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[Emmy]

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:new: Hi Spun , I'm Emmy , Hang in there , today is a NEW day and a new start. I'm walking right beside you , lets do this together :l Em

[Winefree]

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Wow. Like the thinking about the past. My second husband keeps telling me I live in the past too much. I always think about what if I did this, or I did that, maybe things would have been better. No use, the past is over. We all need to live for today and hope for tomorrow to come.

Winefree

[spun]

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Woke up feeling sick today - drank a bottle of wine yesterday afternoon so no reason for feeling so wiggy this morning - no way would I usually be ill after that. I went into work and felt totally out of it! Very surreal and anxious, my head not at all functional. I took a half sick day and have done little else but drink, eat a tonne of vietnamese food and watch sitcoms. Went to the pub for a last hoorah and won $150 then blew $100 of it. Got caught in a huge hail storm and thought that was a fitting end to my visits to the pub.

Actually felt thankful I could walk free out in the rain, but pathetic for carrying a bottle of wine and a packet of ciggs home in a plastic bag like some bloody wino.

My birthday is a few days away and that's my big decider for turning over a new leaf and getting my shit together. I really need to just get the fuck over myself and grow up.

I don't want to leave anyone feeling like I'm a lost cause. Probably should quit posting until I have my act together and get on the wagon. I don't want to bring anyone down or waste such good advice.I appreciate everything you guys have been saying. I know what I need to do - I just need the balls to do it.

[IAD]

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That's what happens when you do the dirty deed in the sky ! (Screw Up !) Ha! Don't worry about it....keep your chin up and continue to work it out ! IAD

[spun]

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Man IAD that made me laugh despite my sad state! Nice one, and thanks

[IAD]

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No problem Spun.........where all here to cheer each other up.....and give you confedense ! Best wishes !AD

[dill]

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I don't want to leave anyone feeling like I'm a lost cause. Probably should quit posting until I have my act together and get on the wagon. I don't want to bring anyone down or waste such good advice.I appreciate everything you guys have been saying. I know what I need to do - I just need the balls to do it.

Spun, Don't give up, and DON'T quit posting! Each and every one of us have been where you are today. This site wouldn't exist if we quit posting at that point! :HCount your AF days and move forward. It's progress, not perfection!

Good one, IAD!

[spun]

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Thanks dill - and I love your sig

[drylifeahead]

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Wow Spun..reading your posts, it's like you've gotten into my brain.
I'm making myself post, and truly find everyone on this site so helpful.
Each Sunday night I swore was the last night...said it so many times.
Each Monday afternoon would find me in the beer store for another week of drinking.
This is my 4th go at being AF, and I think I've got it this time.
Keep posting..you're here and it's a great step, as is your AF days. Good for you!
Don't give up!!

[franziasgone]

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Drylifeahead:

This is only your 4th go at being AF???

I wish I could say that!!!
I stopped counting a long time ago......:sigh:

[drylifeahead]

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franzia'sgone;731855 wrote: Drylifeahead:

This is only your 4th go at being AF???

I wish I could say that!!!
I stopped counting a long time ago......:sigh:

I should clear up and say my 4th SERIOUS go at being AF. There have been countless times where I would try and moderate my drinking. That simply does not work for me.

[spun]

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drylifeahead it sucks doesn't it?

I had, what I hope, is my last big binge last night. I'm off away for the weekend and although alcohol will be around it will not really be the environment for 'my kind' of drinking. I too have tried so many times to moderate and each failure has taught me that I must just stay away. I can't try and trick myself into thinking I have the willpower to leave it at just one or two drinks.

Feeling well hungover and dodgy today. I was having a bit of a talk to myself and feeling guilty for last night's booze-up (as you do) and the words "Be happy because this is the last time you'll need to feel this if you do it right" came out!

I will be coming here a lot in the coming months to get on top of this. I'm giving it a real serious go this time.

Best of luck!

[Emmy]

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Keep posting SPUN , we all need eachother , whether I just read some posts or write alittle something , just coming into the site everyday reminds me what my goal is !!

[drylifeahead]

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And best of luck to you as well Spun! You CAN do it.

I always thought I had the willpower to mod, and would feel panicky thinking I had to quit altogether. Alcohol was my friend...I liked it, how could I never drink again? Til after enough times and stories I finally realized this is no friend of mine and am happy to leave it behind.
Sometimes he whispers to me that I do in fact have the willpower to mod. I'm learning to just ignore the whispers..I've fooled myself enough, and it's ok.

We do need eachother Emmy..you are sooo right. If I hadn't found this place a week ago, I don't know where my head would be right now. Everyone here is giving me the strength to go on.

DLA