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    #1

    Opps i did it again

    Dam dam it more dam IT.......Here i am with a hangover.. feeling sorry for myself and shame.. I was doing so well and as soon as i was in a social situation BOOM need for drink.. See no one understands that now i feel as i rely on drink to make me more social, chatty, heir go, more fun and socialy accepted..
    So now look at me.. looking rough, and feeling that dreaded sickness and stomach churn.. :eeew:dizzy head and messy lol
    Why do i put myself through this.. what the hell is wrong with me Grrr.. i need a hug
    ~I hope I didn't brain my damage~:crazymonkey:
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    #2
    Opps i did it again

    Hi Browneyez, I was wondering where you got to.
    I remember you because I know MK very well.
    OK, so now you know you cant drink socially at least for a while?
    Why dont you try and do 30 days sober? While you are doing it, learn about your relationship with yourself and alcohol and see what you can do to make it healthier. At the end of 30 days you might decide you feel so great you dont want to keep on poisoning yourself any longer.
    Give something a go tho, because it sounds like you are quite down at the moment.
    Living now and not just existing since 9th July 2008
    Nicotine Free since 6th February 2009

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      #3
      Opps i did it again

      Hi there brown. I know how difficult it can be not drinking when you are with people in a social situation. Being young is another huge hurdle, as there are lots who binge drink, without it seeming to be a daily problem for them. I have just turned 34, and have been fighting this disease since early teens. It was fun for a while, but after time, the enjoyment went away, and the mental obsession with drinking replaced it. If I wasnt drinking, I would be thinking about it. And if I wasnt drinking, boy did I let everyone know I wasnt! They use 3 words in AA that jumped out at me. Restless, Irritable and Discontent. When I wasnt drinking, I was like this all the time, building up that anger inside me until I exploded! I would tell the world to fuck off, dissapear into my own little world and binge for 3-5 days until my body couldnt take anymore. Then the feelings of paranoia, remorse, worry about what I said and did would stay with me for days. Id decide to stop for a week and then, and so the cycle began again.
      I have found AA a great help, and came to a point in my life when I knew I couldnt mod, balance my drinking or drink like other people. I knew that alcohol was to be my downfall and death in one way or another if I didnt stop for good.
      Its been far from easy. I have had ups and downs, and at times the depression and that mental obsession has been cripling. But, I have drunk just once since Feb 2 this year, and I can say 100% that my life is so much better. Sure, I have shit to deal with, no job, bills etc, but I deal with them daily and have a programme of recovery that works for me. I know I cant have a drink, but I also dont want one, and this has been the major change for me.
      Its good to meet you, and I wish you well on your journey. We see many who come and go here, and I hope you decide to stay and join this big family on our journey to recovery.
      Cy.
      To Infinity And Beyond!!

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        #4
        Opps i did it again

        BIG HUG'S!!
        Ditto on what Starts has adviced -- doing 30 days AF really helps to give your body time to get all the AL out of your system and begin the healing process.

        I hear you on drinking to be more "fun" but really who are we kidding? It's not "fun" to wake up the next morning with NO recollection of the night before and nor is it "fun" when we hurt ourselves (and those that love us) with our stupid drunken actions.

        Sending you loads of strength to face this challenge.
        "The person who says it cannot be done should not interrupt the person doing it"

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          #5
          Opps i did it again

          I know how you feel. I am trying to quit myself. I believe that this is ether my 4th or 5th attempt at it. I am quitting more for a faith reason. But I am also starting to become an alcoholic.

          (((((((((((((((((((HUG))))))))))))))))))))
          I quit drinking on March 8, 2020. Taking it One Day At A Time and no more taking my quit for granted.

          Also doing it for me. I got to stay sober for me.

          Just consecrate on today and do what you can to remain sober for today and worry about staying sober tomorrow, tomorrow.

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            #6
            Opps i did it again

            Browneyes, gosh dont we all know how you feel. We all think we are going to be more fun, etc. after drinking. I used to think that i was so attractive drinking. Recently while drinking ive looked at myself in the mirror and you know what..i go from nice looking to really not attractive at all. Its a good reason to give it up.

            Pluse the next day with the baggy eyes, upset stomach etc. Anyway stick in there. We are here for you

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              #7
              Opps i did it again

              Thanks guys you really cheered me up.. Knowing that everyone feels the same is a like a whole lot of hugs hehe
              ~I hope I didn't brain my damage~:crazymonkey:

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                #8
                Opps i did it again

                :l Hope you feel better soon.
                Recovery Coaching website

                "Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending." - Carl Bard wl:

                Recovery Videos

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                  #9
                  Opps i did it again

                  I too have been MIA from this board. Recently I went with DH to his social function and needless to say I drank far too many and we ended up having a fight. We have made up since then but I am at my wits end. I too drink to be happy but end up in a total miserable stage for days after. Today is Day 3 and although I am not craving a drink, I am hating what I have become.

                  As AA is not for me, I think I can control myself - but then again I disappoint everyone around me. Today is a very sad day. Thanks for letting me share as I really cannot talk to anyone else. DH knows but tries to cope and actually loves to drink, so after a few days, we are back at it.

                  Someone said Faith...I want to believe in powers up above so bad.......there has to be more out there...:upset:
                  :new: Jas56

                  Comment

                    #10
                    Opps i did it again

                    Thanks for replying to me Zen. It really is up to me but it sure seems sometimes to be an impossible feat.....
                    :new: Jas56

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