Help.

[Cinders]

I do not start this thread lightly.

I am lost.

Totally.

Love you guys.
Cindi

[startingover]

Help.

Cinders, whats wrong hun?

[startingover]

Help.

I thought you may have been struggling a bit this week...

[Cinders]

Help.

I am a drunk.

Help.

Starting.

Not kidding. I am a drunk.

Today, tomorrow, the next day.

I am sooooo tired of being a drunk.

Love,
Cindi

[startingover]

Help.

Cindi..are you drinking now?

[Cinders]

Help.

Yes.

[startingover]

Help.

I dont know if this is of any use to you Cindi, but sometimes what we tell ourselves becomes a self fulfilling prophecy...
Can you not repeatedly tell youreself what you want to hear...until somewhere, somehow you begin to love yourself and believe it?

[startingover]

Help.

Cindi, when you are sober you are in control and you seem mostly happy....when you are drinking, you seem so sad....I wish I could wave a magic wand so that you would never want to drink.
What triggered it?

[bloggy]

Help.

Cindi, I know this maybe a stupid thing to say, but can you try to stop now? You know the more you have the harder things will become- could you just try to put it down and get some water in you?

[hippie37]

Help.

Cindi!

I've never believed that saying once an alcoholic always an alcoholic. It just doesn't sit right with me (even though I know recovery is a lifelong journey) as it's so negative. You are NOT a drunk Cindi. You and I both know it's our thinking that's the problem and not the substance. I AM NOT A DRUNK OR A JUNKIE. I use substances to avoid life on life's terms and it's my thinking that keeps me in active addiction. Nothing else has worked for me Cindi not even the Antabuse because I could never accept my fate as it where even while on them.

I finally got my basic text last night in N/A (the big book in AA) and upon realising this an older member asked me if he could sign my book. He didn't even have to ask my name and he wrote this: To Phil: If you keep doing what you are doing right now, you will hold onto this new life you are living & it will get better and better & remember YOU DESERVE IT. Love and Respect in the Fellowship Joey and familly. I was quite emotional at that tbh. CINDI YOU DESERVE IT TOO LOVE. Keep telling yourself that. You are not a worthless drunk you DESERVE TO BE HAPPY.

I know it's hard to put down the drink once you've had one as I know how true the old cliche is that one is too many and a thousand never enough. Have you still got a sponsor in AA that you can phone Cindi or someone close from any of your meetings that you could chat with?. I know the damage is already done but I know how much it helps just to talk to someone in person.

I love you dearly my friend and I'm only sorry I can't be around today because I have to pick my daughter up in half an hour and is one of the few days I get to spend with her. I'll be thinking of you and sending you positive vibrations today. I'll pm you later hon and tomorrow.

Love and Happiness
Hippie
xx

[gyco]

Help.

hi cinders,i think hipster said it all,there are ways to beat the illness,you have to find what works for you,you no were in your corner cheering you on,gyco

[cuckoosnest83]

Help.

Cindi, don't know what to say dear other than I wish I could be of some help. I'm thinking of you and hoping you get through this. You deserve so much better.

[Doggygirl]

Help.

Cindi I'm just now reading this. You CAN STOP. I know you can. I believe in you Cindi and so does everyone here. Have you called your sponsor????? Your green blob is turned off so I hope that means you are getting help.

DG

[Evie.Lou]

Help.

Cindy, do you remember many moons ago that we spoke about how much we have in common and how we would be able to understand each other and share intimate things that others wouldn't understand...
Well we didn't carry thru very much on that but........... the deal still goes...I am only a PM away...Please let's reconnect.

[llsadaa1]

Help.

Cindi I know this is harsch but call a friend or family member and have them drive you to a detox center from there see about treatment facilities. These will help if you truly want to stop. Or call a nearby AA group and talk to a member. They are there to help and have been like you.