I have the tools, why can't I stop this???!

[paula]

I have the tools, why can't I stop this???!

Hi Colbe, hope you are feeling better today. Like Cindi and others have said ignore the nasties, not worth the energy.

[colbe]

I have the tools, why can't I stop this???!

I did Ok today, not great, but progress was made. I didn't know about the Block I could put on that negativer person and I need to look into the fight club. You guys are so wonderful, really!

My baby step accomplishments today were:
(DeeBee) I showered
I went to SS to qualify for benifits fo eat,,,f***ing humiliating.
Cslled a carreer center, that is for people that don't speak english and I have a masters.
Called every architetual signage company in the area, have a couple appts. but notihng that is hiring.
Did not get to look into volunteering yet, due to lack of electicity, phone is dead again.
Trying to get a govt. assisted phone...hassel with the area I live in now..BTW someone asked and I forgot to answer....Beech Grove, TN. IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWEHERE!!!!!!!

I called the IOP (Intensive Outpatient Program in Manchester today to tell them I cannot attend due to my Insurance running out yesterday. She told me to come in and gave me incorragement that she could do something about it. PLEASE let this work, I am scared to death and could lose my girl over my weakness.

I know I can do this, I just don't know when given all this stress. With my ins. out I had write a 5 pg letter to my primary that knows all the details of this messed up situation with my daughter. Please guys, hang with me....Colbe.

[paula]

I have the tools, why can't I stop this???!

Well done Colbe, we are all with you in this battle.
Good luck. x

[colbe]

I have the tools, why can't I stop this???!

thankyouthankyouthankyou.

[colbe]

I have the tools, why can't I stop this???!

Sheri;705976 wrote: Hi Colbe,

That is a question that we have all asked ourselves over and over and over again, ad nauseum! I know I have, that?s for sure!

Can?t speak for you or anyone else here, but I know that for me, it was because at some level, no matter how much I wanted to quit (and I did), I was giving myself permission to have that first drink, which was always the hook to the next one, and the one after that, and so on, until I just said "to hell with it" and drank it all because after all, ?I already screwed up anyway, so what's the point in stopping now.? Of course, that scenario always began with some mental foreplay beforehand between me, myself and I like, "Boy, I could use a drink,? or ?I had a bad day," or "I'll just have one," or "I'll quit tomorrow," or "fill in the blank."

In all honesty, in order for me to quit, I had to STOP giving myself permission to take the first drink! No matter what I told myself, the answer had to always be "NO!" Having a drink was simply NOT an option! Engaging in the mental foreplay was off limits! Period! End of story! No ifs, ands, or buts about it! I had to tell myself ENOUGH! ALCOHOL IS RUINING MY LIFE (and it is, you know)! ALCOHOL IS STEALING MY INTELLIGENCE, MY DIGNITY, AND MY SELF-WORTH (and it is, you know)! ALCOHOL IS KILLING ME (and it is, you know)!

In short, you have got to fight back and do whatever it takes to win back your life, and you are the only one who can do it! That means getting all the alcohol out of the house, staying away from the bars no matter what, going to AA meetings, participating in outplacement rehab, eating healthy food, taking supplements, drinking lots of water with lemon, getting lots of rest, exercising even if you don't want to, posting here, reaching out to sober friends, staying away from drinking ones, avoiding all other triggers, going to church, volunteering, looking for a job, reading about alcoholism and how others have won the battle, and so on.

It?s also time to banish the negative thinking and self-talk because that?s only going to keep you stuck where you are and where you are is not where you want to be! So, instead of asking yourself why you can?t do this, start telling yourself, ?I CAN DO THIS!? Not just once, not just twice, but a million times a day, even if you don?t believe it! Start your day saying it as soon as you wake up, and keep saying it again and again until you fall asleep at night, ?I CAN DO THIS!?

I know it's not easy, Colbe, and the reason I know is because I've been there, but I believe that there is hope for each and every one of us to beat this addiction, including you!

We are all routing for you 100%!!!

Sheri

This was such a wonderful post, I hated it. You said everything I didn't want to hear, but already knew. I have an apt with IOP tomottow at 10AM. I have no insurance, but they said that's ok...not sure what that means, I guess I will find out tomorrow.

Sheri and everyone, thanks for keep hanging in there with me. I feel like I am being monotomus, (positive I spelled that wrong).

It feels good to be able to get on this site anytime and know I will hear back by some by morning.

I will post back after my apointment tomorrow morning. (IOP=Intensive Oupatient)

DeeBee, did you run?

Have a good night guys,
Best,
Colbe

[DeeBee]

I have the tools, why can't I stop this???!

Good luck for the interview today Colbe.
I'm really impressed with how motivated you are -- you go girl!!

(And no, I didn't go for a run -- I'm waiting for you:-))

[Guitarista]

I have the tools, why can't I stop this???!

Go for it Colbe! You can do it.

Great post Sheri.

Best wishes..........

[one2many]

I have the tools, why can't I stop this???!

Good Luck Colbe..this really is doable!! Oh and don't mind that Pm person.....sad little nitwit who is not worth the time or energy it takes to read their crap...put them on ignore and be done with it...

EXCELLENT post Sheri....I think you should put it in the toolbox thread..

[Beaches]

I have the tools, why can't I stop this???!

Great post Sheri, that is everything that goes on in my head and a great way to turn it all around.

Good luck Colbe, we are here with you.

[colbe]

I have the tools, why can't I stop this???!

Moving this thread out of the Need Help ASAP...

[LozzyJane]

I have the tools, why can't I stop this???!

Fight Club

:new:Me being a new member, I don't know what Fight Club is - can someone tell me please?

[sunshine_gg]

I have the tools, why can't I stop this???!

A forum thread in the Introductions/Beginners section