I need an uplifting pep talk
Wise words Sheep.
Be gentle with yourself Greenie. You've come a long way since that psychedelic pantaloons (big girls pants) phase! AND have faith that this too shall pass. You're doing GREAT!
Love and Light and God bless you sweetie
Phil
xx
Sheepish;736584 wrote: Very simply put-
'This too shall pass.'
Remember where you were a year ago Greenie- and all of the hard work that you have done.
I think a great pep talk would be to look at some of your OWN old posts and see the Progression of Greenie. This is absolutely a pivotal and milestone marking point in your journey and unfortunately there is no way around it but THROUGH it. But you have already DONE THAT. Look at your old posts. While the 'marker' may be the paperwork- you have been preparing for this for a long time. And you have a lot of tools and a lot of friends. I am glad you reached out here. You are loved.
-Sheep
'This too shall pass.'
Remember where you were a year ago Greenie- and all of the hard work that you have done.
I think a great pep talk would be to look at some of your OWN old posts and see the Progression of Greenie. This is absolutely a pivotal and milestone marking point in your journey and unfortunately there is no way around it but THROUGH it. But you have already DONE THAT. Look at your old posts. While the 'marker' may be the paperwork- you have been preparing for this for a long time. And you have a lot of tools and a lot of friends. I am glad you reached out here. You are loved.
-Sheep
Only a few weeks ago I felt so uneasy and irritable with myself. I didn't quite known whether I was coming or going. I want fellowship but I don’t want to go to meetings. I want company but I want solitude as well. I want serenity but would prefer to wallow in self-pity and melancholy.
It had felt like a grey cloud has been hanging over my head just waiting to get me ‘wet’ and soak my through. Yet instead of taking shelter in fellowship, I remained glued in this state of confusion, like a frightened rabbit stuck in the headlights of a car. My thoughts at the time (and thank god they were only thoughts) were, ‘Just do yourself a favour Phil, bypass the drink and go and score some ‘gear’ because you’ll be doing everyone a favour if you just **** off and die.’
It was my head getting involved in the first place that actually brought me to this state of confusion. I had started to gauge how well I was doing through this dark period by how I felt the previous day. NOT a good sign I know!
I’ve always found it hard handing things over to a higher power when I don’t know what it is I’m supposed to be handing over. Some days I almost visualise myself reaching my hand up to sky and opening my hand to turn my will and my life over to the care of God, only to hear a response back of ‘Urgh? Your hand is empty my friend, what do you expect me to do with it?’
Usually, I would recognise this feeling of sadness and confusion and be able to hand it over, no problem. But as soon as my head gets ‘involved’ in the equation I get swamped in analysis of the cause and effects. I get lost with what it is I’m REALLY feeling.
I learned a valuable lesson through this though. No matter how bad things may seem, if I stay close to fellowship, no matter how hard my head doesn’t want me there, I can usually find some serenity and peace of mind with fellow addicts.
I was finally able to just sit with myself in silence and just accept that this is life on life’s terms… I am going to get moments of sadness as well as joy, happiness and all the other good feelings that seem to have been abundant in my life of late.
My prayers were answered and I felt some kind of release from that madness. I felt some gratitude and love enter my life and I ended up spending a good day with my daughter. Although I was still a little ‘blue’ for a while I had more faith in that phrase ‘This too shall pass!’
My sponsor actually said to me, "Phil! If you weren’t struggling during this early stage in your recovery mate, I WOULD be worried about you!"
I think some days I just need to put down that stick I beat myself up with for everything not being perfect in my life.
It had felt like a grey cloud has been hanging over my head just waiting to get me ‘wet’ and soak my through. Yet instead of taking shelter in fellowship, I remained glued in this state of confusion, like a frightened rabbit stuck in the headlights of a car. My thoughts at the time (and thank god they were only thoughts) were, ‘Just do yourself a favour Phil, bypass the drink and go and score some ‘gear’ because you’ll be doing everyone a favour if you just **** off and die.’
It was my head getting involved in the first place that actually brought me to this state of confusion. I had started to gauge how well I was doing through this dark period by how I felt the previous day. NOT a good sign I know!
I’ve always found it hard handing things over to a higher power when I don’t know what it is I’m supposed to be handing over. Some days I almost visualise myself reaching my hand up to sky and opening my hand to turn my will and my life over to the care of God, only to hear a response back of ‘Urgh? Your hand is empty my friend, what do you expect me to do with it?’
Usually, I would recognise this feeling of sadness and confusion and be able to hand it over, no problem. But as soon as my head gets ‘involved’ in the equation I get swamped in analysis of the cause and effects. I get lost with what it is I’m REALLY feeling.
I learned a valuable lesson through this though. No matter how bad things may seem, if I stay close to fellowship, no matter how hard my head doesn’t want me there, I can usually find some serenity and peace of mind with fellow addicts.
I was finally able to just sit with myself in silence and just accept that this is life on life’s terms… I am going to get moments of sadness as well as joy, happiness and all the other good feelings that seem to have been abundant in my life of late.
My prayers were answered and I felt some kind of release from that madness. I felt some gratitude and love enter my life and I ended up spending a good day with my daughter. Although I was still a little ‘blue’ for a while I had more faith in that phrase ‘This too shall pass!’
My sponsor actually said to me, "Phil! If you weren’t struggling during this early stage in your recovery mate, I WOULD be worried about you!"
I think some days I just need to put down that stick I beat myself up with for everything not being perfect in my life.
Love and Light and God bless you sweetie
Phil
xx
ray:
Hang something up on these fellows......sorry best I can do ! ha! IAD
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