I am broken, Stress got to me

[changemylife]

I am drinking, do not want to stop, I am basically heart brroken and lonely. My marriage has gone to hell, there is nothing there. All the people i care about are not around. It just sucks.

I was let down today and it just pushed me over the edge. Most likely, i will be fine tomorrow, get back up and start over. I just did a 30 day AF and extreme modration for over a year. I feel like it is slipping away.

I am weak right now. I am unable to do and be where i want to be. It is amazing how one can be so strong and then so weak. I wish i couls always be strong. So many people rely on me and count on me to keep things going. It is a huge strain and huge pressure.

No one really knows what it takes to make this whole thing run. :upset:

[Guest]

I am broken, Stress got to me

Isn't this crazy. I know. Sorry for you.

[Zeppie2]

I am broken, Stress got to me

Hiya Change, please stop drinking, you know it's not going to help anything. We are all here for you.

[tawnywitch]

I am broken, Stress got to me

I havent been posting lately, I lost my way a bit too, my life is very stressfull at the moment, I am drinking too much again, seem to have gone right back to the begining, but worse because the wlii power to even start has gone too at the moment, I am too tired to think of changing at the moment, its easier to carry on the way I am, I didnt mean to turn this into a moan about me, I just wanted you to know , you are not alone, it happen's, you have managed much better that me in the past, you will again, I wasnt going to post anything but you made me realise, I feel exactly the same as you do at the moment, try to be strong, it will get better,

[startingover]

I am broken, Stress got to me

Hi change, I am so sorry you are having a rough time right now.
I really get that feeling of one moment being strong and the next feeling like the world is caving in. I was like that last weekend and started popping pain killers again. I was very close to picking up a drink too.
What helped me was talking to people here and holding my hand out and asking for help. We all could do with a helping hand sometimes my friend.

[changemylife]

I am broken, Stress got to me

you know, i am strong. but i just want this one night to have a few more. Maybe i will have a hangover and feel like shit. i can pick myself back up tomorrow

[changemylife]

I am broken, Stress got to me

Zeppie2;766443 wrote: Hiya Change, please stop drinking, you know it's not going to help anything. We are all here for you.

no its not, i know. funny how our minds just dont "get it " sometimes

[changemylife]

I am broken, Stress got to me

Thanks Sheri, my special someone is having her own issues right now.

[byebyebridgetjones]

I am broken, Stress got to me

Hi There,
I'm sure you are right. Tomorrow you will wake up and start putting it all back together again.
But part of your post struck me.

I wish i couls always be strong. So many people rely on me and count on me to keep things going. It is a huge strain and huge pressure.

NONE of us can ALWAYS be strong.....
And we have to learn to put ourselves first. I know how that sounds to people like 'us'. But if we don't look after ourselves first, we'll be no good to anyone.
I hate to preach, and hope I don't appear to. But food for thought eh ?
Bridget

[changemylife]

I am broken, Stress got to me

guess it happens. i am done. i need to pick up the pieces.

I just hope i didnt do too much damage to my relationship when she finds out.

I has 3 beers and 2 glases of wine. Not real bad as far a volume. Bad as far as reason i drank.

[rubywillow]

I am broken, Stress got to me

Change, today has been a bad one. You said you wanted this one day, and you have had that, right? I am so sorry for your broken heart. Sometimes there are no words to comfort in times like this, but you have people who care, and who share in your sorrow. You do have to think about tomorrow at some point, and then you must take care of yourself, you can't drown this problem. Please, take care today, and if I can do or say anything, or just chat, let me know. This too shall pass. I know it doesn't seem like that now, or that it's easy for me to say, but it will, and tomorrow will come. Be good to yourself.
Rubes

[redhibiscus]

I am broken, Stress got to me

Change,
I've followed your story, and remember that you and your significant other have been struggling for a while, and you have felt lonely and left out.... It is really tough when your significant other and you are not on the same page. It seems that you have done well for the most part, learned alot about sober living and have been able to get back to sober living after slipping a few times. Do that again, get back to where you were AF. I am really not one to talk, but I know from experience that drinking helps for a short time only. You are a sensitive and loving person and put alot of pressure on yourself, this can be good to a certain extent, but you are only human, and cannot be everything to everyone. So go easy on yourself, and pick yourself bac k up. I respect what I know of your journey, and know you are deserving of the best. Take care.

[greeneyes]

I am broken, Stress got to me

change... :l It is hard to let go of trying to fix things. When there is trouble on an airplane, they tell you to put your oxygen mask on first. Good advice that I see Bridge and others giving.

[changemylife]

I am broken, Stress got to me

Thanks, i got maybe 1 hour of sleep. I will try and pick up the pieced today

[greeneyes]

I am broken, Stress got to me

change, relative to picking up the pieces, one thing that worked for me was to do something - a project or something that had immediate visibile results. I benefit from a sense of accomplishment. Rake leaves, wash the car, make a soup or casserole. Don't dwell on yesterday. Have a good day today. Loose the guilt. More :l:l.