My heart just broke when I read your post. I am so glad that you had something inside you that made you come here and talk. We all have so many outside influences that can seem unmanagable, and some that we definately have no control over and have to let go. As you can see from this thread, so many of us have felt what you are feeling, so you do have a truly sympathetic group of friends here.
I am so sorry that you are going through so much all at the same time. But, I am also glad that you are reaching out. Often times, when we start to verbalize what is inside, it starts to work itself out or at least seem not so big.
Know you are loved for who you are and you have many people that are willing to drop everything to lend a hand - just don't forget to reach.
All my love and blessings,
MM
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