Oh God...what happened..

[Gold]

Oh God...what happened..

Happened to me too! After 77 days I thought I would try "a glass of wine", it was ok at first but then back to square one. I agree with others, I think it is something we have to experience for ourselves and ultimately it strengthens ones resolve. I'm at 30 days again now, and looking back since joining MWO, despite the forays into experimentation, I was over two thirds AF which was a huge improvement.

Consider it to be a necessary and valuable part of the journey.

[drylifeahead]

Oh God...what happened..

Jessie, after some time being AF, I did regret my chosen name. Now, for me, it is so appropriate. You`re right
the `ahead` sounds...hmmmm, what is the word...just, hopeful..not definite.

No, now I am completely happy with that name. My life is going to be dry...ahead. It`s ok.

Thank you thank you thank you all for reminding me I am not an anomaly here. Not some freakish fool, all on my own.
That, even the SECOND time around, this can be won.

DLA :l

[drylifeahead]

Oh God...what happened..

Gold;794575 wrote: Happened to me too! After 77 days I thought I would try "a glass of wine", it was ok at first but then back to square one. I agree with others, I think it is something we have to experience for ourselves and ultimately it strengthens ones resolve. I'm at 30 days again now, and looking back since joining MWO, despite the forays into experimentation, I was over two thirds AF which was a huge improvement.

Consider it to be a necessary and valuable part of the journey.

I will.
Huge!! congrats on your 30 days!!
DLA :h

[stirly-girly]

Oh God...what happened..

drylifeahead;794576 wrote:

Thank you thank you thank you all for reminding me I am not an anomaly here. Not some freakish fool, all on my own.
That, even the SECOND time around, this can be won.

DLA :l

Dry - an "anomaly"??? Are you kidding? I would bet my life there is not one AF person here that didn't have to try and try again before they finally got it right. I was AF 2-1/2 years. Right from the first moment I was meds and supps free and didn't even give it a thought. I had made up my mind that I was going to stop and that was that. That is an "anomaly" here, to not even crave a sip of wine. But...AL caught up to me again. I was having trouble with insomnia and depression and suddenly AL showed up at my door offering a shoulder to cry on. Well let me tell you that I have done a lot of crying and a lot of regretting since then, the spring of 2006. Went AF again summer of '08 for a few months and then AL again. Finally after another 1-1/2 years, I have gotten my head around this whole AL thing. Mostly due to words of support, encouragement and great advice from the wonderful people here at MWO. Know you can do it and you are not an anomaly. You are just like the rest of us. You have to fight AL to win your battle. And like the rest of us, you can do it. Like KateH said, those 70 days are yours, you still own them.
So as everyone says, the lesson has been learned. From today it's heads up and one foot in front of the other. One step at a time, one day at a time. And from what you've seen on this thread so far, a lot of people are here waiting to reach out a helping hand if you start to stumble. Be strong,
Stirly:h

[drylifeahead]

Oh God...what happened..

Stirly, so sorry.
That's not what I meant.
I've tried many times as I posted in my earlier days...but, This!! was the very first super, dead on serious 'I have to gain control' go
at it.
I'll get there. Once again I will post on my beloved Monthly Abstinence Thread.

DLA :l

[Gearhead]

Oh God...what happened..

I know how you feel. My AF spells last year went for a week or two following by binging every time I tried to "moderate".

So I decide after dealing with a huge legal train wreck created by my last binge, that moderation is definitely not an option for me, not any time in the foreseeable future. I miss my cold beers less and less.

Drylife, try to remember all the reasons you DONT want to drink when you get that urge.

I can only think of bad things I did, time I missed, and people I dissappointed whenever I get the urge. My poor son worrying about his "sick" dad. That and this horrid smell, my house reeked of digested alcohol.