are, all of the time. You are very fortunate & insightful to realize that this is a problem at such a young age. Too many of us remain in denial, for wayyyyyyyy too many decades, before making the necessary changes in our bahavior. In the mean time, so much of what we love and care about can be destroyed or damaged beyond repair. I was like you. There was no such thing as just one or two. I finally quit at the age of 55. I would love to have each of those years back, but I am, at least, happy that I quit when I did. Remember, this is a progressive disease. I have heard this experession before and think it is so appropriate. "If I can't be a good example, then let me be a huge warning!" Good Luck with your goals. Hugs, Best
                      "It wasn't all I wanted, but all I could stand!":bigwink: Alcohol free since April 8, 2008

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Please help!

                        smiles

                        I am sorry I have not logged on for a couple of days - I have been at college (think I forgot to mentionn the fact that I have just gone back to college to become a teacher).

                        I am soooo amazed at the warm responses I have received - I have never talked to anyone about this before, I mean you know you have those jokes with your friends "im never drinking again" or "I 'm drinking too much - really need to stop" and those statements are met with "yeah yeah - if ya say so."

                        Well I haven't had anything to drink since Wednesday night (its now Sat morning) and I feel a bit better already. Tonight I have a 50th wedding anniversary to go to tonight with my family - I am going to try so hard not to touch anything - not even the "one glass of wine" (the one that NEVER ends up being just the one.)

                        It was my birthday last Saturday and we had a bit of a party here and loads of people bought bottles of wine and rose... there is one left in my fridge and last night, my partner (who doesn't really know how I feel - he drinks himself, but doesn't seem to have a problem with alcohol) and after I had bathed and put baby to bed he said "fancy a glass of rose" and I said "no" he laughed when I told him I was going to lay off the drink for a while because it was making me feel a bit down - he said "well you've got one more bottle in here so you might as well finish it and then start not drinking" but I was strong and stuck to my guns - about twice I think I did consider going and pouring myself a glass, but I didn't - but at the same time, I can't bring myself to pour it down the sink!

                        Sorry about the essay guys - thank you so much for all the lovely messages, where can I get this book from???

                        Hope everyone is well

                        Also I have another reason to smile today - yesterday I got mu first essay back and I passed it with merit - so at the moment, I am smiling!

                        xxxx

                        Comment


                          #13
                          Please help!

                          cynder_ella,
                          That was fantastic..
                          Staying strong and true to Yourself and not drinking despite the pressure (friendly though it was) took guts, which you obviously have.
                          Maybe you could let your boyfriend know the depth of your worries and then he wouldn't be as casual about it. You have a rosy future in front of you if you can control this. It will get the better of you, as it did so many on this site, if you let it.
                          If you don't want to drink tonight, don't. You may find this hard to believe, I did, but other people care little whether you drink or not. You'll get some questions, but there's nothing wrong with not drinking at social functions. Lots of people don't and have a great time . I just smile and tell them that I don't feel like it today. I got some wierd looks in reply, but then (I'm not proud to say) I was drinking 5/6/7 bottles of vodka a week, and was expected to be falling-down-drunk on a regular basis.
                          Well done on the alcohol free days. That's brilliant!
                          I hope that you have a great weekend.
                          Stay strong!

                          (I got the book from Amazon.com)

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Please help!

                            Cynder,
                            Welcome!!!! Pour it down the drain because that one bottle will become 5 lickity split! No doubt about it....it does so easily!!!!!! As we all know. Binge drinking is my game too and so incredibly bad for your system...what a state of shock it must go in to ...uh???? sane to insane in seconds. Please get the book!!!
                            Forever loved, forever missed Papa Bear

                            Comment


                              #15
                              Please help!

                              as many hav said welcom,with a big W,,ahahhahah,your the same age as my oldest son,who by the way is also teaching this week,last year of university,i got 4 kids,children,im just sittin here thinkin if you were my daughter wht would i say if you asked for help.i hope this helps,my oldet daughter who is 28,who like the rest of my kids,is very smart,somtimes to smart,genious,but like the rest not smart enuff to defeat, AL,has a boyfreind who comes from the same genes,my 2nd daughter who also, is studying to be in, child psycology,3 rd yer of universcity,has the same gene,somtimes goes over board but as of now has control,then theres the teacher,big boy,looks like arnold swortsa whtever,body builder,almost as good lookin as me,hahaha,he can pound back whtever,shell i go on,i have one more like me,he s my yungest,and i can see he could be like me,when you come to the realization you have a problem which you have, half the battle is over,be strong you found a great site, use it, we care gyco

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